Replay
by SinisterChic
Summary: Complete! Highly Spuffy. Switches from a post Buffy and Angel world to season 6 again. Buffy finds out about Spike's resurrection, but it is too late to do anything about it. But is there a way for her to have a second chance?
1. Seeking out the Dead

REPLAY

Rated- PG13

Disclaimer- Joss Whedon owns the rights to Buffy and Angel

Spoilers- The ENTIRE series of Buffy and the finale of Angel

Summary- Learning of Spike's resurrection Dawn and she venture to LA in search of him. But they are too late. . . Or are they? Is there a way to fix things before they began to get dark?

Chapter 1- Seeking Out the Dead

"I don't understand, Buffy," Dawn said. "Why'd you break up with him?"

Buffy took a sip of her steaming coffee. It tasted rich on her throat, full of cream and sugar. She placed the blue mug back down on the green kitchen island. Her face remained unchanged by Dawn's question.

"I don't love the immortal," was the dry reply.

"But that's understandable. Things were still new."

"I'd never be able to love him."

Dawn crossed her arms. She stood before Buffy, her expression stern. "How can you know that for sure? I thought things were going so well."

A sigh escaped the slayer's lips. "Maybe I'm not meant to prosper when it comes to romance. Men and Buffy don't seem to mix. You love a guy and they turn evil, run off to the jungle, or decide to play hero."

There was a span of silence. Dawn's eyes softened.

"Were you talking about Spike?"

"Huh?"

"That last one. The hero? Were you talking about Spike?"

Buffy stared down into her pale beverage. It was supposed to perk her up, but she felt tired and drained.

"Did you love him?" Dawn pressed on.

When Buffy raised her head again silent tears had made their way down her cheeks. Her mouth wobbled.

"It's so hard, Dawnie. I can't forget him."

"You're not supposed to."

"But thinking about him hurts."

The teen stepped closer. She wrapped her sister up in a comforting hug. "I know," she whispered.

Buffy's crying intensified. "I told him and he didn't believe me."

Dawn pulled back slightly. "What?"

"I told him I loved him and he didn't believe me." Buffy paused. "I waited too long. And now he'll never be able to know what he means to me."

"That's not true."

Both girls turned to see Andrew standing in the doorway. He wore a bathrobe and his hair stood on end from sleep.

"What are you talking about Andrew?" Dawn asked.

Andrew came into the kitchen. "Ah, gentle listeners, gather round while I replay my journey to the retched law firm known as Wolfram and Hart."

Buffy frowned. She wiped the wetness from her face. "On with it," she said.

"Yeah," Dawn said. "Get to the point. What did you mean before?"

A large grin spread across the ex-evil villain's features. "I was sworn to secrecy, but hearing Buffy's confession has . . ."

Buffy got down from her stool. She slammed her palms down on the surface of the island.

"In one sentence, Andrew. Tell me in one sentence."

Stricken by the slayer's wrath, Andrew sobered.

"He's alive," Andrew said.

"Who?" Buffy said, confused.

"Spike. He's alive in LA."

She hardly said anything the entire plane ride. Mainly she just stared out the window, watching the land below. Dawn tried to find a way to spark up a conversation but she was too confused to gather thoughts.

Spike was alive. The why and how were a blank. They didn't really matter anyway. Spike was alive and that's all the two girls needed to know.

Buffy got her voice back after they landed, gathered their things, and got off.

"That damned vampire," Buffy said. "The way Andrew explained things it seemed like he didn't have a good reason for keeping his return a secret." Her hands balled into fists. "The things I'm going to do to him."

Hopefully, Dawn suggested," Hug him, kiss him, and hold him tight?"

Buffy's lips twitched. "Well . . . Maybe. Later. After I shake him around a bit."

Neither of them had been to Wolfram and Hart. It didn't take long to find, however. The building was located down town, surrounded by other large businesses. Buffy and Dawn gazed at the law firm in shock. It looked like it had been in an earthquake. The other buildings on the street seemed fine, though.

The place had collapsed. There were cracks in the walls and windows had shattered. Buffy shuddered. She had an eerie feeling.

"They wouldn't have been in there when . . . What do you think happened?" Dawn said.

Buffy shook her head. "Of course not. And, I don't know. Demon raid? Magic? Who knows. Hey, maybe it was the amulet again! That thing loves to destroy things." After the last part, Buffy frowned.

The slayer surveyed the street. It was deserted. It was dead quiet, too still. Even this late at night someone should have been about.

"I'm going to look for clues," Buffy informed.

With her sister behind her, Buffy examined the site. Should I go inside? she thought. The entrance was blocked. With her slayer strength she probably could have made it through, but . . . She glanced at Dawn. There was no way she was taking the teenager into that place. Even if it was still standing she wouldn't have. The rest of it could fall at any moment too.

Buffy headed away, checking the side streets. At first there was nothing, but then she found bodies. Demons were scattered facedown on the pavement.

"What the . . .?" Buffy mumbled.

The corpses became closer together and more frequent.

Holding her nose from the stench, Dawn said, "I don't like this."

"Neither do I."

Something happened here. Something big.

Suddenly there was a moan. Buffy rushed off toward the sound. Dawn followed at a slower pace. The sound led them into a narrow, darkened alley. The bodies were piled up, and Buffy stepped on a few accidentally. Her hand came up to cover her mouth when she saw one that wasn't a demon and very familiar.

"Angel!"

Buffy ran to his side. She knelt beside him. He wasn't fully conscious, but occasionally would moan or jerk. He was covered in scrapes, bruises, and stab wounds. There was even a singed part of flesh on his arm.

"Oh my God."

Dawn stepped into the alley. She gasped.

"Stay where you are, Dawnie," Buffy commanded.

"Is that Angel?" Dawn questioned.

"Yes. We have to get him out of here." She glanced up at the sky. It was lightening. "It'll be light soon."

"Where are we gonna take him?"

Using super-strength, Buffy hoisted the vampire up and over her shoulder. She carried him over to the alley opening.

"I don't know." She looked at her ex-lover, desperation coming over her. God, the sight of him squeezed at her heart. He was so beat up.

"Wait!" Buffy exclaimed. "The hotel. I don't think he sold it. We can take him there."

A short while later Buffy kicked the door open to the Hyperion hotel. It was dark. Dawn tried a light switch, but the electricity must have been shut off.

Buffy laid Angel down on a couch in the lobby. Her hand ran over his injuries lightly as she sat by his side. She wished she had a first aid kit. Hopefully his healing skills didn't need antiseptic.

Dawn stood behind the couch, watching in fright.

"Buffy, where's Spike? Andrew said he's been working for Angel," Dawn said.

"I don't know," was all Buffy could say.

"It doesn't mean anything. Right? He could have had a fight with Angel and . . . Or he didn't even know Angel was in trouble." Dawn sounded like she was searching for reassurance.

Buffy didn't answer. She removed Angel's shirt and used it to mop up the blood that trickled from a gash.

Time went by slowly. They didn't know how long it had been when Angel finally woke up. He gazed up at Buffy with incomprehension. After a moment his brain began to work again.

Angel lifted his head. "Buffy?" he croaked.

Buffy pushed him back down. "Don't move. You're hurt."

He winced. "Where are the others?"

"What others?"

"Gunn. Illyria. Spike."

Everything froze. It was hard for Buffy to breath.

"Spike was with you?" This came from Dawn.

Angel closed his eyes. "You didn't see them?"

Silence fell over the room.

"I'm the only one left," Angel whispered.

Something snapped within the blonde. She jumped to her feet and bolted. She ran out into the start of dawn. Her legs pumped wildly, propelling her toward the alley. As soon as she made it she combed the death scene. She lifted body after body.

Footsteps neared. "Buffy!"

Buffy turned to see Dawn. "Help me look," she begged.

Devastation had spread over Dawn's face. "He's not here."

Shaking, Buffy denied the statement. "No! He's got to be here! He wouldn't have left me a second time!"

Buffy's legs gave out. She crumpled to the ground as sobs escaped her. Dawn came over. She got down as well, hugging her sister.

"I'm so sorry," Dawn said.

Buffy just cried. Tears formed in the key's eyes as well. They held each other tightly, wallowing in grief.

They were so involved in their emotions that they didn't notice movement behind them. Buffy was ripped away from her sister and tossed a few feet away. Stunned, she didn't act quick enough. One of the demons hadn't been dead. It went at Dawn, imbedding its claws into her right arm. She cried out in pain.

Buffy scrambled up. Fire raged in her green eyes. She charged at the demon. Her attack was quick and brutal. Her fists flew into his face over and over. When she broke his neck, and his remains thumped to the ground, she gaped as if surprised the battle was over.

Blinking, Buffy forced herself out of her stupor. She went over to Dawn, lifting her arm.

"Are you all right?" Buffy asked.

Dawn nodded. Blood rolled down and a few drops slid off her arm. She paid no attention to it. The tears in her eyes had intensified. She threw herself at Buffy again.

"Life is so unfair! People keep dying!" Dawn cried.

Buffy stroked the teen's brown hair. Her gaze traveled across the battle scene. Her eyes widened as she made out what must have been a man. Gunn, she guessed. He was barely recognizable.

"I wish there was some way to stop this," Dawn went on.

"There isn't," Buffy said. "We just have to accept it."

"But . . ."

Green light spilled out of Dawn, enveloping them. Her head fell back, her mouth open, and her eyes enlarged.

"Dawn!" Buffy shouted with alarm.

The light absorbed into Buffy, making its way through her entire system. She couldn't help but yell at the intensity of it.

Yes, Dawn used her key power. I had a lot of trouble trying to figure out a good way to take them back to the past. It was either this or finding Jonathan's magic bone in the crater. L


	2. Back to Life, Back to Reality

**Replay**

by Heather Martin

Chapter 2- Back to Life, Back to Reality

Buffy opened her eyes to see nothing. Pitch blackness surrounded her. She reached out and her hand hit something hard. Her arms flayed frantically. She was tightly enclosed in a wooden box. She tried to scream but nothing came out.

No, not again! Oh God, her mind cried.

She pounded on the ceiling and then began to tear at the lining. She smashed her fist through the lid. The rich scent of soil flooded her nostrils.

Buffy lifted herself out of the coffin. She crawled up and up. The ground seemed forever, going on to infinity. Her lungs burned. Finally her right hand punched through grass and into the night air. She used her slayer strength to pull the rest of herself out of the grave.

She collapsed, sucking in gulps of fresh air. Her hair was in tangles, her skin caked in dirt. She glanced down to see that she wore a black dress. Sitting up, her eyes traveled over the landscape. Trees stood before her.

Where am I? she wondered.

She spotted the tombstone and her questions were answered.

Buffy Anne Summers

1981-2001

Beloved Sister

Devoted Friend

She saved the World

A Lot

Buffy scrambled to her feet. She backed away, shaking her head. It wasn't possible. She turned and ran.

* * *

"Get back."

That voice. She didn't have time to process what it meant because Dawn was shoved backwards. The sound of motors filtered into her ears. The black form before her rose toward the sound. Dawn's eyes locked on the man's back. She recognized that coat. Long, worn, and smelling of alcohol.

"Spike?" Dawn asked.

The bleached-blonde turned. A gasp escaped Dawn's lips. It was him, down to the scar across his left eyebrow. After a moment, her mind clearing from its jumbled state, she jumped up with a squeal. She slammed into him, wrapping her arms around him.

Spike froze in shock, then awkwardly patted her before pushing her away. "What was that about, nibblet?"

A giant grin spread over Dawn's face. "I can't believe this is happening. We thought you were dead."

He rose an eyebrow. "What are you goin on about?"

They were interrupted by a woman's scream from across the street. There was a crash as a chair was thrown out the window. Spike smiled to himself. Dawn shook her head. Same old Spike. Things suddenly fell into place. That was it! Old Spike, as in before the soul.

Dawn glanced around her. They stood next to a house. Her house, the house her mother had bought in Sunnydale. She spotted the mailbox. It was smashed but she could still read the address. 1630 Revello Drive. Her eyes grew big. She glanced from the house to Spike, and then to the commotion next door.

This had all happened before. More than two years ago.

Memories of the alley flooded her brain. I did this, she thought. Somehow I sent myself to . . . Wait, what was the exact date? It was sometime during the beginning of the school year.

"Spike," Dawn said. He looked over. "What day is it?"

"What?" He furrowed his brow. "Tuesday. October second."

Laughter spilled out of Dawn. "Tuesday, of course."

Spike's expression of concern deepened.

All of a sudden another motorcycle came into view, coming from around the corner. The tires screeched as it zipped toward them at a high rate.

Dawn stood up. Her mouth gaped open.

"Oh my God!" Dawn exclaimed. Something had just occurred to her. She might have brought Buffy with her on this journey through time. And today was the day she had been resurrected. She couldn't let her sister go through that again. "This is terrible! We have to get to Buffy's grave."

Dawn grabbed Spike's arm. She tugged at him. "We have to go! I can't explain it right now."

"Look, Bit. . ." Spike began.

"Please, Spike. It's important."

He shook his head. He ran at the demon on the motorcycle. He leapt, kicking the creature off. The demon landed hard on the ground. Spike confiscated the bike, hopping on.

He beckoned Dawn. "Let's fly, Pigeon."

Dawn nodded. She joined him, snatching up the kid football helmet on the way.

In a daze Buffy walked. The entire town was trashed. Litter was dispersed all over the streets, stores had been looted, houses broken into, and cars bashed in.

She forced her legs forward until she saw something that made her stop in her tracks. There was a group of demons gathered. A few barrels were positioned around them, glowing embers coming from them. There was a burning pile of trash in the background.

The leader addressed his minions. "This here is a momentous occasion, the beginning of a new era."

Buffy neared, coming up behind them.

"Now, no question, the open backroads and highways have been good to us. But we've got ourselves a juicy little burg here, just ripe for the picking. And I ain't in no hurry to leave it. You? " Razor continued.

The demon lackeys yelled 'no' in response.

"So I figure, what better way to kick off our ... semi-settling-down, than with a little christening?

There was an uproar of cheers.

"A symbolic act commemorating the new order around here ... and ridding ourselves of any not-so-pleasant reminders of the old."

Razor held up a gun and loaded it.

"All in one quick, really, really violent fell swoop." Razor held the gun higher. "Gentleman, start your engines."

Buffy saw the chains attached to the demons' motorcycles. She realized what was happening too late. Her eyes met the bot's, surprised.

"Bye bye, slayer."

Buffy took a step closer in protest. The Buffy-bot was pulled apart by the chains attached to her arms.

"No!" shouted Buffy.

All eyes fell on Buffy.

"Another one for the fires, boys," announced Razor.

Buffy backed away. A demon on a motorcycle came from behind and cut in front of her. She turned to see another one coming at her, swinging a chain over his head. Buffy ran at that one as the first one followed. She ducked, and the chain hit the first demon, knocking him off his bike.

Buffy took the opportunity to flee the scene.

* * *

Spike zigged and zagged through the graves. It was a bumpy ride over the grass and Dawn held tightly to her friend. They traveled on until the markers began to thin out. Spike skidded to a stop.

Spike hopped off and slowly made his way to a tombstone that stood aloof from the others. It was hidden partially by trees, as if they might be able to protect it.

Dawn removed her helmet, dropping it to the ground. She hurried to Spike's side. She took in her sister's grave. The ground had collapsed, creating a hole.

"We're too late," Dawn said.

Spike just stared at where his love used to rest.

"We have to find her," Dawn continued.

Suddenly Spike rushed at a tree. His left hand formed a fist and he smashed it into the trunk. "Arrgh!"

"Spike!"

Spike fell to his knees. Dawn wasn't sure because he was facing away, but she guessed he was crying.

"Spike, are you okay?"

It took a moment for him to reply. "Someone took her. . . Bloody hell, can't leave sleeping slayers lie. You think after death they could show some respect."

Dawn shook her head. "No. It's not like that."

He spun around. His face was smeared with tears. "What is it like then?"

Dawn's expression softened. "Buffy's alive."

Spike's eyes widened. "What did you do?"

"Me? I didn't do anything. It was Willow."

"The witch?" He picked himself up. He briskly wiped his cheeks. "Of course Red couldn't leave well enough alone."

"I know you hate magic, Spike, but it's Buffy. She's back." She grabbed his arm. "And we have to find her. We can't let her wander through town."

* * *

Buffy jumped down into an alley. She had finally managed to escape the hellions. She righted herself to come face-to-face with four familiar figures.

"Watch it," the male said.

"It. . . It's the Buffy-bot," someone else said.

Buffy squinted at the speaker. She knew that she knew her but her brain wouldn't cooperate.

"Ah, peachy. No doubt to lead the wild bunch right to us again. Hey Will, next time this thing's damaged, couldn't ya program it to find the nearest Radio Shack, or..." the man said.

The red-head studied her. "Buffy?"

Buffy's eyes scanned the group fearfully. Her heart thumped wildly in her chest. Her mind felt like it would explode from overdrive. She clutched at her head.

"Buffy, is it really you?"

"Buffy?" Xander asked.

Xander. That was the man's name.

"It's Willow. Can you hear me?"

Lifting her head, Buffy looked at the woman with red hair. "Willow?"

A relieved smile came to Willow's mouth. "Yes. Willow. Oh, Buffy, you're really here."

"I-I can't think straight," Buffy whispered. Her hands shook.

"Her hands are bleeding," Tara said.

"She's filthy," Anya commented.

Xander pointed at his resurrected best friend. "Oh no!"

"What?" Willow asked with confusion.

"How could we be so stupid!?"

"Xander!"

"Our spell worked like a magic charm. We brought you back to life, Buffy." Xander glanced at Willow. "Right where we left her."

Shock spread over them.

"Oh god," Willow murmured.

"In her coffin," Xander finished.

Willow turned away. Tara hugged her, trying to offer as much comfort as possible.

Broken, Xander turned back to Buffy. "We're sorry. We didn't know."

There was a span of silence. Buffy kept watching them, taking in their actions.

"I . . . I don't understand," Buffy muttered.

"It's okay," Xander said. "You don't need to. Take it slow. All that matters is that you're home now. We brought you back. You're home with us."

Buffy opened her mouth to speak. She didn't get a chance to have anything come out, though. That was when Razor interrupted.

"Yeah, welcome home, slayer," Razor said.

His minions roamed in the back, eager to wreak havoc. All they needed was a signal from their leader.

"Alive and kickin after all." He paused. "Not lookin so good, though, is she?"

"I don't see you winning too many beauty contests," Xander punned. Xander hefted his sword. "Unless the Miss 'My face fell off' pageant gets going."

"Big axe you got there."

"The better to cut you down to size, grandma."

The others seemed nervous. Razor took a step toward them.

"Ah. So you got a witch in the mix," Razor said.

Tara held Willow's hand. "More than one."

"I happen to be a very powerful man-witch myself." Xander noticed the demon's amused look. "Or. . . male . . ." He glanced over his shoulder. "Is it a warlock?"

A nod from Willow was sent his way.

"Warlock."

"Plus, we have a Slayer here, uh, who might actually be looking to eat some brains, so, I think a little quiet moseying, no hard feelings, and I'm sure your demon horde won't think any the less of you," Anya took the liberty to say.

"Now, my boys, see, that's tricky. They came looking for a massacre..."

Out of nowhere Buffy's fist flew, cutting him off. It hit with a great amount of power, flinging his head to the side. Her entire stance had changed. It was commanding. Her veins flowed with slayer instinct.

Buffy rolled her shoulders. "I'm beginning to get this," she said. A grin formed on her lips. "I think I like it."

Her friends watched in amazement.

Buffy punched Razor again. "I don't know about eating brains, but I think I can kick your ass." She kicked him in the gut. He went flying to the ground unconscious.

She hovered over Razor's inert body. Then she directed her gaze to the other demons. "Who's next?"

One of the demons charged at her. With ease she grabbed his arm and swung him. He landed roughly to the pavement. Two more came forward. She kneed one in the groin, ducked a punch, rose, and then offered her own.

"Anyone else?" Buffy prompted.

The remaining demons exchanged glances. Then they turned and ran.

Buffy turned around. She stalked over to a metal rod. She picked it up and twirled it for show. Then she went over to the fallen Razor. In a brutal act, she impaled him with it. His eyes flew open and he hollered. Buffy twisted the rod and he went still again.

"She's Buffy," Xander commented. "She's herself again."

Buffy turned toward Xander.

"Wow, Buff, we didn't even have to help out. You're back. You really are."

Xander stepped over with outstretched arms. She accepted the hug.

"Yeah, I am," she said. Then she added more softly, "And so is your eye."

He pulled back. "What'd you say?"

She smiled. "Nothing."

Willow came over as well. Buffy embraced her.

"It's good to see you guys," Buffy said. She looked over at Tara and Anya. Her smile wobbled. "Tara, Anya, hey." She beckoned them to join the reunion.

The newbie Scoobies seemed surprised but obeyed.

After a group hug, Buffy said, "Let's go home."

* * *

What do you think? 


	3. Walls

REPLAY

Thanks everyone for the comments. I love you all. More Spuffy action next chapter, I promise.

**Chapter 3- Walls**

The scoobies hardly took their eyes off their leader and friend the entire way. Buffy could understand. It was amazing to get back someone you had lost. She was going through the same thing. She had to restrain herself from crushing Tara and Anya with another hug. One moment they're not there and then bam, they are. Wait a sec . . .

Buffy abruptly stopped walking. Everyone sent her questioning glances, which she ignored.

Spike!

The revelation was too much. Spike was alive. Or undead, the technical term was. Nevertheless, he was there. Her heart thumped wildly.

"Buffy, are you all right?" Willow asked.

"What? Oh, uh huh. I was just thinking about Dawn. She isn't home alone, is she?" Buffy covered.

Tara stepped up from the back of the group. She gave Buffy a sweet smile. "We wouldn't leave her by herself. She's with Spike."

It was one thing to think about Spike being back in her life; it was another having it confirmed. She became dizzy.

"G-Good," Buffy stammered.

She quickened her pace. She didn't think, instead running on automatic. All she knew was that she needed to get home.

Revello Drive was a mess. Trash cans had been tossed around. Pieces of glass were scattered over the pavement. The Summers house stood unharmed, except for the crushed mailbox. Buffy hardly noticed the damage. Instead her attention was riveted to the dark windows.

He's not here, Buffy thought. She remembered what had happened the first time. He had come looking for Dawn. Apparently her sister was out with him, not having wondered off. All she had to do was be patient.

The door was unlocked. At first that made her nervous, but then recalled it being that way before when Dawn led her home before. The place was dark and silent. She took a hesitant step inside. She just stood in the entryway, unsure of going any further.

Willow stepped around her and flipped on the light switch. Her eyes were flooded with luminescence, and things came into focus. Everything was there: her mother's coffee table, standing erect with not even a scratch on it, the small television, the sofa, and pictures. The pictures had the most impact. She ran her fingers over the glass frame that covered her smiling mother. 

Distantly Buffy could hear her friends talking. They were discussing Dawn. They weren't sure where Spike and her had gone.

Buffy sat down on the couch, clutching Joyce's photo. She watched the other four people, detached. Things didn't feel real. It was as if she were watching a movie, instead of taking part in what was going on.

Tara was the first person to bring Buffy back in. She came toward the slayer slowly, a little concerned.

"B-Buffy? How are you doing?" the timid woman asked.

Buffy's head shot up. She opened her mouth. "I . . ."

The conversation about Dawn died away. Everyone turned to Buffy. She was bombarded by their voices speaking all at once.

"Buffy?" That came from Willow.

"Do you need anything?" Xander inquired.

"You don't have brain damage do you? Sometimes when people come back, well zombies anyway –"

"Ahn!" Xander scolded.

"She's fine, she's not a zombie," Willow said.

"What do you know about what happened?" Tara asked.

Buffy's mind reeled. She couldn't seem to form a sentence. Couldn't they calm down and speak more slowly?

"What was it like?" Anya questioned.

"It's okay. You don't have to talk about this, Buff. Hey, do you want something? Anything. Pizza. I'll get you pizza," Xander offered.

"Buffy likes pizza."

"Yeah, something to eat," Tara said.

"She doesn't want pizza," Willow said.

"I just meant-"

The door burst open. Buffy shot to her feet. The picture fell from her lap, crashing to the floor. She gasped, hoping it was all right. She didn't get a chance to check. She almost tumbled back as she was hit by her sister.

"Buffy!" Dawn cried.

"Dawn?" Buffy whispered. She ran a hand over Dawn's head. "What did you do?"

Dawn pulled back. "You remember?"

Softly, Buffy replied, "Yeah."

"I don't know how I did it. The light just came out of nowhere."

"We have to get to the magic shop and research . . ."

Someone else burst into the house.

"Dawn!" 

Buffy froze.

A deafening silence fell over the group. After what seemed like an hour Buffy mustered enough courage to look toward the voice. She was captivated by blue eyes. He tilted his head to the side.

"Buffy?" It came out hoarse.

Buffy glanced down at herself, realizing that she was still covered in dirt. She almost laughed. Great, it's our reunion and I'm a mess.

"Your hands," Spike said. "It's true then. Clawed yourself out of a coffin?"

Buffy hid her bleeding hands. "That's- what I had to do."

Spike moved forward, about ready to take her hands.  Then he noticed everyone else. Xander glared at him warningly, ready to step in if need be. Spike let his arms fall to his sides.

Buffy knew then that with her friends around, major blockage stood in the way between Spike and herself. No good could come of it. Sudden inspiration came to her.

"I'm tired," she said.

"That's good. You-You should sleep," Tara said.

"Oh," Willow said. "Long day."

"Well yeah, jet leg from hell must be . . . jet leg from hell," Anya commented.

Buffy shot them a look. Oh yeah, they still thought she had come back from the fiery depths. There was no way she was dealing with that now. She would- soon. But not now.

Spike nodded. "Right. I'll go." His face was blank, his eyes hollow orbs. In a flash he was gone. Buffy stared at the spot he had stood for a moment.

She faked a yawn. "Tired. See ya in the morning."

"Goodnight," Tara said.

Willow flashed her a grin. "Be happy, Buffy, we got you out. We really did it."  

Buffy had to restrain herself from grabbing her best friend and shaking her. Stupid witch!

Buffy managed to go up the steps and into her room calmly. She shut and locked the door with a long sigh. She leaned against the door for a couple minutes. Then she went over to the window, opened it, and climbed out.

She hadn't snuck out of the house since high school. The memory made her smile slightly. She crouched on a tree branch and then jumped down. She landed perfectly. I'm like a cat, she thought.

Buffy straightened. She scanned the darkness. There wasn't a radioactive head in sight. I guess it's to the cemetery I come.


	4. Hold Me

REPLAY

**Chapter 4- Hold Me**

His crypt stood amongst the shadows, only standing out by a few stray moonbeams. She stood before it for a moment, admiring the structure. This was a place of death, and yet she had found life within its walls. It was a contradiction, same as its occupant.

Buffy paused at the door. Her first instinct was to kick her way in, but stopped herself. She had to start anew, and knocking would be the best footing. She lifted her right hand and brought it down on the stone entrance. She repeated the act three times without an answer. Growing frustrated, she let out a huff.

That was it, she was barging in. She slammed her foot against the door. It burst open instantly.

The tomb was dark.  Thanks to slayer vision, she managed to make her way through it. She ran her hand over Spike's green chair.

"Spike!?" she called.

There was no reply.

She found the ladder that led to the lower level. She climbed down. The familiar musty scent that could only belong to a cellar filtered into her nose. I'm going to have to get him some scented candles or air freshener, she thought.

She surveyed Spike's 'bedroom'. For a vampire it was rather 'posh'. She grinned at the Oriental rug that lay next to the bed. She removed her athletic shoes and played her toes over the woven carpeting.

Buffy's green eyes roamed to the bed. The sight was alluring. Oh, how large it is. She had never realized how big it was. She had always been preoccupied with other things. But now that she thought about it, they had never fallen off. And believe me; they had some wild times that needed tremendous space.

I'll take good care of you this time, Buffy vowed. I won't let any flame touch you.

Buffy found herself stepping over to the unmade bed. She couldn't help herself from plopping down on the mattress. Mmm, cozy. She rolled onto her stomach, pressing her face into the cool pillow. Spike, she thought dreamily. Geez, girl, Buffy thought, you have it bad.

Buffy's eyes fluttered closed. I'll just rest until he returns, she decided. He won't be long. He's probably only at Willy's bar getting drunk.   

Which was exactly where he was. But afterwards, Spike let his rage explode. He snapped demon neck after demon neck. Fights usually gave him comfort, but not tonight. Nothing seemed to numb the pain.

Tipsy, Spike made it to his crypt. He opened the door and stumbled inside. Manic laughter spilled from his throat.

The world was some screwed up place. It didn't follow the rules anymore. Vampire = evil. Slayer = good. Vampire slayer = enemies. Death = gone.  

Spike tossed his duster to the raggedy chair before his television. Then he found the ladder. Funny, he was sure he had left the trapdoor closed before leaving. He missed his footing once while going down. He hadn't been this smashed in a long while.

He fumbled in the dark over to the bed. He threw himself down upon it.

"Eeep!"

Spike jumped up. He studied the spot he had landed on.

"B-Buffy? Is that you?" he questioned.

She brought the silk sheet to her chin. She stared up at him. "I like your bed," she said.

He blinked, confused. "Is that so?"

"Yeah. The rugs and chairs are a nice touch as well. Homey."

The vampire reached over and turned on a light. Television, fridge, lights, furniture, rugs . . . he's practically domestic. The slayer and her friends had ruined him.

Spike stared her down. She hugged the sheet to her, clearly uncomfortable.

"Are you naked under there?" Spike found himself asking.

Her eyes widened. "What!?"

He smirked. "Just curious."

Buffy threw the black sheets off her form. She lay there fully clothed to his disappointment.

"Buffy, what are you doing here?"

"I uh. . . "She sat up. "I wanted to see you."

"Uh huh." His mind was clearing now, and he felt the familiar throb of soberness coming on. Sometimes it sucked being a vampire. Alcohol didn't have as much effect on them as the regular Joe down the street.

Buffy fumbled with her hands. Spike eyed them, realizing they were still unattended. He left her side to retrieve the first aid kit. There wasn't really a good reason for a vampire to own such a thing. He had stolen it a year ago, when his infatuation had started. He didn't want to be empty handed if his slayer turned up bleeding to death.

He removed the gauze. He knelt, took her hands gently, and began to wrap them.

Taking in a breath, Buffy said, "How long was I gone?"

Spike looked up from his ministrations. "Hundred forty-seven days yesterday. Uh ... hundred forty-eight today." He smiled slightly. " 'Cept today doesn't count, does it?"

He could have sworn Buffy was about to cry.

"How long was it for you ... where you were?"

"Longer." Her voice came out small and with great emotion.

So long. Forever really, Buffy thought. I've been forever without you. I've never really even had you. What would it be like to have you?

Buffy's hands twitched. She longed to reach up and touch him, to smash his mouth down upon hers. She remembered the way he tasted. The taste of bourbon and blood should have been vile, but mixed together with the sweetness of Spike it turned into honey.   

Spike finished the task of wrapping her scrapes. He stood up and shut the first aid kit.

"Willow's getting pretty strong, isn't she? Bringing you back. It's hard to get a good night's death around here," he said.

Buffy didn't quite know how to respond to that.

Spike began to pace.

"I do remember what I said. The promise. To protect her. . . If I had done that ... even if I didn't make it ... you wouldn't have had to jump."

Oh God. Buffy's eyes burned. This time around his words hit closer to her heart.

"But I want you to know I did save you. Not when it counted, of course, but ... after that. Every night after that. I'd see it all again ... do something different. Faster or more clever, you know? Dozens of times, lots of different ways ... Every night I save you."

Buffy couldn't help it. A trickle of water escaped her eye. She couldn't move, couldn't speak, could only gaze up at the blond vampire as the tears fell.

Spike ran a hand through his hair. "Every night," he whispered.

Spike abruptly stopped. Stricken, by the sight of her tears, he came over and wiped them away. "Don't cry."

She buried her face in his chest. "Just hold me," she murmured.

Awkwardly, he placed his arms around her small frame. She cried for Spike's guilt, his pain from her dying, her loss of heaven, his death in the future . . . and also from happiness. Happiness that he was there now, that she was there now, that they were there together.

When Buffy left she had made a decision. This time would be different. She would make things right. She'd take things slow, and Spike and she would end up all right.  Not only them, though, but also Xander and Anya, and Willow and Tara. Everything would be as it should be.

Yeah, I know, she didn't kiss him and confess to her smoldering love. Maybe later. But right now she wants to take it slow and do things right. And hey, he did hold her. That's something.


	5. Too Many Maybes

REPLAY

_That's the thing about magic. There's always consequences. Always! Spike, AfterLife_

**Chapter 5- Too Many Maybes**

When Buffy returned she was greeted by the entire household. Dawn stood near the living room entrance, dressed in her cloud pajamas and pink slippers. Tara and Willow sat next to each other on the couch. The red-head was huddled in Tara's arms, the other witch shushing soothingly. Buffy furrowed her brow at the sight of Willow's swollen eyes.

"What'd I miss?" Buffy asked.

Dawn's head whipped toward her. "Buffy? Where have you been?"

"I-I went out to patrol. Couldn't sleep."

Dawn nodded. Buffy knew her sister was aware of where she had really been. 

Tara glanced up from her troubled lover. "Willow had a bad dream."

The slayer narrowed her eyes at that. A dream shouldn't have caused this kind of commotion. It had to have been more than a mere nightmare to coax the wiccans downstairs and arouse her sister. She sent Tara a look that said 'Please elaborate'.

"It. . . It was bad," Tara said.

Willow lifted her head. "It seemed so real."

Buffy took a step further into the room. "What'd you dream, Wills?"

"I . . ." She looked over at Tara. "We were in our room. We had just woken up, I think. We were smiling and laughing and . . . then . . ." Her voice wavered. She clutched onto Tara.

"I got shot," Tara finished.

The dim light was just enough for Buffy to catch the shimmering in her best friend's eyes. She turned toward Dawn, who must have been thinking the same thing. This all sounded too familiar.

"Buffy, what do your slayer dreams feel like?"

"Wh-What?"

"It was so real, Buffy. I could smell the blood. I could see her eyes go dark as I cradled-" She let out a sob.

Buffy came over and sat on the other side of Willow. She touched her shoulder. She felt Willow shake. 

"No. It wasn't a premonition. It was only a dream. It meant nothing," Buffy lied. 

"I'll put her back to bed," Tara offered.

Buffy nodded.

She watched as Tara helped Willow off the couch and toward the upstairs. Then she shifted her gaze to fall on Dawn. The teenager had a frown on her face. They were silent for a long time.

"Do you think -?" Dawn started.

"I don't know, Dawnie. Maybe."

A paused passed between them.

"It doesn't mean we can't prevent it," Buffy said.

"Should we tell them?"

The question hit hard. Buffy mulled it over. She had decided that keeping things secret was bad. Telling her friends might help them to make better choices. But it would also cause grief. Lots of grief.

"Let's hold off. We will if we have to."

"Okay."

Buffy glanced at the clock. "It's late. You have school tomorrow."

"Do I have to go? My brain has two years more knowledge than what it is supposed –"

"No," Buffy interrupted, sternly.

Pouting, she said, "Thought so."

She came over to give Buffy a hug. The two siblings embraced, taking their time about it.

"Goodnight," Dawn said.

"Goodnight," Buffy reiterated.

Dawn headed toward her room, Buffy behind her. Suddenly she halted. She spun around.

"Hey, where's the demon?"

"Huh?"

"That demon Willow created. It didn't show up."

Buffy blinked, holding onto the banister. This all wasn't settling right.

Dawn shrugged. "Maybe the universe knows what we did. It knows that you already were brought back before and so it didn't make us pay a price."

Buffy didn't know what to think. She was at a total loss.

"Maybe," Buffy said.

They continued on their way to bed.

I know this is short, but it is a good place to stop. I'm off to write the next part so don't worry.


	6. Heaven

REPLAY

**Chapter 6- Heaven**

Buffy awoke, knowing what she had to do. She may have decided not to tell Xander and Willow about traveling into the past, but there was something she had to confess. The sooner the better. Keeping it inside would only make it harder.

She made lunch for Dawn and caught up with her sister on her way out.

"Dawn!"

Buffy ran out, carrying the paper-sack. Inside was a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, a granola bar, banana, and fruit drink. It wasn't the most glamorous meal but it was better than the vending machine food she was sure Dawn would eat otherwise.

Dawn spun around. "What?"

Handing the bag over, Buffy said, "Lunch."

Dawn grinned. "Thanks."

Buffy smiled back, but it faded after a moment.

"I'm telling them today."

Dawn sobered. "Are you sure they're ready? Are 'you' ready?"

"I have to."

They hugged.

"I wish I could be there for you. If you want I could stay," Dawn said. 

"Nice try," Buffy said. "But no."

"I'm not trying to ditch," Dawn defended. "I'm seriously just trying to offer my support. This is more important than school."

"I appreciate it, but I'll be fine. Now hurry up before you're late."

After Dawn left, Buffy stood there for awhile. She closed her eyes and breathed in deeply. The sun shone down on her and warmed her face.

I can do this, she thought.

She made her feet travel across town to The Magic Box. She mustered her courage and reached for the door handle. Something occurred to her and she pulled back.

Spike. He should be here. He was part of the gang whether the others liked it or not.  She knew exactly where to find him.

Buffy rounded the building. She stepped into the alley near the back of the shop. She spotted Spike. They both stopped immediately at the other's presence.

He shoved his hands into his duster. "Slayer."

Buffy glanced up at the sky. Clouds had passed over, concealing the sun. He was safe for now.

"Were you headed inside?" she asked.

"That was the plan, yeah."

"Good. I have something to say to everyone."

He seemed surprised by that. It was probably the fact that she actually wanted him included in the Scooby meeting.

"Right, lead the way," he said.

They headed in through the training room. Heads turned their way when they passed into the main part of the store. Tara sat in a chair, with Willow standing next to her. The couple was putting books on a shelf. Xander and Anya stood by the research table.

Willow gave Buffy a smile. "Buffy, hey," she greeted.

Xander noticed Spike. He frowned, but other than that chose to ignore him.

"Hey, you get Dawn off to school all right? 'Cause I was thinking, if you need help picking her up, I..."

"It's okay. I got it." Buffy fumbled with her hands. "Look, you guys, um, there's this thing I gotta say . . . so, uh, here goes."

Buffy snuck a peek at Spike. He leaned against a shelf, eyeing her with concern. She wished that she could take his hand. It wasn't the fact that her friends were watching that restrained her from doing so, but the fear that it was too soon.  She didn't want to screw things up with him again. Still, him being there gave her a little confidence.

Everyone stared at Buffy expectantly. Her eyes darted around.

"You brought me back." She swallowed. This is it. "I was . . . I wasn't . . . God this is hard."

Willow took a step toward her. "Buffy?"

"I was in heaven."

Buffy met Willow's eyes. She saw horror there. For a second, just a second, Buffy felt guilty.

Tara stood up. She looked as if she were trying to decide what to do. She ended up rubbing Willow's arm.

"Oh God," Willow said.

"Buffy, we didn't know," Xander proclaimed.

Spike remained silent. His expression spoke a thousand words, though. It was dark and menacing.

"What was it like?" Anya abruptly asked.

Xander turned toward his fiancé. "Ahn, not now," he scolded.

She shut up.

Willow was about ready to fall. Tara wrapped a strong arm around her.

"I'm so sorry!" Willow cried. "If I'd known."

Buffy should have been angry. Two years ago she probably would have shouted at the red-head about the laws of nature. Instead she felt calm and level-headed.

"I know," she said. She scanned the group. "No one knew. There isn't much I can say. I was happy. Warm. Loved."

Tears silently fell down Willow's cheeks. She leaned heavily against her girlfriend.

"You took me away from that. I'm not blaming you, but I can't say I'm happy about it." Buffy paused. "What's done is done. There is no taking it back. I'm here and I'm just going to have to deal with that."

No one spoke. No one knew how to proceed.

Buffy gave them all a meaningful look before exiting the shop. She walked over to the memorable packing crate outside. She sat down and took a breather.

It was done. The notion didn't bring any comfort.   

She heard footsteps and raised her head. Spike stepped in front of her.

"Ran out of there mighty quick," he said.

"Needed to get away. To be alone," she said.

"Oh, uh, right."

He started to leave. He stopped at the edge of the shade, realizing the sun had come out.

"I can be alone with you here."

He turned back around. "Thanks ever so."  

He took a moment to study her. "Are you okay?" he asked.

"I will be."

"If you ever need anything . . . If there is anything I can do . . ."

She gave him a tiny smile. "You can't. But thanks for offering. It means a lot. More than you know."

Spike stared at her. She shifted in her seat, uncomfortable by the attention.

He came over and sat beside her.

"Do you wanna talk about it?"

She didn't. She didn't want to remember the peace she had left behind. Someday she'd go back there. But not yet. Right now she had to concentrate on living.

Buffy moved to grab his hand. It hadn't felt right inside, but here and now it did. He tilted his head to the side, questionably.  Then he squeezed her fingers in unison.

They gazed out into the sun together.

I just love that ending part. Hope you do too.


	7. Bring on the Green Stuff

REPLAY

I'm planning a sequel after this called Second the First. It'll be a revised season seven. But no need to worry about that yet, there is still lots of Replay to deal with beforehand. Enjoy.

**Chapter 7- Bring on the Green Stuff**

Buffy lurked in the dark. She surveyed her surroundings with caution. She passed the stairs to face a leaking pipe. She looked up at it with disdain.

"So we meet again Mr. Drippy," she said.

The stairs creaked. Buffy turned to see Dawn.

"You aren't going to try and fix it again, are you?"

"I've learned my lesson."

"Good." The brunette held up a cordless phone. "I've got the number for the plumber. Want me to call?"

A sigh escaped the slayer. "Please do."

She heard Dawn dial the number and request for assistance. What was that they had needed? Full copper re-pipe. That was it. She shut her eyes. We can't pay for it. She wished the new high school was done being built. Then she could go hang around it until she met up with Principal Wood.

A couple hours later Buffy leaned against the kitchen island. She sipped at a cup of coffee. Dawn sat across from her, munching on a bowl of Captain Crunch cereal. Willow and Tara giggled, popping marshmallows from a Lucky Charms box into each others mouth. Occasionally the sisters would shoot amused smiles to the other over the display.

The basement door opened. Xander and a man emerged. The man carried a toolbox.

"And a big Sunnydale round of applause for Tito the Amazing plumber extraordinaire," Xander said.

"So, how's everything looking down there?" Tara questioned.

"Tito says that if you waited any longer it would have flooded. Then we would have had to start gathering up two of every animal."

"Basically the pipes are shot," Tito said. "I mean the whole system's gonna have to be replaced. What you need is a full copper re-pipe job."

Willow came over. "Full copper re-pipe? That sounds potentially pricey."

Tito handed her a piece of paper. She scanned it, her eyes getting large.

"Well, if you have any questions our number's on the invoice," Tito informed. He patted Xander on the shoulder and then left.

Dawn hopped down from her stool. She went over to peek at the invoice. Willow pulled it away.

"Tell me that's the phone number at the bottom," Dawn said.

"Hey, Tito cut you a good deal down there. Those are bargain prices." He glanced at Buffy. "I did a little haggling for you."

Buffy smiled. "Thank you." She bit her lip. "We'll have to pay him. No big. I'll just get a job."

All eyes fell on her.

"What?"

Dawn looked sympathetic. "Don't work at The Doublemeat," she begged.

"I hear Burger Hut is hiring," Xander said.

"Hey, Buffy can do better than that," Tara protested.

"Money's an issue. If Buffy has to get a temporary -," Willow began.

"Willow's right," Buffy interrupted. "I'll do what I have to do." She looked at Dawn. "Even employ myself at The Doublemeat hell."

Filling out job applications sucked. Every one was the exact same. Name, education history, address, phone number, age, past employment (not that she had any. Not in this time anyway). . .

She steered clear of the fast food joints. She wouldn't go there until she found it necessary.

The Expresso Pump was particularly rude. The cashier gave her a disapproving glare before practically throwing the application in her face. She almost hoped they wouldn't call.

The bookstore guy was nice enough. He handed the form to her let her sit in one of the reading chairs to fill it out. When she returned it, however, he wanted to chat.

"It is always nice to meet another bookworm," he said. He pushed his wire rim glasses further up his nose.

She let out a nervous laugh.

"Ever read The Time Machine? It's my favorite book."

She made the mistake of saying, "I saw that one. Didn't know they made a novelization from the film."

He frowned at her.

Buffy realized too late that The Time Machine must have been based off a book instead of the other way around. I didn't stay in college long enough, she thought. This was Giles's ideal job, not hers. She left, not holding her breath about getting hired.

She also applied at the video store. The gang would be pleased if she got that one. Free rentals. Her last stop was the 24 hour coffee shop. Buffy liked coffee, and she knew how to make, it so why not? True, she wasn't familiar with the fancy cappuccino, lattes, etcetera, but she could learn.

Buffy remembered going into the place once when it used to be a bookstore. Giles had dragged her in when it first opened up. It sure had changed since then. It was bright, with red booths, checkered floor, and a counter with stools. There was a jukebox near the entrance.

Buffy swept her eyes over the menu. Ooo, frozen coffees! There was a picture of the banana one with whipped cream. She wondered if they gave employees free drinks.

"Can I help you?" a young woman asked. Her nametag said Amie.

Relief ran through Buffy. No cow uniform. Instead Amie was wearing an apron.

"Yes, I'd like an application," Buffy said with a smile.

"Oh, sure."

Amie reached down below the cash register. She was about to hand over the application when there was a scream. Buffy turned just in time to see a man get tossed through the window. Glass went everywhere.

The door flew open to reveal a large demon. He had ridges and fins on his head. He let out a loud roar.

Buffy groaned. "Oh, look, it's the mmmm cookie monster," she grumbled.

"Slayer," he growled.

She took in his clothing. He had on a black shirt beneath a red one, with grey slacks and a belt. "Are you trying to blend in? Sorry, I don't think it's work."

She looked around for a weapon. They must have a knife somewhere.

Suddenly Buffy felt herself being grabbed. She was shoved behind the counter.

"Hey!" she protested.

"You seriously aren't going to fight him?" a male voice said.

She squirmed in his grasp. "You think I can't take him?"

She broke away to see the guy who was trying to act as her savior. He was cute in the boy-next-door way. His nametag read Rick.

She stood up. "I know you mean well, Rick, but I can-"

The demon was gone. She let out a sigh of frustration.

Buffy found Amie. "About my application . . ."

Amie blinked.

"What happened to my shop?" boomed a man.

Buffy lifted her head to see what must be the owner.

"Who made this mess?"

Amie pointed at Buffy.

"Get out!"

"They kicked you out? That's crazy!" Willow was shocked.

"Yeah, that's what happened all right," Buffy said.

The slayer punched at the punching bag wildly.

"I can't believe it," Willow went on. "It isn't fair."

Buffy kept hitting the swinging bag.

"You weren't responsible for the demon raiding the shop."

Buffy stopped and steadied the punching bag. She closed her eyes. "I wish the council would pay me."

"Kinda hard when you keep telling them off. Not that that isn't a good thing. Because it is. They need to be put in their place."

"Yeah."

Talking about the council made Buffy realize something. Her eyes popped back open. Giles would show up in a few moments. She smiled.

"Here he is," Dawn declared as Buffy came out of the training room. She propped up an old book. "He's called Mmm-Fashnik."

"Or 'Muh'-Fashnik," Xander commented.

Buffy sneaked a grin at her sister. "I'm with Dawn. Like Mmm cookies, right?"

"That's him," Buffy continued. "Big bad. This thing was strong, guys. No weapons that I could see, but . . ."

She sensed something and lifted her head. "Still . . . real . . . dangerous."

Giles stared at his thought-of daughter. He dropped his bags near the entrance. Then he started toward her.

"Oh God, Buffy," he said. A giant smile formed on his lips.

Buffy smiled back. She was ready for his hug. She closed her eyes with emotion.

"You're alive. You're here. And you're still . . . remarkably strong."

A laugh escaped Buffy. She let go. "Sorry."

Giles studied her face. "Willow told me, but I didn't really let myself believe."

"Seeing is believing."

"Yes, well, I'm still having difficulty believing what my eyes are telling me."

"There's no need to clean your glasses. I'm real."

"It's uh . . . you're a . . ."

"Miracle," Buffy inserted.

"Yes. But then I always thought so."

He put a hand to her cheek. The others watched the scene happily.

Giles watched her as she made up the small couch. The sheets and pillow case had bright kiddie patterns all over them. She looked over apologetically after tucking in the sheets.

"I know they're so cute you could die. Sorry. Mom used to handle this stuff. I have no idea where she hid the guest sheets," Buffy said.

"Quite all right." He added the pillow to the bed-substitute.

"I blame the sofa. We need one of those pull-out kinds." She sighed. "Maybe after I get a job. I've been looking."

He eyed her in surprise. "Really?"

Buffy sat down. "Yeah. I don't qualify for an office job, but I've been filling applications out."

Squeezing her hand, he said, "I wish you the best of luck."

There was a span of silence. She shifted in her seat under his scrutiny.

"What is it?" she asked.

"Oh, uh . . ." He cleared his throat.

"The others told you, didn't they?"

He snatched off his glasses. He continued to clean them. "Considering the circumstances I find your adjustment quite remarkable."

Buffy stared across the room. "I'm like that. Wonder girl."

"Yes, you certainly are."

"I'm all right," she assured him.

Later that night Giles ventured into the kitchen. He found Willow at the island. A box of cookies sat on the surface but she paid no attention to them. It was dark, but if the light had been on Giles would have caught her bloodshot eyes.

"You have a good talk with Buffy?" Willow managed to get out.

"Yes, now that she is back," Giles replied.

The witch glanced down at her hands.

"Tell me about this spell you performed."

"I'd rather not."

He turned toward her sternly. "You can't do something of this notion and . . .! You are a very stupid girl!"

"Don't you think I know that!?" Tears formed in her eyes. It wasn't long before they slid down her face. "I sucked my best friend out of heaven."

Giles stood there a moment. Finally he reached out and put a comforting arm around the young woman, yet still a little girl in many ways.

Buffy stood at the front porch. In her right hand was a large sward. She seemed a tad bored.

"M is for cookies, and cookies are for me," she sang absently.

"That's C. I don't get you, Summers," came a voice.

Buffy's head shot up. She took in Spike. His dark form merged into the night, but his bright hair set him aside.

"Hello, Spike."

He gestured to her weapon. "And what is that for exactly?"

She held up the sward. "I'm waiting for the cookie monster." She burst out laughing.

He raised an eyebrow. "You know, the bit and you get weirder everyday."

Spike took a step forward. He nodded toward the house. "You hear that?"

She followed his gaze. "No. Are Willow and Giles fighting?"

"No, but I think the witch feels a bit guilty."

With a sigh, Buffy sat down on the top step. "Am I a horrible person if I say she should be?"

Spike sat down next to her. "Wrong person to ask."

The two sat together in silence for a few moments. She was greatly aware of his presence. Too aware. He was so close. He shifted, brushing against her hand. Oh God.

Would it be too soon to kiss him?

She had always had a weak spot for him when he was like this. He was so open and concerned. This was Spike as his truest self.

All of a sudden Buffy's slayer senses set off the alarms. She scanned the darkness and then hopped to her feet. She clutched her sword tightly.

"Just a sec," she told Spike.

The demon rushed at her. She leveled her sword and swung. The blade passed through his neck like butter. His head fell from his body and hit the ground. The rest of him followed. She let her bloody sword slip from her hands.

She spun around.

"Do I have demon goo on me?"

Spike smirked. "Not that I can see. Was that the cookie monster, pet?"

"Yep. No more cookies for him," she said. She made her way back over to the steps.

"Looks different from what I remember the kiddies watchin."

"It's like they say," Buffy said. "You always look different on TV."

With that, Buffy sat back down beside her vampire, very pleased with herself.

He he, couldn't help but include some reference to Sesame Street.


	8. And So it Happens Again Sorta

REPLAY

Sometimes I worry about myself. C is for cookies, not M. I think I got M because 'cookies are for me'. L I fixed the last part. Now Spike corrects Buffy for her mistake.

**Chapter 8- And So It Happens Again (Sorta)**

She wasn't prepared for the call. She knew it was coming, but she still wasn't ready. The voice sent ice up her spine, freezing her in place. It always had that effect on her since he moved away.

She still loved him. She probably always would. But . . . Things were different now. They didn't belong together. Given the chance, she wasn't sure she would accept the opportunity.

Their meeting was strained.

Angel gave her a welcome hug. She closed her eyes and held him back. When they pulled back he stared at her for a long time.

"Buffy," he whispered.

She gave him a smile.

They talked, and that was nice. But she could see it in his eyes. His heart was totally consumed by her. It made her uncomfortable. He hadn't moved on, whereas she had.

"I'm cookie-dough," she blurted out.

"What?"

Ding, I'm done.

"Nothing, I'll explain it all later," she said.

Apparently it wasn't time for this conversation.

They parted ways. She saw the wrenching longing in Angel's eyes as he walked away. A stab of guilt jabbed her heart. She had no trouble saying goodbye.

Maybe she didn't love him the same way she used to after all.

Buffy didn't bother to pick up chicken on her way back.

"Hello?" she called as she let herself into the house.

"Buffy," Willow answered.

Confusion spread over Buffy. They weren't in the dining room this time. She headed to the living room.

"Hey."

Tara, Willow, and Dawn all sat on the sofa. Dawn glanced over.

"We didn't know when you'd get back. We decided to wait with a movie. But we haven't eaten yet," Dawn said, her face bright.

The gesture warmed Buffy. She looked down at her empty hands.

"I-I didn't pick up anything," she confessed. Damnit.

"That's all right," Tara quickly said. "S-Someone can go get something."

"I'll do it. How does chicken sound?" Buffy suggested.

"Fine, but I can go fetch it. You just got back." Willow said.

The red-head stood up. She headed to the door. Before leaving she gave Buffy a friendly squeeze.

"How'd it go?"

"Oh, uh . . . ya know. Intense. I don't really want to talk about it."

"Oh. Sure."

Buffy went into the living room. She plopped down next to her sister.

"Where's Giles?" the slayer asked.

Tara seemed surprised she would ask.

"I think Mr. Giles is at the magic shop helping Anya," the witch informed.

Buffy furrowed her brow.

"Okay."

Dawn shot Buffy a look. She shrugged.

The next day Buffy went out to apply for more jobs. She strolled down the street, in the direction of the clothing store. She tried to remember what was in style now as she neared.

Somebody bumped into her, drawing her out of her daze. She swayed. Some people could be so rude. She continued to the store.

The place was full of flares, shoes, and colorful tops. Buffy made her way to the service desk.

"Hi, can I-?"

All of a sudden things went hazy. There was a buzz.

"Miss? Miss?"

Buffy blinked. The clerk frowned at her.

"Can I help you?"

Buffy opened her mouth.

The buzz sounded again.

"Miss, I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

"I'm sorry," Buffy apologized.

She turned and exited the store. People on the sidewalk zoomed past.

"Those twerps!" Buffy exclaimed.

She searched her sweater. She took it off. Her finger came across a small metal dot on the sleeve. She snatched it up into her palm. The device abruptly disintegrated.

The world went back to normal.

Buffy stood there for a few moments. She came to a decision.

Those geeks needed to be stopped right away before they got out of hand.

Warren fell into a beanbag chair. "Okay, score me."

Jonathan pondered. "Rrrright. Fifty points for ingenuity, another thirty since it involved actual contact."

"Very smooth by the way," Andrew added.

A grin came to Warren's mouth.

"On the freak-o-meter she was at a zero, though," Jonathan said.

"Yeah, what's up with that?" Andrew questioned.

Just then the van door was ripped open. A very pissed-off slayer stood there. She had her arms crossed. Jonathan and Andrew squealed and cowered away.

The slayer!" Andrew cried. "She found us."

Jonathan just stared in fright.

"How'd you discover our evil deeds?" Andrew asked.

Buffy rolled her eyes. "You are so pathetic." She glanced around the van.

Warren stood up. His eyes were cold.

"Okay, come with me quietly and no one has to get hurt."

Jonathan reached over and grabbed his magic bone. Buffy entered the van and snatched it away.

"Hey!" the little man protested.

Buffy snapped the bone in two. She threw it back at Jonathan.

Andrew held up his hand, wooden pipes in his clutch. He began to bring them up to his lips. Buffy struggled with the nerd. Andrew bumped a button in his struggle. Star Wars music filtered into their ears. Again, Buffy stole one of their toys. She let the pipes drop and then smashed them with her heel.

"Ah!" Andrew shrieked.

Buffy grabbed both boys and pushed them out of the black van. She turned back to retrieve Warren. She was halted by a mist of green smoke. She coughed. She heard the screech of tires.

When the smoke cleared Warren and the van were long gone.

"He left us in the clutches of our arch nemesis!" Andrew yelled.

Jonathan shrunk back. "Are you going to hurt us?"

"Not if you cooperate," Buffy said.

She dragged them off toward her house.

Dawn entered the house. She stopped dead. Laughter spilled out of her. She doubled over, finding it hard to breath. Jonathan and Andrew were tied to the stair railing.

"The slayer's sister mocks us," Andrew said.

Dawn's laughter lessened. "I have a name. Dawn."

"Buffy!" Dawn shouted.

A few moments later Buffy came into view.

Dawn pointed to the nerd duo. "What's up with them?"

"I managed to catch them in the act. Warren got away." The last part was said with loathing.

"What are you going to do with them?"

Buffy shrugged. "Don't know yet."

"Can I torture them?" Dawn asked. She eyed the nerds crazily.

"Go ahead. But don't kill them."

"Do you mind watching them while I go out patrolling?" Buffy inquired.

"No problem. I'll keep them company."

Jonathan and Andrew didn't like the sound of that.

"Thanks, Dawnie."

"Life is stupid," Buffy complained. She tossed back a shot of alcohol.

Spike smiled.

The both sat in the crypt. A flask of whiskey was at arms length.

"I have a dim memory of that, yeah." Spike put his shot glass down. "And I didn't figure you were here cadging my whiskey 'cause life's all full of blood and peaches."

Buffy stared down at her half-full glass. "It's just . . . My life is messed up. I think I know how to fix it, but it is going to be hard. Like, for instance, money. I need a job. I've been applying everywhere but no job. My last alternative is The Doublemeat. And I so don't want to go there."

"That place'll kill ya," Spike commented.

"I know."

Buffy swallowed the last of her drink. She made a face and went 'blah'. Spike smiled at her cuteness.

"Give it a few days. You'll find something else. What you need is a night off. To forget your problems."

"What do you suggest?"

Smirking, Spike said," I'll show you a good time."

Buffy had promised herself not to get drunk. All she wanted was to feel a little tipsy. She failed. She was well into the slurred-speech and impaired judgment phase.

They entered Willy's bar, Buffy swaying on her feet. The place practically shook with loud rock music. It was crowded with drinking demons.

"Sss-pike," the bartender greeted. He had a forked tongue the slithered. Spike nodded to him in response.

"The usual, Dave, and one for the lady. We're headed for the back room, pet."

Buffy reached for the shot glass instead of the whole bottle this time. She got it down in one swallow. As she did, she scrunched up her features and let out 'ghah'.

Spike grabbed her arm. He led her toward the back. "This is where the real action is."

The pair came to a small room. There were shelves along the wall that held alcoholic cartons. A green-topped table stood next to the far end. Four demons played cards around it. One had many eyes, another had tentacles, the next had horns, and the last one had saggy skin.

Buffy's eyes widened at the loose-skinned demon. "Clem! Oh my gosh, it is so good to see you!"

Clem glanced up from the game. He gave Spike a weird look.

Buffy bit her lip, realizing her mistake. She attempted to cover it up. "Oh, um, Spike mentioned you."

Spike rose an eyebrow, but didn't say anything.

"You in, Spike?" the green-skinned demon with horns asked.

"Yeah. Count me in."

"He kills our kind, don't let him in," the many eyed thing said.

Spike hauled the demon up out of his seat and took his place.

Buffy crossed her arms. "Is this what you do every night? This isn't my idea of fun."

He ignored her.

The demons each produced a kitten, and placed it into a basket.

The slayer had had enough of this. She came over and knocked the basket over.

"Be free, kitties," she said. She dropped them to the floor.

The cats meowed and ran away.

"They're getting away," a demon hollered. He got up to chase them.

Buffy stormed out of the poker room. She was almost out of the bar when Spike grabbed her. She yanked out of his grasp.

"What's wrong, luv?"

"What's wrong!? You-You. . . Vampire! I can't believe I forgot how vampirish you could be!"

The tenderness vanished from Spike's face. "Sorry to disappoint you. But despite the fact that I trail after you and your mates, I am in fact a 'vampire'."

Her green eyes hardened. She gestured toward the back room. "I can't believe you brought me here. Whisky and poker are not romantic gestures."

Spike stared, stunned.

"I thought you would take me on a walk, or star gaze, or 'Something'. God, I miss the soul!"

She was hot, hot with anger and with alcohol. She didn't know what was spilling out of her mouth.

"What was that?" Spike asked.

Buffy shook her head. She turned and stomped off.

Giles handed Buffy a glass of water. She took it gratefully. She looked as if a train had smashed into her.

"Feel any better?" he asked in a soothing voice.

"I'm never doing that again," she said. "And I mean it this time."

"This time? . . . Wait, no, I don't want to know."

She gave him a small smile before setting the glass down on the bedside table. Then she sat on the bed. She grabbed the afghan off the bed and held it in her lap. Giles placed himself by her side.

A long sigh escaped Buffy. She fingered the fringe on afghan. "I'm going to get a job at the Doublemeat tomorrow," she whispered.

"Oh, Buffy . . . You should go easy on yourself. You're pushing yourself too hard."

"The nice people from the phone company think it isn't hard enough. Giles, I've made up my mind."

Just then the phone rang. The slayer instantly jumped up. She grabbed the phone. Giles watched his slayer talk softly into the phone. It was mostly 'uh huh, okay, and I see'.

"Really? That sounds great! Tomorrow is fine," Buffy practically squealed.

She slammed the phone back down in its cradle. She turned toward Giles. A huge grin was plastered on her face.

"I got a job!"

"Buffy, that is wonderful." He smiled.

"Yeah. I am now an official employee at the video store. I get free rentals and everything. Oh God, I have to go tell Dawn. She is going to freak."

With that, Buffy fled the room. Giles stood. He stared at the door for a moment, his smile faltering. He reached into his pocket and produced a check. He sighed and then tore it in half.

That's right. Giles doesn't want Buffy to rely on him, but he doesn't want to feel unneeded either. shakes head


	9. It's Party Time

REPLAY

**Chapter 9- It's Party Time**

Halloween. The one day out of the year when the real monsters slept, and the fake ones prowled. It was also supposedly the slayer's day . . . er night off. But Buffy unfortunately had another job to do. She was helping out at the Magic Box for a little extra cash.

The store hadn't been this busy since its grand opening. Buffy was exhausted, and that was saying a lot since she had super-strength. There wasn't a moment's pause between customers. She didn't remember it being so insane last time.

Anya skated past in her Farrah Fawcett costume.

"We're running low on mandrake root," Buffy said. "I'll check the basement."

"Good idea," Anya said. "Are you sure you don't want to consider a position here? You are doing a fabulous job."

Buffy shook her head. "No thanks."

She went over to the cellar entrance. She headed down. She reached the bottom of the stairs and turned. She jumped out of surprise when she spotted Spike.

"Ah! Don't do that! I need to get you a little bell collar," Buffy rambled. She laughed. She had forgotten that Spike would be there.

Spike gazed at her, expressionless.

Buffy's humor faltered. "What?"

"Thought you wouldn't be talking to me."

"Oh. Forget about last night. I was totally loopy." She motioned circles around her ear.

He eyed her with such intensity that it made her squirm.

She reached over and grabbed some vines. Then she handed them over. "Here. Burba weed, right?"

He narrowed his eyes.

She pulled back the vines. "That's why you came, isn't it? Goes good in blood?"

"How'd you know I liked burba weed?"

"I uh . . . "She faltered, lowering the burba weed.

He reached out and took the burba weed. Their fingers touched. She snatched her hand back, on fire from the contact.

"I know you were going to steal it. I'll give Anya the money. I'm working girl now so I can spare a few bucks."

Tilting his head, he studied her with curiosity. "Heard that, yeah. Why you'd lend me your good earned cash, though, I have no idea."

Buffy fumbled with her hands. "Maybe I like you."

A snort came from the vampire. Buffy lifted her head to meet his eyes. There must have been something in her expression because he became serious.

"Buffy?" Spike whispered.

The air crackled. This is it, Buffy thought. I should kiss him.

Just then the door above creaked.

"Buffy, we need that mandrake root!" Anya's voice shouted from up the stairs. "What is keeping you!?"

Buffy turned her head from Spike. She grabbed the jar of mandrake root.

"I better get this upstairs," she blurted.

Buffy rushed back into the store, her heart racing. Spike was left, watching her retreat in bafflement.

Everyone was pooped. Dawn closed the door and leaned against it.

"Okay, I was polite with the 'come agains', but really I hope they don't," the teen commented.

From his position on the floor, Xander grunted in agreement. Giles and Buffy sat nearby, and Willow and Tara sat in chairs at the table. They all looked about ready to pass out. Only Anya, at the register, was cheery and upbeat. She grinned hugely and opened the drawer to count the money.

"That was the most incredible thing I have ever experienced," she exclaimed.

Xander lifted himself slightly up to give her a look.

"Except for that," she told him.

Dawn made her way over to Anya.

"What you all did for me tonight ... the astounding heaps of money you helped me ...us acquire. All I can say is, I hope we make as much tomorrow."

Buffy raised her hand. "Can't. I start at Video Haven tomorrow."

"Oh." Anya frowned. She surveyed the group. "But the rest of you are free for the post-holiday sale, right?"

There were moans in response.

Anya beamed. "Good."

Giles grimaced. He got to his feet. "Brooms all around, then."

"Or I could whip up a jaunty self-cleaning incantation, it'll be like _Fantasia_," Willow offered.

"Will, I don't think-"Buffy began.

"We all know how splendidly that turned out for Mickey," Giles remarked.

"I think I'm a little more adept than a cartoon mouse," Willow said.

"And you have more fingers, which is good, 'cause ...there's no need to wear those big white gloves to overcompensate," Tara said.

The two girls smiled at each other.

Anya and Dawn caught everyone's attention. The capitalist was teaching Dawn how to do her 'happy dance'. They waved the bills around, turning clockwise around.

"This is fun," said Dawn.

"A perfect end to a perfect day," said Anya.

Xander was completely transfixed by the ex-demon. "I'm going to marry that girl," he muttered.

His words perked Buffy up. She turned toward him. "Is there something we don't know?"

Standing up, Xander announced, "Hey, everybody, can I um . . . there's something Anya and I . . . wanna tell you."

Dawn stopped her dance. She shot Buffy a smile, which her sister returned.

Xander walked over to the counter. Anya stepped up to his side.

"Now?" she asked.

"Now," he confirmed.

He wrapped his arm around her. "We're getting married."

A squeal escaped Dawn.

Buffy jumped up.

"Congratulations!" Tara shouted.

Willow blinked. "That's . . . That's wow."

"It's a big wow," Xander said.

"I thought you were waiting for the right moment," Anya told Xander.

He squeezed her. "I did."

The couple kissed. Buffy's eyes misted at the sight. She reminded herself that this time this was for real. Anya and Xander were going to get married.

Anya giggled as her and Xander parted. She tossed the money into the air.

"Here, have some money!" Anya exclaimed.

Dawn snatched some dollars that floated her way.

Giles removed his glasses. He began to clean the lenses. Buffy frowned.

"Giles, quit. It isn't that bad," Buffy whispered.

"We have to do something for them," Buffy went on, louder.

About an hour later Buffy scolded herself for not grabbing decorations on the way home. How stupid could she get?

"This is just the first premarital celebration. There'll be lots more. With gifts," Anya said.

"Sure, maybe we'll even have time to decorate for the next one," Tara replied.

Before Buffy could react Willow had done it. In one wave of her hand there were streamers and paper lanterns. Buffy could have slapped herself.

"This is so much better than the way it usually looks. Thank you," Anya burst out. She gave Willow a hug.

Giles, Tara, Buffy, and Dawn all shared a disturbed look.

The party continued. Buffy spent the time off to the side. She watched Willow closely. The girl didn't have any idea about the repercussions of her actions. When she saw Tara head into the kitchen she followed.

The witch poured herself a cup of soda. Then she glanced up at Buffy, surprised.

"Tara," Buffy said, "I'm worried about Willow."

Tara set her cup down. "I-I thought I was the only one."

"We have to talk to her."

Tara nodded. "I was planning on it."

"If it's all right I'd like to back you up. She might listen more if we both confront her."

"Th-That sounds good."

They didn't even have to leave the room. Willow came in shortly after. She grinned at them, grabbing a bag of snacks.

"Hey, guys," she greeted.

"Will, why don't you sit down," Buffy suggested.

Willow stopped. She glanced from her best friend to her girlfriend. A frown appeared on her lips.

"Why the serious faces?" she asked.

"We're concerned," Tara said.

"What?"

"You're using too much magic, Wills," Buffy said. "It's okay to use it for important stuff, but –"

"This was important!" Willow interrupted. "How can you say Xander and Anya's party isn't important?"

Buffy's eyes widened. This wasn't going well.

"That's not what she meant," Tara told Willow.

"I can't believe you guys are ganging up on me," Willow said. Her face hardened.

"We're not ganging up on you," Tara said.

"It sure sounds like it."

Buffy took a step toward the red-head. "All we're saying is that you should stop relying on the magics when you don't need to."

"Yeah," agreed Tara. "One of us could have gone out to pick up some decorations."

"Why bother? These are perfect. And extra biodegradable-y. In a couple of hours, poof!" Willow informed.

"No, they're, they're great, it's just ... why use magic when you can do something naturally?"

"Well, you can fight monsters naturally, with sticks and stones. Don't recommend it though."

'I statements', Buffy thought. She remembered 'I statements' from school. There were better results when you used them. She looked over at Tara. In this situation it would be a 'We statement'.

"We're getting off the subject," Buffy intervened. "We only feel . . . We love you, and we don't want you to do something that could hurt yourself or others."

Willow's eyes burned with fire. "How are pretty decorations going to hurt someone?"

"That's not what she meant and you know it!" Tara yelled.

Willow shook her head. "I can't believe this." Her gaze fell on Buffy. "You weren't complaining about my power when I was your 'big gun'."

"That was different," Buffy said.

Silence fell over the kitchen. Willow suddenly turned. She stormed out of the kitchen. Tara hurried after her.

"Will, wait!" the other witch shouted.

Buffy followed.

Willow stormed into the living room. She swiped the air, making the decorations vanish. Then she spun around to face Buffy and Tara.

"Are you happy now?" she snapped.

Opening her mouth, Buffy wasn't quite sure what to say.

Willow fled the house. She banged the door on her way out.

Giles took his glasses off. Xander stared at the door with worry. Dawn looked ready to cry.

Anya eyed them all. "Anyone want to dance?"

Buffy shook her head.

"I have to go after her," Tara said.

So much for changing the past, Buffy thought. She had a feeling she just might have made things worse.


	10. Differences and Resemblance

REPLAY

**Chapter 10- Differences and Resemblance**

Jonathan and Andrew beat the basement door to death. They could hear the upbeat party music and chatter.

"This is cruel and unusual punishment!" hollered Andrew.

The door flung open. Dawn stood there. Both boys jumped back. They were both frightened of her, remembering their time alone together. She was one disturbed girl to make them watch _Space Balls_ (AN- This is a movie making fun of Star Wars. It is hilarious. If you haven't seen it, do)_. _Oh the horror of someone mocking the greatest film ever made.

Dawn glared. "Buffy told me that you could come up for awhile. But you have to behave yourself."

"We promise," said Jonathan.

"Yes, scout's honor," Andrew said.

She rolled her eyes and let them pass into the kitchen.

Andrew noticed the food immediately. "Ooo, pretzels!"

Dawn traveled back into the living room. She went up to her sister.

"They're in the kitchen. I don't think we have to worry about them escaping. They're transfixed by the food," the teen said.

Buffy smiled.

"So, I think I should get a move on."

"Good idea."

The two had made a plan last night. Dawn would go out with Janice and the two vampires. She would act normally. Later Buffy would show up with Spike and dust the unsuspecting pair, plus their friends.

Dawn told Xander and Anya goodbye before leaving.

Buffy saw Xander panic from all the attention. The baby remark was his breaking point. She followed him out to the front porch.

He fanned himself with his pirate hat.

"Air. Sweet mother of oxygen," he remarked.

"You okay?" the slayer asked.

"Yeah. I just ... it's just, I didn't think it would be so much."

Buffy touched his arm. "Too much too fast?"

"Exactly."

"Maybe you should talk to Anya about it. Slow things down a bit."

Xander seemed thoughtful. "But you saw her in there. She's so happy. I don't want to ruin that."

Buffy removed her arm. She didn't want to ruin it either. But she knew the outcome would be complete horror if things went on this way.

"Just . . . If you have worries don't keep them inside, kay?"

After a moment of hesitation he nodded. "Thanks, Buff."

She hugged him. "I'm sure you'll have a happy ending. No need to call upon the happy demon."

"What?"

"Nothing. Just have faith in your love. Now go back in there and wallow in the delight."

"Okay."

She smiled. "I'm going to go see if Spike is up for a patrol. Gotta be something out there cruisin' for a smackdown."

Xander stopped. He turned. "You've been spending an awful lot of time with the bleached one lately."

Buffy froze. She hadn't been expecting that. She replayed her encounters with Spike. They were equal to the ones before.

"Spike can be useful to have around," she said.

Xander paused. "Right, with the muscle. . . Just, uh . . . Nevermind. You go find yourself something large and slimy to beat the crap out of."

Buffy watched him head back inside. Could it be that Xander had noticed her warm fuzzies for Spike? She wrapped her arms around herself. So what if he had? It didn't change anything. She'd face her friend's wrath if necessary.

She hurried to Spike's crypt. She considered knocking, but ended up bursting in instead. She surveyed the darkened tomb. The television was on, displaying an old black and white movie.

"Spike, we've got trouble," she called. "Spike?"

He was nowhere to be seen.

"You know . . ."

She spun around. She came face-to-face with the vampire.

"...in civilized cultures, that's called trespassing."

She recalled this conversation. Her reply was too good of a one to let go.

"Good thing you're uncivilized. We have to go."

"Giles found you?"

"He was looking for me?"

"Yeah, it's Dawn."

"Is she missing?" Buffy asked.

"Right. Dawn and her little friend pulled a Houdini. Up to a bit of candy-corn mischief, I suspect," he said.

"Well we have to go look for her," Buffy declared.

Buffy started to walk off.

"I did a sweep of the tunnels, Giles is poking about the cemetery," Spike said, coming up behind her.

It wasn't hard for Dawn to convince Janice and the vampires to go straight to the forest instead of the innocent Old Man Kaltenbach's house. All it took was a few flirty gestures with Justin. Then she made the suggestion of splitting up into pairs to have some 'quality time alone'.

When Dawn was left with Justin in the car, she didn't wait long. He leaned in to kiss her.

"Shhh. I just wanna taste you," he muttered.

She gripped her wooden stake with a shaky hand. There were tears in her eyes. She really liked Justin. If only she had met him before he had been turned. They could have hit it off.

The vampire leaned forward. She mouthed 'I'm sorry' before thrusting her weapon into his chest. An astonished looked passed over his features, and then she was showered with dust.

It took her a few moments to compose herself. She jumped out of the car.

"Janice!" she shouted.

She ran.

She found Janice, holding her neck. A dazed expression was on her face, and her gaze was directed down a small hill.

"Janice?" Dawn said.

Janice didn't even acknowledge her arrival. Dawn followed her eyes to see Giles. The watcher tackled Zack to the ground.

"Giles!" Dawn shouted. She tossed her stake toward him.

Giles lifted his head. The stake landed in the grass, near him. He grabbed it and imbedded the wood into Zack's heart.

"This way!" Buffy yelled.

She didn't bother looking back. She was certain Spike followed behind.

They came to a clearing. Vampires surrounded Dawn and Giles. Buffy acted instantly. She grabbed a vamp and staked him.

"If anyone is here just to make out I suggest you run."

Two humans took her advice.

She kicked another vampire in the stomach.

"You scream."

After staking her second vamp, a third rushed at her. She quickly opened the car door to block his advance. He punched at her, shattering the car window. Buffy hauled him through the window. She slammed the door on his head. His body disintegrated.

"Who's next?"

Xander and Anya stood, ready to leave.

"Sorry about the party," Buffy apologized.

"Nah, don't worry about it," Xander said. "Seeing Andrew and Jonathan dance the chicken dance together was a hoot."

She cracked a smile. "Sorry I missed it."

"It gave me more time to plan the bridal shower," Anya said. "Where do we order obscenely muscular male strippers?"

"Anya," Xander said.

"Well, I'm kidding, geez."

Before exiting Anya mouthed 'We'll talk'.

Spike came up behind Buffy. A shiver ran down her back at his close proximity.

"Guess I should bugger off. Something about big bads not venturing far from their crypts on Halloween."

"Goodbye, Spike," she said.

He nodded and left.

"We've decided to be good," Jonathan said.

Buffy blinked.

"Yeah, we're like The Shadow, turning a new leaf and all. I'm talking about the movie since I never –"

Buffy held up her hand for him to stop.

"We owe you," Jonathan went on. "Well I owe you. You saved my life a bunch of times. And just between you and me, I never liked Warren that much anyway."

A dark frown crossed Andrew's face. He crossed his arms. "He thought he was so better than us. And then he left us when we needed him the most."

Buffy just stared.

"So, uh, Buffy . . ." Jonathan said. "Can we . . . uh, maybe . . . hide out here for awhile?"

"You're still my prisoners, remember? Until you demonstrate change I'm not letting you leave," Buffy said.

"Hey!" protested Jonathan. "That's so unfair!"

"You wanted to stay anyway," Buffy said.

"But that's not the point!" proclaimed Andrew.

Buffy snatched their arms and dragged them toward the basement. She could only take so much of them. She shoved them into the basement.

"Keep yourself company."

The door burst open. Willow ran in, going up the stairs. A moment later Tara stepped in. Her eyes were bloodshot.

"Tara?" Buffy questioned. She reached out a hand.

Tara sighed. "She just won't-won't listen."

Buffy stared up the stairs. "She doesn't realize how deep she's gotten into her power. It's controlling her."

"Can I sleep in your room tonight? I'll make a space on the floor."

"Of course."

Dawn made a list.

get Spike and Buffy together

keep Willow from going all black

keep Giles here

help Anya and Xander's relationship

prevent the bathroom scene

stop Warren

help Amy

stop Rack

Was that it?

She put Sweet down and then crossed it out. They wouldn't have to worry about him. Xander had called upon him because things were so messed up before. He wouldn't do it again.

Would he?

Xander fingered the shiny necklace. He contemplates the talisman.

"Xander, honey, come back to bed!" Anya called from the bedroom.

He stuffed the talisman back into his pocket. He turned to go to his fiancé. He didn't need any spell for a happy future.

Trust in your love. Isn't that what Buffy had said? She was right.

The phone rang. Xander turned to answer it. He listened to the person on the other end.

"Will, slow down, I can't understand you."

All he got as a reply was a bunch of sobs.

"It's okay, Willow, go ahead and let it out."

Xander reached into his pocket and brought out the talisman again.

Foreshadowing. Up next, you got it, Once More With Feeling! My version. A better version. And you got it, full of Spuffy.


	11. Once MORE with Feeling

REPLAY

The songs selected were picked by their lyrics. I did not take account for the genre they fall under.

Note- I changed a few words in some songs so that it went with the Scooby's situation. You will know because I have the original lyrics in parenthesis.

Song credits:

State of Mind by Merril Bainbridge- Buffy

Boy Like That by Selena- Xander and Giles

Everybody's Talkin My Baby Down by Celine Dion- Buffy

You Don't See Me by Josie and the Pussycats- Spike

Oh, and the song Anya mentioned to singing is Money (That's What I Want). It is sung by Josie and the Pussycats. I think it might be sung by someone else too, but I don't know who.

This is only the first part of Once More With Feeling. Everybody gets to sing. Except Dawn, because she doesn't have much going on in her life.

Chapter 11- Once MORE with Feeling

Buffy made her way through the cemetery. Her body was on patrol, but her mind was somewhere else. It was preoccupied with worries. She evoked everything that had happened since she arrived in the past. There had been slight differences, yet mostly everything was repeating itself.

Could she really pull this off?

All of a sudden the slayer felt something pass through her. It was like a bolt of energy. She paused for a second before opening her mouth and letting out a tune. It wasn't happy or sad, just contemplative.

BUFFY

_Where do I go from here_

_Or am I just like a clock spinning round_

_Everything seems unclear_

_Confusion is raising its head_

_And I can't make a sound_

A vampire came out from behind a tombstone. He rushed at Buffy. She spun him around with agility. Then she reached into her pocket and produced a stake. She rammed the piece of wood into his heart. He crumbled before her.

BUFFY

_I feel it _

_Tearing at my soul while I'm asleep _

_I feel it _

_Driving me to something I'll regret_

Buffy switched direction. Two vampires and a demon came into view. They stood near a tree. A man struggled against binding that kept him against the trunk. She quickly eliminated the vampires. They were the easiest. Then she went for the demon. He looked old. His skin was gray and wrinkly. He even had a beard and gray hair. He smelled musty, kind of like Giles's archaic collection of books. He went down with little trouble. She stepped over his body and continued to sing.

BUFFY

_What if I make the change_

_What if I loose all my courage this time_

Buffy used her sword to cut the captive down. He thanked her over and over. She smiled before walking off.

BUFFY

_Everything seems so strange_

_Try but I can't seem to make a decision that's right _

_I feel it _

_Pounding like a drum inside my brain_

_I feel it _

_If it doesn't stop I'll go insane_

Another vamp charged her. She threw her sword aside, grabbing her stake instead.

BUFFY

_I feel it_

_Tearing at my soul while I'm asleep_

_I feel it _

_Driving me to something I'll regret_

_I feel it _

_Pounding like a drum inside my brain_

_I feel it_

_I feel it _

_If it doesn't stop I'll go insane_

The foe was no more.

BUFFY

_I feel it_

_I feel it_

_I feel it_

_I feel it_

_I feel it_

Her last few lines were sang with eyes staring off into the night. When she finished she bowed her head.

Buffy rushed into the store first thing the next morning.

"Giles!" she called. "We've got a problem!"

The watcher stepped forward. He held an open book.

"What may that be?" Giles questioned.

"Singing," Buffy said, breathless.

"S-singing always makes me happy," Tara said.

Buffy's eyes fell on Tara. The witch sat at the table. The seat next to her was empty.

"Where's Willow?" Buffy asked.

Tara looked down. "She didn't come. Sh-She said – She had other plans."

That didn't settle right in Buffy's stomach. Willow had never been this mad before.

Xander held up a donut in each hand. "Respect the cruller. And tame the donut!"

"That's still funny, sweetie," Anya expressed.

Giles came over and grabbed a donut. He took a bite. A pleased look passed his face. It must have been jelly filled.

Buffy directed her gaze on Xander. "Did you summon a dancing and singing demon?"

Xander almost choked on his donut. "Wh-What? No!"

Taking that in, Buffy scrunched up her nose in confusion. "Then who did?"

She sunk in the empty chair next to Tara.

"Buffy, what makes you think this is a demon at work?" Giles asked.

"It makes sense. Badness in Sunnydale always means demon-y activity."

Giles nodded.

Buffy took a donut. She frowned, noticing there were no more jelly. She had to settle for chocolate.

"I'm not the only one, right? I mean, you guys sang too?"

Xander almost dropped his donut. "Merciful Zeus!"

Anya stepped out from behind the register. "The best things in life are free. But you can keep them for the birds and bees. Give me money, that's what I want," she sang.

Everyone raised their heads.

"Relax," Anya said. "I'm just recapping the number I did this morning when I opened up the shop."

Her fiancé cracked a grin. "Very fitting."

"I thought so," Anya commented.

"Well, I sang but I had my guitar at the hotel..." Giles said.

"It was bizarre. We were talking and then it was like-, "Tara said.

"We have to do something about this," Buffy said. She turned to Giles.

Giles swallowed the last of his donut. He cleared his throat. "We'll start researching immediately."

Buffy stood up. "I'll visit Spike. He has contacts."

Xander squirmed in his seat.

"Very well," Giles said.

Before Buffy could exit the store she was stopped by her male best friend. He clamped down on her shoulder and spun her around.

"What is going on with you and Spike?" he whispered.

Buffy blinked. "Nothing. Why would there be –?"

"I'm not dumb. I've seen you two. You've been all moon-eyed toward him."

Buffy's mouth hung open.

Xander let go of her. He stared at her for a moment. Then he began to sing.

XANDER

_A boy like that, a boy like that _

_A boy like that, like that _

_A boy like that _

_Like that_

_A boy like that, like that_

Buffy's green eyes widened with shock.

Xander turned to face the rest of the gang.

XANDER

_A boy like that who'd kill another slayer (your brother)_

_Forget that boy and find another _

_One of your own kind, stick to your own kind _

_A boy like that _

_Like that_

_A boy like that will give you sorrow _

_You'll need another boy tomorrow _

_One of your own kind, stick to your own kind _

_A boy like that _

_A boy like that_

_A boy who kills cannot love _

_A boy who kills has no heart _

_And he's the boy who gets your love _

_And gets your heart? _

_Very smart, Buffy, very smart (Very smart, Maria, very smart)_

Giles jumped out of his chair. He decided to join in.

GILES

_A boy like that wants one thing only _

_And when he's gone he'll leave you lonely_

_He'll murder your love, his kind murdered mine (He'll murder your love, he murdered mine) _

_Just wait and see, wait and see_

_A boy who kills cannot love_

_A boy who kills has no heart_

_And he's the boy who gets your love _

_And gets your heart? _

_Very smart, Buffy, very smart (Very smart, Maria, very smart)_

GILES AND XANDER

_A boy like that, a boy like that _

_Kill your sister slayer (Kill your brother) _

_A boy like that, a boy like that _

_Find another _

_Girl, you've gotta know _

_Murder your love _

_Girl, you've gotta know _

_Like that, like that _

GILES

_A boy like that wants one thing only _

_And when he's done he'll leave you lonely _

_He'll murder your love, his kind murdered mine (He'll murder your love, he murdered mine) _

_That's right_

_A boy like that, a boy like that_

_A boy like that, a boy like that_

Xander stepped up onto a chair. He began to sing Spanish. His expression displayed puzzlement as to the fluency of the language.

XANDER

_Un__ hombre asi matara a tu hermano _

_Encuentra__ alquien que es como tu _

_Un__ muchacho asi te dara tristeza _

_Cuando__ termina te deja sola, triste y sola _

_A boy like that wants one thing only _

_He will leave you sad and lonely, sad and lonely _

_Un__ muchacho asi te dara tristeza _

_Un__ muchacho asi matara _

_Un__ muchacho asi te dara tristeza _

_Un__ muchacho asi matara a tu hermano _

_Un__ muchacho asi te dara tristeza _

_Un__ muchacho asi te amtara _

_Un__ muchacho asi matara a tu hermano _

_Un__ muchacho asi te dara tristeza _

_Un__ muchacho asi te dara tristeza_

GILES AND XANDER

_A boy like that, a boy like that_

_A boy like that, a boy like that_

_Wants one thing only_

_A boy like that, a boy like that_

_A boy like that, a boy like that_

_Leave you sad and lonely_

_A boy like that, a boy like that_

_A boy like that, a boy like that_

_Wants one thing only_

_A boy like that, a boy like that_

_A boy like that, a boy like that_

_Leave you sad and lonely_

_A boy like that, a boy like that_

_A boy like that, a boy like that_

_Kill your sister slayer (your brother)_

_Find you another_

_One of your own kind_

_A boy like that, a boy like that_

_A boy like that, a boy like that_

_Like that_

The invisible music got softer and softer until it vanished completely. Giles and Xander froze, stunned. The shop fell into silence. Tara recovered first.

"Wow," Tara murmured.

Buffy scanned the room. Her features were hardened. After a moment she left The Magic Box.

She strolled down the sunny street. People passed her. As they did she got the eerie feeling that they were watching her. Maybe out of pity. She wrapped her arms around her slim form.

A sigh escaped her lips.

BUFFY

_People are sayin' _

_That boy is gonna hurt you _

_His kind of love is not for real _

_He's only playin' _

_Foolin__' with your heart girl _

_But I know how he makes me feel _

_And I don't need any other proof _

_They just don't understand _

_They don't know the truth_

She glanced up at the clear blue sky. Somewhere background singers and joined her.

BUFFY

_Momma said he's bad for me (Momma says he's bad for me) _

_Poppa says I'll be sorry _

_Everybody's talkin' my baby down _

_And all my friends doubt him _

_Tell me I should live without him _

_Everybody's talkin' my baby down_

She continued to walk.

BUFFY

_He's not like the others _

_Nobody wants to see it _

_They don't even wanna try _

_Judge a book by its cover _

_And you'll never know the story _

_There's so much more than meets the eye _

_Oh and I know his heart is true _

_I don't need anyone _

_To tell me what to do_

_Momma said he's bad for me (Momma says he's bad for me) _

_Poppa says I'll be sorry _

_Everybody's talkin' my baby down _

_And all my friends doubt him _

_Tell me I should live without him _

_Everybody's talkin' my baby down_

_My sister is the only one who doesn't (My sisters and my brothers) _

_Tell me I should find another _

_Everybody's talkin' my baby down_

Buffy became more emotional.

BUFFY

_Oh but they can't feel his touch _

_They can't feel his kiss _

_They don't know what it's like to be loved like this _

_I don't care about their point of view _

_'Cause it's understood _

_When the love is good _

_Nothin__' else is gonna do_

_Momma said he's bad for me (Momma says he's bad for me) _

_Poppa says I'll be sorry _

_Everybody's talkin' my baby down _

_And all my friends doubt him _

_Tell me I should live without him _

_Everybody's talkin' my baby down_

_No they don't know what he's all about _

_Everybody's just wanna talk my baby down _

_No they can't see that his heart is gold _

_Everybody wanna treat my baby so cold, so cold_

She repeated the chorus one more time before ending the song.

Spike was trying to sleep. Unsuccessfully.

Every time he closed his eyes he'd see her. She was haunting him day and night. Her memory wouldn't give him a moment's rest. He could see her, feel her, and taste her. There was nothing he could do about it. Nothing worked.

He groaned. His head hurt. He glanced down at the empty liquor bottle he had tossed to the stone floor. He'd drunk too much.

The sound of his crypt door creaking open made him spring into a sitting position. His nostrils flared. He was surprised that the slayer would appear during the day.

"Buffy," he said.

She stepped into view. "That's me."

He hopped down from his sarcophagus. He noticed her eyes roam over his shirtless chest.

"Do you know what is going on?" Buffy asked.

"Well, I've seen some damn funny things in the last two days. A 600 pound Chirago demon making like Yma Sumac, that one will stay with you. I remain immune, happy to say," he remarked.

"So you know about the song and dance numbers? Could you scout around the demon world? Ask about a demon named Sweet?"

Spike kicked the empty alcohol bottle. "Sweet, huh?"

"Yeah. He has to be summoned with a talisman. Somebody, who remains anonymous, brought him here."

The vampire nodded. "I'll beat up some lowlifes, see if I can get the scoop."

Buffy smiled sweetly. "Thanks."

Spike turned away. "Right then. It's time for you to scamper off again."

He could feel her behind him. A shiver ran down his spine.

"What?"

"I've given you your info. Isn't that why you came? To pump me for information?"

"Maybe I came to pump you for something else."

She said it teasingly. He spun around angrily.

"Don't play games!" he snapped.

She gaped. "Sorry, I didn't mean . . . You're all moody. Why? Did I do something? "

"Not a thing." His reply was too quick. "Glad you could stop by."

She inched toward him. "Spike?"

"It's nothing," he said defensively.

He went to show her to the door, but then remembered it was daylight out. He stopped short.

SPIKE

_This is the place where I sit_

_This is the part where_

_I love you too much_

_Is this as hard as it gets?_

_'Cause I'm getting tired_

_Of pretending I'm tough_

_I'm here if you want me_

_I'm yours, you can hold me_

_I'm empty and taken and_

_Tumbling and breakin'_

_'Cause you don't see me_

_And you don't need me_

_And you don't love me_

_The way I wish you would_

_The way I know you could_

His head tilted, taking her in. She watched him with curiosity.

SPIKE

_I dream of worlds_

_Where you'd understand_

_And I dream a_

_Million sleepless days (nights)_

_I dream of fire when_

_You're touching my hand_

_But it twists into smoke_

_When I turn on the light_

_I'm speechless and faded _

_It's too complicated_

_Is this how the book ends,_

_Nothing but good friends?___

Spike's face had softened. His eyes blurred and he fought back the tears.

SPIKE

_'Cause you don't see me_

_And you don't need me_

_And you don't love me_

_The way I wish you would_

He put a hand to his heart.

SPIKE

_This is the place in my heart_

_This is the place where_

_I'm falling apart_

_Isn't this just where we met?_

_And is this the last chance_

_That I'll ever get?_

_I wish I was lonely_

_Instead of just only_

_Crystal and see-through_

_And not enough to you_

Buffy came even closer. He could sense her warm breath as she leaned toward him.

SPIKE

_'Cause you don't see me_

_And you don't need me_

_And you don't love me_

_The way I wish you would_

_'Cause you don't see me_

_And you don't need me_

_And you don't love me_

_The way I wish you would_

_The way I know you could_

Buffy cupped his well defined cheek. She smiled.

"Yes I do," she whispered.

And then she kissed him.

It was a different kind of kiss than he ever experienced. His mother had pecked him on the cheek and forehead. Her action had been about unconditional caring. Drusilla's kiss had been about possession and power. It was rough and needy. And Angelus . . . The thought soured his stomach. Angelus had kissed him before on the forehead, saying "Spike, my boy-". It was mocking, showing his ignorance and who was boss. Harmony, well Harmony had been about physical attraction.

This was. . . There was only one word to describe it. Magical. He had always been down on the magics. But this wasn't a spell. A stab of doubt hit him. Was it? No. Buffy was too real. This wasn't a spell, but there was magic between them anyway. It crackled as their mouths met.

He remembered the time she had rewarded him after his beating by Glory. That had been a display of gratitude and trust. But this . . . This was full of . . .

Love?

It felt like it. There was feeling in it. Her lips were soft, like satin . . . no, silk. Chocolate. Better than chocolate.

His brain rambled on and on as her tongue invaded his mouth. His arms brought her closer, and her fingers played with his hair, mussing his bleached locks the way she found sexy.

Spike was lost. Lost in an eternity of Buffy. He had said he was drowning in her. He had been wrong. He hadn't dived into her sea until then. He had said all they did was dance. They hadn't danced until then.

When they pulled apart things were out of focus. Despite his lack of temperature he felt the cold. Buffy must have felt it too, fore she snatched him back to kiss him again.

Wow. Wow. I've never dragged a kiss out that long. Wow. I'm amazed at myself. And very satisfied. Hope you feel the same way.


	12. Once AGAIN with Feeling

REPLAY

The songs selected were picked by their lyrics. I did not take account for the genre they fall under.

Note- I changed a few words in some songs so that it went with the Scooby's situation. You will know because I have the original lyrics in parenthesis.

Song credits:

That's what Love is For by Amy Grant- Tara and Willow

I'll Be There by Maria Carey- Xander and Anya

Never Gonna Say I'm Sorry by Ace of Base- Andrew and Jonathan

Heaven by Live- Giles

If You Could Only See by Tonic- Buffy

Right Kind of Wrong by LeAnn Rimes- Buffy

**Chapter 12- Once AGAIN with Feeling**

Buffy licked her lips and grinned. Lips of Spike. Yummy.

"Meet up tonight for a meeting?" she asked.

"Got it, pet. I'll be there," he said.

She gave him a quicker kiss before leaving.

Spike stood behind, glowing. He had never known the true meaning of effulgent until then.

Tara decided to search for Willow. The red-head was a whiz on the computer and might be able to find out something about this singing extravaganza. That was the practical reason anyway, and Tara tried to be practical. But another part of her, (if she were going to be honest) a larger part, wanted to find her girlfriend to make up. With kisses, hugs, and snugglies would be nice.

She checked at the library, the park, and the Bronze before going home. It was back at the house that she founded her. Willow sat at the dining room table, her laptop in front of her, shut and turned off. Her posture was slumped, as if defeated. She looked tired.

"Willow?" Tara prompted.

Willow jumped. Her head swung to the side. "Oh, Tara," Willow whispered. And that was when she began to cry.

Tara could never bear to see her girl cry. She immediately came forward and enveloped Willow in her arms. She stroked her hair and made shushing noises.

"I'm sorry," Willow choked through her tears. "I'll try not to use magic so much."

"It's okay, baby," Tara whispered.

Willow lifted her gaze to meet Tara's.

"You forgive me?"

Tara nodded.

"I can't stand not to be around you," Willow went on, her voice wavering.

The blonde's lips lifted. Her eyes twinkled. She took both of Willow's hands and placed a kiss on them.

TARA

_Sometimes we make it harder than it is  
We'll take a perfect night  
And fill it up with words we don't mean  
Dark sides best unseen  
And we wonder why we're feeling this way.  
  
Sometimes I wonder if we really feel the same  
Why we can be unkind  
Questioning the strongest of hearts  
That's when we must start  
Believing in the one thing that has gotten us this far_

Willow wiped her eyes. She gave a little smile.

WILLOW

_That's what love is for  
To help us through it  
That's what love is for  
Nothing else can do it_

Standing up, Tara pulled Willow along with her.

TARA

_Melt our defenses  
Bring us back to our senses  
Give us strength to try once more  
Baby, that's what love is for_

_Sometimes I see you  
And you don't know I am there  
And I'm washed away by emotions  
I hold deep down inside  
Getting stronger with time  
It's living through the fire  
And holding on we find  
  
Believing in the one thing  
That has gotten us this far  
That's what love is for  
To help us through it  
That's what love is for  
Nothing else can do it_

Complete adoration had spread over Willow. It seemed as if she believed she could fly.

WILLOW

_Round off the edges  
Talk us down from the ledges  
Give us strength to try once more_

TARA AND WILLOW

_Baby, that's what love is for  
That's what love is for_

The two inched closer. Their lips brushed together in a tender kiss. Suddenly Willow squealed, breaking away.

"Tara, I can't feel the ground!"

Tara glanced down. Her eyes got big. They were both floating off the ground. She kicked her feet in the air and began to giggle. Her companion joined in with the glee. It didn't look like they would be coming down to earth for a long while.

Xander had been awake for who knows how long. He had just lay there, watching his beautiful fiancé sleep. He couldn't imagine his life without her. She made him a better person.

_Believe in your love and everything will be okay_. It kept echoing through his head. The words gave him strength and hope.

The bed moved slightly and he heard a small moan. Anya was waking up.

"You want some breakfast, baby?" Xander asked.

Sleepily, Anya opened her eyes. She studied his face.

"You don't have to go to work?" she asked.

"Nah, I shut the crew down for the day. My guys start dancing around me, I don't know if I can deal. It's a flab thing. So, waffles?"

"Will you still make me waffles when we're married?"

"No, I'll only make them for myself, but by California law, you will own half of them," he joked. He leaned over and gave her a kiss. "Hey, how about omelets? I could do an omelet."

Anya stretched. "Sure, honey, that sounds great."

Xander got out of bed. He went to fetch a skillet.

"Toast?"

"Mmm hmm."

Xander started work on their two-egg omelets. He opened the fridge and grabbed the cheese slices. Before shutting the door he made a face at her weird green chunks.

"Will it always be like this?"

Her question caught him off guard.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"Even when I'm old and wrinkly? Will we still wake up and have breakfast together? Will we always be together?"

He turned away from the stove. His eyes glazed.

XANDER

_You and I must make a pack  
We must bring salvation back  
Where there is love  
I'll be there  
I'll reach out my hand to you  
I'll have faith in all you do  
Just call my name  
And I'll be there_

Anya jumped to her feet. She hurried to his side.

XANDER AND ANYA

_I'll be there to comfort you  
Build my world of dreams around you  
I'm so glad that I found you  
I'll be there with a love that's strong  
I'll be your strength  
I'll keep holding on_

With that, he grabbed her hand and squeezed it.

XANDER

_Let me fill your heart with joy and laughter  
Togetherness is all I'm after  
Whenever you need me  
I'll be there_

A huge grin formed on Anya's face.

XANDER

_I'll be there to protect you  
With an unselfish love  
I'll respect you  
Just call my name  
And I'll be there_

ANYA

_If you should ever find someone new  
I know she'd better be good to you  
'Cos if she doesn't  
I'll be there_

Xander cupped the side of Anya's face. "How can you even question what we have?"

She grabbed the front of his robe. They stumbled back into the table.

"I'm not hungry for omelets anymore," she whispered.

Dawn had geek duty. They sat around the dining table, Monopoly between them. Dawn was actually enjoying the game since she was winning.

"Pay up," Dawn demanded Andrew as he landed on a railroad.

He whined. "You own everything!"

She gave him an evil grin. She snatched the paper money with greed.

"Why couldn't we have played D & D? I'm good at that," Andrew complained.

"Yuck. That is the dorkiest game ever," the teen said.

Jonathan crossed his arms. He sulked in his chair. "I'm good at video games. Too bad you don't have a Game Cube."

"Or a Playstation," contributed Andrew. "Then we could play Final Fantasy."

She rolled her eyes. "You are such losers. Do you even have a life?"

"Hey!" Jonathan protested. "That wasn't nice!"

"We like the way we are," said Andrew.

"Yeah!" added Jonathan.

ANDREW

_I'm never gonna say I'm sorry_

_I'm a clown for everyone_

_I'm never gonna let you down_

_I'm always here like the sun_

Dawn hit her head on the tabletop. "Oh no."

JONATHAN

_I'm a loser, that is a fact for sure_

_I'm happy even if you don't want _

_To invite me out for a dance tonight_

_I'm not normal, I know it, I don't care_

JONATHAN AND ANDREW

_We're never gonna say . . . (I'm never)_

_We're always here like the sun, we're always here (I'm always here like the sun, I'm always here)_

ANDREW

_Like a ghost I follow your steps so true_

_You don't have to bribe me to fill me up_

_Give me just a minute to shine with you_

_I will make you so happy, make you laugh_

JONATHAN

_I'm never gonna say I'm sorry for_

_The essence of my soul_

_There's so many ways to change my life_

_Cause I want to . . . oh_

_I'm like a clown, I'm fun for everyone_

JONATHAN AND ANDREW

_We're never gonna say we're sorry . . . (I'm never gonna say I'm sorry . . . )_

"Buffy, please hurry home, "Dawn begged.

Buffy checked the Bronze for Sweet. He wasn't there yet. The only thing different was that it had become chaotic. Everyone was singing along with their usual dancing. She left quickly.

She returned to the Magic Box. She'd wait for everyone to get their by some warm-ups. She went into the back and stepped up to the blue mat on the floor. She began to do a few stretches.

Giles snuck into the training room, holding a cup of tea. He took a moment to watch his slayer in action. She did a few flips and kicks. She was magnificent. His heart squeezed. A few weeks ago she had been gone. He had thought he would never see her again. It was truly a miracle to have her back. He wished there was a way to keep her away from all the evil that wanted to do away with her. It would break him to lose her again.

Buffy did the splits. Giles acknowledged how fluid and perfect her movements were. He had an absurd notion then. It was as if she had brought a piece of heaven along with her. No one could be so angelic.

GILES

_You don't need no friends  
get back your faith again  
you have the power to believe  
another dissident  
take back your evidence  
it has no power to deceive  
  
I'll believe it when I see it, for myself _

He stretched out his hand. Buffy didn't pay any attention to his song. She continued to train.

GILES

_I don't need no one to tell me about heaven  
I look at my daughter, and I believe  
I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth  
I can see the sunset and I perceive  
  
I sit with them all night  
everything they say is right  
but in the morning they were wrong  
I'll be right by your side  
come hell or water high  
down any road you choose to roam  
  
I'll believe it when I see it for myself_

Buffy performed a few practice punches.

GILES

_I don't need no one to tell me about heaven  
I look at my daughter, and I believe  
I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth  
I can see the sunset and I perceive, yeah  
  
darling, I believe, Oh Lord  
sometimes it's hard to breathe, Lord  
at the bottom of the sea, yeah yeah  
  
I'll believe it when I see it for myself_

Buffy paused for a second. Her gaze traveled up to the ceiling. Giles followed her eyes. He didn't find anything there. What had drawn her attention there? Did she perceive something the others didn't?

GILES

_I don't need no one to tell me about heaven  
I look at my daughter, and I believe  
I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth  
I can see the sunset and I perceive  
  
I don't need no one to tell me about heaven  
I look at my daughter, and I believe  
I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth  
I can see the sunset  
I can see the sunset  
I can see the sunset  
I don't need no one  
Ohhhh  
I don't need no one  
I don't need no one  
I don't need no one  
To tell me about heaven  
I believe  
I believe it, yeah _

Buffy stopped. She looked over.

"Oh, Giles, hey. I didn't see you there."

Giles smiled. He took a sip of his tea.

"Yes, well . . . "He cleared his throat. "Xander and Anya just arrived."

Spike was the next to join them. His gaze immediately fell on Buffy, his eyes softening at the sight of her. She stood up.

"Spike." It wasn't a question or even a greeting, just the symphonic expression of his name. He recognized the feeling held in it and his lips twitched upward. It was the same way he said her name.

Spike glanced around at the others. Giles seemed displeased. Anya didn't care. Xander had daggers instead of eyeballs. He decided to postpone his Buffy time for later when they could be alone.

"I uh . . . I beat up a few locals. I got the basic gist of this Sweet guy. He's lookin for a queen to take back with him. The lucky lady is whoever called him with a . . .," Spike informed.

"Uh oh," said Xander.

Spike stopped talking. He arched a brow.

"Uh oh?" piped Buffy. "Uh oh is never good. What is the uh oh? You didn't call him, did you? I asked you and you clearly responded with a 'no'."

Squirming in his chair, Xander averted his eyes. "I didn't, but I think I know who did."

"Who?" Buffy demanded.

Just then the Magic Box door opened and Tara stormed in. She looked frantic.

"Willow's missing!" the witch exclaimed.

"I can't be your bride," Willow said.

Sweet had just completed a song about how the red-head would join him in the underworld as his wife.

"You don't have a choice," Sweet said.

He took a hand and brushed it across her cheek. Her eyes got big. She was tempted to prove that she did have a choice. She racked her brain for a good spell. Maybe she could sew his lips shut. That would be a good punishment for a singing demon.

It was then that the gang burst in. Xander stepped up.

"Hey, leave her alone!"

Relief spread across Willow's face. "Xander!"

Tara eyed Willow and Sweet, a frown forming.

"I can't let you marry my friend," Buffy said.

Sweet smiled. "The slayer. Do you think you can stop me?"

Willow turned to Sweet. Her hands began to spark with energy. "She doesn't have to."

Sweet took this in.

"A witch. I sensed power within you."

"Yeah, buddy, and I suggest you let me go or you'll be sorry."

"I'd listen to her," Xander said. "She turned someone into a rat once. I don't think you can sing or dance as a rat."

"I'll do worse than that," Willow declared. "How about a mute rat?"

Willow's eyes became black as she let the power build. Tara neared. "Willow!"

It took a moment for Tara's voice to filter into Willow's ears. She looked over.

"Willow, don't."

"He deserves it," Willow said.

"But . . . Let Buffy handle this." Tara held out a hand. "Just come down here and . . ."

Willow's eyes returned to normal. The electricity vanished from her fingers.

Sweet shook his head. "I didn't realize," he said. "You are with this woman, aren't you?"

Willow crossed her arms. "Yes."

"Well now, that's a twist. That won't work. I think we'll waive the clause just this once."

Willow let out a sigh. She stepped down from the stage, going to Tara.

"Big smiles everyone! You beat the bad guy," Sweet went on to say. With that, he vanished.

Willow expected to go into welcome arms, but Tara didn't offer them. Her expression went hard.

"Why did you do it, Willow?"

"Yeah, Will," Buffy said. "I can't believe. . ." She turned to Xander, equal wrath going toward him. "And why did you encourage her to do it?"

"Well, I didn't know what was gonna happen! I just thought there were gonna be dances and songs," Xander defended. "Willow was so sad and I wanted her to have a happy ending like Anya and me."

Anya beamed.

"That doesn't make it all okay. What you did was wrong. You didn't even research the consequences of the talisman."

Xander was at a loss.

Buffy sighed. She spun around, coming face-to-face with Spike. She took his hand. Spike displayed shock at that.

"Come on, let's go back to my house. I'll fix you some hot chocolate with marshmallows," she offered.

"Buffy, what are you doing!?" Xander proclaimed.

Giles took off his glasses. "Yes, I'd like an answer to that as well."

Buffy squeezed Spike's hand. "Spike and I are together."

"What!" Xander yelled.

"He's changed, Xander."

"Because of the chip?" Xander dubiously said. "A piece of metal doesn't change a demon's nature."

"No, but love does!" Buffy spat.

"I can't believe this!"

Buffy couldn't take this. She felt herself grow hot. She had the sudden impulse to hit Xander in the nose. She let go of Spike and her hand formed a fist. But instead of smashing it into her friend she let her feelings spill out in a song.

BUFFY

_If you could only see the way he ( she) loves me  
Then maybe you would understand  
Why I feel this way about our love  
And what I must do  
If you could only see how blue his ( her) eyes can be when he ( she) says  
When he ( she) says he( she) loves me _

She glanced at Spike, who seemed pleased with her song.

BUFFY

_  
Well you got your reasons_

_And you got your opinions (lies)  
And you got your manipulations  
They cut me down to size  
Sayin' you love me but you don't understand(but you don't)  
You give your love but not the way I want (but you won't)_

_If you could only see the way he ( she) loves me  
Then maybe you would understand  
Why I feel this way about our love  
And what I must do_

_If you could only see how blue his ( her) eyes can be when he ( she) says  
When he ( she) says he( she) loves me_

_Seems the road less traveled  
Show's happiness unraveled  
And you got to take a little dirt  
To keep what you love  
That's what you gotta do  
Sayin' you love me but you don't understand( but you don't)  
You give your love but not the way I want( but you won't)   
You're stretching out your arms to something that's not your decision (just not there)  
Sayin' you love where you stand  
Give your heart when you can_

_If you could only see the way he ( she) loves me  
Then maybe you would understand  
Why I feel this way about our love  
And what I must do_

_If you could only see how blue his ( her) eyes can be when he ( she) says  
When he ( she) says he( she) loves me_

_Sayin' you love me but you don't understand ( but you don't)  
You give your love but not the way I want( but you won't)_

_Sayin' you love where you stand_

_Give your heart when you can_

_If you could only see the way he ( she) loves me  
Then maybe you would understand  
Why I feel this way about our love  
And what I must do_

_If you could only see how blue his ( her) eyes can be when he ( she) says  
When he ( she) says he( she) loves me_

The Scoobies were stunned, not sure how to respond. Buffy decided to leave them to come to terms with her decision. She dragged Spike out of The Bronze. He was just as stunned as the others, but let her pull him along. She led him to the alley outside.

"Buffy, do you know what you're doing?" Spike asked, incredulously.

He gestured to the club, indicating her friends.

"They'll deal," she said. "And if they don't . . . They'll deal." The last part was said firmly.

He seemed unconvinced. "The whelp's actions in there showed otherwise."

Frustrated, Buffy took a step forward. "Don't you get it? I don't care."

He froze.

Her lips lifted. "I don't care," she repeated, feeling light.

BUFFY

_Know all about_

_About your reputation_

_And how it's bound to be a heartbreak situation_

_But I can't help it if I'm helpless_

_Every time that I'm where you are_

_You walk in and my strength walks out the door_

_Say my name and I can't fight it anymore_

_Oh I know, I should go_

_But I need your touch just too damn much_

_Loving you isn't really something I should do_

_Shouldn't wanna spend my time with you_

_That I should try to be strong_

_But baby you're the right kind of wrong_

_Yeah baby you're the right kind of wrong_

Buffy came closer. Spike backed away.

BUFFY

_Might be a mistake_

_A mistake I'm making_

_But what you're giving I am happy to be taking_

_Cause no one's ever made me feel_

_The way I feel when I'm in your arms_

_They say you're something I should do without_

_They don't know what goes on_

_When the lights go out_

_There's no way to explain_

_All the pleasure is worth all the pain_

_Loving you isn't really something I should do_

_Shouldn't wanna spend my time with you_

_That I should try to be strong_

_But baby you're the right kind of wrong_

_Yeah baby you're the right kind of wrong_

_I should try to run_

_But I just can't seem to_

_Cause every time I run you're the on I run to_

_Can't do without, what you do to me_

_I don't care if I'm in too deep_

_Know all about_

_About your reputation_

_And how its' bound to be a heartbreak situation_

_But I can't help it if I'm helpless_

_Every time that I'm where you are_

_You walk in and my strength walks out the door_

_Say my name and I can't fight it anymore_

_Oh I know I should go_

_But I need your touch just too damn much_

_Loving you isn't really something I should do_

_Shouldn't wanna spend my time with you_

_That I should try to be strong_

Buffy backed Spike into the exterior wall of the Bronze. His head smacked against it but he seemed unfazed by the blow. His eyes were mesmerized and they never looked so blue.

She realized then how Spike felt. Before in the crypt she had surrendered to him, but he had never anticipated this: an open relationship. Never had he even thought it possible.

BUFFY

_But baby you're the right kind of wrong_

_Yeah baby you're the right kind of wrong_

Her face was a fraction of an inch away from his. She took a moment, pausing for effect, before smashing her mouth down on his. At first he didn't react. When he did, it was with a violent fervor. He grabbed her, bringing her closer.

Buffy's mind clouded and all she knew was Spike.

Sorry for the wait, guys. I've started college and have been working like mad.


	13. And the Bad is a Comin

REPLAY

**Chapter 13- And the Bad is a Comin**

Buffy lurked through the cemetery. She clutched her stake tighter. She scanned the darkness for movement. Suddenly she whirled around, stake raised.

"Ooo, evil vampire, should I kill it?"

Spike circled her. "Give us your best shot," he taunted.

She lunged at him, making a lame attempt with her stake. Spike ducked out of the way. He straightened, smirking.

"That your best try, slayer?"

Buffy lowered her stake. She pouted. "No."

"Why not?"

"I wanna hurt you but . . ." Her eyes roamed over his body.

"Can't resist my sinister attractiveness?" he filled in.

Her eyes lit up. "Exactly!"

"You know, you should be afraid of me. I'm bad."

"You are. You are very bad."

"Ooo, look at that lip." Spike grabbed her around the waist. He pulled her roughly to him. Her stake slipped from her fingers. She moaned as she felt something poke into her. "Gonna get it."

Buffy squealed as he bit her lip. She wriggled in his grasp when she felt his hand slip under her shirt.

Breaking away, Buffy said, "Spike, we're never going to get any actual slayage done if we keep playing games."

He turned his head to the left and than the right. "There aren't any big bads out tonight. Come on, pet," he pleaded.

Before she could protest he kissed her. It was hard, their tongues tangling together, hot and cold mixing. Spike's touch became feistier. They tumbled and fell to the grass. Buffy let out a muffled laugh. Something whizzed through the air where they had been. Buffy and Spike parted. They saw that it had been a stake. The wood had imbedded itself in a tree trunk nearby.

The couple turned to confront a demon. He had the head of a shark and wore a flashy suit. A couple vampire minions stood behind him.

Buffy scrambled up. She grabbed her stake. "Great," she mumbled.

"Easy, boys. No need to get physical-like," Sharky told his followers.

Spike got up to stand next to Buffy.

"Is there, Mister Spike?"

"Whadda you want? If you couldn't tell I was busy having a good time with my girl," Spike said.

Buffy rolled her eyes. She really didn't want to have to deal with this. She had conveniently put everything Spike had done without a soul out of her mind. She was going to have to have a talk with him. He couldn't go around getting himself into trouble that she had to bail him out of.

"You know me, uh ... there are a lot of things I would like, Mister Spike." Sharky pulled the stake out of the tree. "A house in Bel Air ... with a generously sized swimming pool ... and of course, the forty Siamese that you owe me."

Sharky didn't look happy. Buffy turned toward Spike. "Forty?" she repeated.

Spike ignored her. He kept his eyes on the demon. Sharky wrapped his arm around the vampire's neck.

"Take it easy, you'll get your kittens," Spike assured him.

"Oh, I trust you, Mister Spike."

"What is it with you guys? Why can't you just use money like everybody else?" complained Buffy.

"She's funny. I like funny in a girl," Sharky told Spike.

"I just need more time," Spike said.

"Time, time, time! Is what turns kittens into cats! Look, I don't wanna see anyone get hurt." He spun around and addressed his minions. "Boys."

Buffy let them go. She looked over to see Spike flee the scene. She shook his head.

Spike was a demon. Maybe Xander was right. Maybe a piece of metal couldn't change a demon's nature. But she still loved him . . . Even though sometimes she wished she didn't.

Willow and Tara sat on their bed. There was a large space between them. Willow stared down at her hands.

"When things get rough, you ... you don't even consider the options. You just ... you just do a spell. It's not good for you, Willow. And it's not what magic is for," Tara explained.

"But I ... I just wanna help people," choked Willow.

"Maybe that's how it started, but ... You can't summon some happy demon or go poof and make all the bad things go away."

Willow kept silent.

"I don't know if this is gonna work," Tara softly said.

Willow raised her head. Her green eyes sparkled with unshed tears. "Hey. It is, i-it's working. Tara, please. I need you, baby. I need you. I don't need magic, I-I don't, I ... let me prove it to you, okay? I, I will go a month without doing any magic. I won't do a single spell. I swear."

A moment passed. Then Tara nodded.

"Go a week. One week without magic."

"Fine. Fine, that's easy!"

"I don't know, I just ... think we both need some ... I don't know, space. Oh, I can't believe I'm saying this."

Willow's face fell again. "Are you saying you're going to leave me?"

The knock jarred Willow from her stupor. She had been thinking about nothing. Nothing kept the pain away.

"Wh-Who is it?" Willow asked.

"Me."

Willow sat up in bed. She brought her pillow close and hugged it to her chest. "Come in."

Buffy stepped into the darkened room. She shut the door gently behind her.

"Hey," Buffy said.

"Hey."

"I think we should talk."

Willow just stared. She couldn't believe this. She had just gotten a dose from Tara and now she was going to get a double whammy from her best friend.

"Willow?"

Willow turned her head away.

"What you did was wrong," Buffy continued. "Xander never should have given you that necklace, but you never should have used it. You're smarter than that. The Willow I used to know would have done some computer hacking before attempting it."

"Well I'm not the geeky Willow you used to know!" Willow spat.

Buffy was taken aback.

"Just go away. I can't take this from you right now," Willow commanded.

Buffy nodded. She turned and left.

Buffy sat Indian-style on a floor mat. She gazed up at Giles in shock.

"What?"

"I don't want to leave-"

"So don't!" Her voice rose louder than she intended.

Quickly she got up. She went over to sit beside him.

"What did I do wrong this time?" She was near tears.

He seemed a tad confused by her statement. "Buffy?"

"I did everything on my own. I got a job. I'm helping Dawn to keep out of trouble. I don't understand. Is it Spike?"

"What?"

"Something must have triggered you leaving me. I want to know what."

Giles's expression was too calm. He didn't understand what this meant.

"You don't need me. I've been watching you these few weeks. Not just you, all of you. You've all grown into miraculous and capable adults."

Desperate, Buffy said, "What about Dawn?"

"She has you."

"But . . . I can't do this without you."

"You can. That's why I'm going."

"You don't understand!" Buffy stood up. She ran a hand through her hair. There had to be some way to get him to stay.

Giles gave her a tender look. "I know you don't think so now, but this is for the best."

"No, it really isn't. Bad things will happen, Giles. Total badness. You have to stay!"

"I've taught you all I can about being a slayer and your mother taught you what you needed to know about life."

"It's not enough! I need help. Things are going to end up just like they did before."

Giles narrowed his eyes. "Before?"

Taking a deep breath Buffy said, "The first time when you went away."

Really I hadn't intended for Buffy to tell him. But then as I was writing it BOOM I realized that was the course I wanted to take.


	14. Uh Oh

REPLAY

Note- Okay, I know that the crystal in Tubula Rasa probably only effected everyone because they were in one place. Let's overlook that, shall we. How about it works because Willow is trying to banish all the bad events of late, and they were all involved in them.

Warning- This has spoilers for What's My Line Part 1 and 2

**Chapter 14- Uh Oh**

It took a moment for Giles to respond.

"I came back as quickly as I could. I had no idea coming back -"

"No! Not when you went away after my jump." She swallowed. "Before, when . . ."

Giles searched her eyes. "I don't understand."

The tears fell then. They slid slowly down her face and she made no attempt at brushing them away. Buffy forced herself to speak slowly in order to get things out right.

"Dawn accidentally did something. She sent us . . . We came . . . This all happened before, Giles. Some things were different, but I've been through this all before."

"Are you saying-?"

"Yes. I'm from the future."

That was the watcher's prompt to take hold of his glasses and rip them off. "Dear lord."

"Willow, come on, are you ready?" Dawn shouted up from the foot of the stairs. Tara stood beside her.

Willow appeared. It looked like she had just gotten out of the shower. She had a towel around her body and another around her hair. "Not so much. You go ahead. I'll just be a sec behind."

Annoyed, Tara said, "Fine. Come on, Dawn."

Dawn hesitated. Then she followed the blond outside. She came to a halt on the porch.

"Tara, wait. I think we should go back in. I have a bad feeling. We have to go back and check on Willow," Dawn said.

Tara processed her words. She nodded. "You're right, Dawnie. As much as I'd like to trust Will . . . You're right."

Both girls went back inside. They stepped into the living just in time to see Willow get up from her crouch by the fireplace. She quickly stuffed something into her pocket. Tara glanced from the smoldering fire to her girlfriend.

"What have you done?" Tara demanded.

There was a long silence. Finally Willow answered.

"I'm fixing things."

"How? By playing with our minds? I can't believe that you'd do this. Right after you promised. A week? You can't even go a day."

Willow's eyes flashed. "Don't you want to be happy again?"

Tara stared. Then she shook her head. "This is hopeless. I thought maybe . . . "

"Willow, you have to reverse whatever you did," Dawn pleaded.

Willow's face was hard. "You won't feel this way after it's done. No one will remember we even had a fight."

"Is this how it is going to be? Whenever someone pisses you off you'll do another spell?"

Dawn gaped. Tara had cursed.

"Maybe," Willow spat. "I have the power and I don't plan on wasting it."

Oh God, Dawn thought. She didn't recall Willow being this nasty the first time around. Could it be they had managed to intensify Willow's negative emotions?

Tara held out her hand. "Willow, give me the crystal," she commanded.

Willow's eyes widened. She seemed surprised Tara knew which spell she had performed. Her hand cupped over the bulge in her pocket. A blue glow formed around it with protection.

Electricity sparked in Tara's palms. She held them out.

"Hypocrite!" Willow yelled.

"This is my last resort," Tara said. "Just give me the crystal willingly. I don't want to hurt you."

Willow laughed. "Like you could."

Dawn took a step back. She wished she had some magical ability besides sending people through time. But she didn't. She was destined to watch her favorite couple fight, physically.

Then suddenly the world went blank.

Spike rushed into The Magic Box. He tossed his raggedy blanket to the floor, stomping on it. Smoke lifted off it. When it disappeared he straightened. He wore a proper brown suit, adorned with a bowtie. A ridiculous padded hat was on his head, also covering his ears.

"Oh, it's you."

Spike turned his head. His eyes fell on Anya. She stood at the counter, punching something into the calculator. She barely looked at him. If she noticed his unusual apparel she made no hint of it.

"I thought maybe it was somebody important. Like Xander or a customer," she went on.

"Right. Sorry to disappoint." Spike stepped further into the store. "Where's Buffy?"

Anya swatted her hand in the direction of the backroom. "She's speaking with Giles about something. I wouldn't bother them. I got the impression that it was something intense."

Just then everything spun. Spike and Anya collapsed to the ground.

Buffy woke up first. She slowly sat up with a moan.

"Huh?" she muttered, scanning her surroundings. She didn't recognize the room.

She picked herself up. She opened her senses for anything supernatural. They didn't pick up anything. She noticed the still form of her watcher.

"Giles!?"

She knelt by his side and shook him.

"Giles?"

It took awhile for Giles to become fully awake. He moaned and opened his eyes.

"Buffy?"

"Giles, something major wiggy is going on. Do you know where we are?"

Giles lifted himself up on his elbows. He glanced around. There were mats on the floor, a pommel horse, and a swinging dummy. He narrowed his eyes.

"No," he answered slowly.

She offered a hand and helped him get to his feet.

"The last thing I remember is walking back to class. What do you remember?" Buffy questioned.

He thought for a moment. "I was sorting through the watcher journals."

Rolling her eyes, she said, "You so need to get a life. Didn't I give you a suggestion to go to the movies once in awhile?"

"I prefer the classics."

"Come on, My Best Friend's Wedding is a must see."

Her watcher looked horrified at the prospect.

There was a scream. Buffy took immediate action. She ran out of the room toward the sound.

Buffy came into an open area. There were shelves of books, herbs, crystals, and archaic statues. She made herself focus on the owner of the scream. It was a woman with blond hair. She wore a pink skirt and colorful printed blouse. She searched blindly for something at her throat. It obviously wasn't there. A familiar form loomed over her. He quickly made for the neck. Then something unexpected happened. He shrieked, let the woman go, and clutched his head in pain.

"Bloody fucking hell!"

"Spike!" Buffy shouted. She fell into a combat stance.

Spike turned toward her. His features were deformed into that of a monster. He studied her with golden eyes.

"Slayer?"

Laughter spilled out of Buffy. She laughed so hard that tears formed in her eyes.

"What is so funny?" Spike demanded.

She pointed at him. He looked down and for the first time realized what he was wearing. He snatched off the tweed jacket.

"Might want to loose the hat as well," Buffy managed to get out.

Spike removed the dreadful hat.

"What is going on?" Spike muttered.

"Good question. I thought I was done with you. You'd think an organ would take your kind out of commission. At least for a little while. You're like an unlucky penny, you keep coming back." She paused. "How can a penny be unlucky? I thought all pennies were lucky."

Her words made Spike freeze. He contemplated their meaning. Dawning spread over his face. He lifted his head and gave her a menacing look.

"You dropped an organ on me," he accused.

"Don't act so surprised. That's what enemies do."

"You're going to pay for that," he snarled.

He flung himself at her. He was stopped by a cross. Giles held it out, defending his slayer.

"I suggest you leave," Giles said. "As much as I'd love to watch Buffy put an end to you we have a direr situation."

Spike growled. He hesitated for a moment before bolting the shop.

I'll try to write more later tonight.


	15. When he was Bad

REPLAY

Note- Okay, I know that the crystal in Tubula Rasa probably only effected everyone because they were in one place. Let's overlook that, shall we. How about it works because Willow is trying to banish all the bad events of late, and they were all involved in them.

Everyone has memories from What's My Line Part 1 and 2. Except Dawn.

Sorry for the long wait. RL hasn't let up for me. But hey, it is extra long for ya, so no complaining.

**Chapter 15- When he was Bad**

Willow woke up to a very strange environment. She was sprawled out on the carpet of her best friend's living room. She didn't remember getting there. In fact, the last thing she recalled was walking down the hall with Oz at school. She lifted herself and made an 'eep'. There were two strangers in the room with her.

Was Buffy having a slumber party? Maybe she had somehow consumed spiked punch and passed out. That might explain why her mind couldn't connect point A to point B.

Just then the blond woman opened her eyes. This was followed by the teenager.

"Who are you people?" the teenager asked.

"Hey," Willow said. "I'm Willow."

The young girl seemed really scared. She hugged herself. "I don't remember anything."

Willow's eyes widened. "Nothing?"

The girl shook her head.

Willow turned toward the blond. "How about you?"

The woman appeared to be surprised she had been spoken to. She shyly met Willow's eyes. "I-I don't remember how I got here either. I remember who I am, though. I'm T-Tara."

Willow smiled. "Hi, I'm Willow. The last thing I remember is talking to someone at school." She glanced around. "This is my friend Buffy's house. Maybe we should see if anyone else is here. Buffy might be able to explain what is going on."

"Good idea," the teenager commented.

They got up. Splitting up they checked the house. Apparently they were the only ones there.

"What now?" the teenager asked.

Willow bit her lip. Before she could respond the doorbell rang. All three of them shared a questioning look.

"I think we should answer it," the teenager said.

Willow went to the door. She braced herself before opening it. A man burst in, almost knocking her down.

"Will!" Xander shouted. "It is so good to see you. Something is up. I went home and my parents insist I no longer live there. As grand as that sounds . . . Sweet mother, what are you wearing?"

Xander pointed to Willow's chest and fish-mouthed. She followed his finger. She gasped and hid her exposed cleavage. Her mother would never have approved of this shirt.

"Are you wearing make-up?" Xander went on. "And your hair . . ."

Willow touched her head. Her hair was shorter than it was supposed to be.

"This isn't right," Willow said.

He shook his head. "The Willow I know would never have worn a sexy top like that. And did that really come out of my mouth?"

Willow blinked.

Xander noticed Tara and the girl for the first time. He gestured in their direction.

"Who are they?"

"Oh, I woke up next to them. That's Tara and . . . The girl doesn't remember anything, even her name." She gave the teenager an apologetic look.

"Buffy's not here?"

"No. But we really need to find her," Willow said.

The first place Spike went was the warehouse. It was abandoned. The only indication that a couple of vampires had inhabited it was the lingering stench of death.

He went to Willy's next. He needed information. Where was Drusilla?

He hardly got a foot in the bar when he was tossed out. He was kicked and hit until he fell to the ground.

"We've discussed this before, Spike. This bar doesn't serve your kind," the vampire said.

"My kind?" Spike asked in disbelief.

The vampire snorted. "Turn coats. Go back to where you belong. At the slayer's feet."

With that the vampire left Spike in the alley.

"Spike, buddy, is that you?"

Spike turned his head. A demon stood there. He had floppy ears that reminded him of a dog. His skin sagged tremendously. The demon came over and helped Spike to his feet.

"It isn't smart to come around here now. Mr. Shark is searching for you."

Spike squinted. "Do I know you?"

The demon was taken aback. "Come on, it's your pal Clem. Do you have amnesia?"

"What is the date?" Spike asked.

"What? November. 2001." Clem grabbed Spike's arm. "I think we should get you back to your crypt and sort you out."

Buffy knelt before the young woman. "He's gone."

The woman glanced up. She was pale in the dim light and she looked terribly scared. She began to mutter something over and over. Buffy strained to hear.

"It's gone. It's gone. It's gone."

Buffy furrowed her brow. "What is gone?"

The woman's eyes lifted. She seemed to realize how vulnerable she seemed. She sat up straight, her expression hardening. Buffy rose, offering her hand.

"I'm Buffy. What is your name?"

The woman ignored the slayer's hand. She picked herself up. Her eyes darkened.

"I am Anyanka," she said, threateningly.

Starring at her blankly, Buffy asked, "And is that supposed to mean something?"

"You've never heard of me?"

Buffy shook her head.

"I am legendary. I, Anyanka, member of D'Hoffryn, have littered the world with masculine entrails. When I get my necklace back I will make sure you remember my name."

Buffy scrunched up her nose.

Giles stepped up. "Good lord, are you telling us that you are a vengeance demon employed by D'Hoffryn?"

Anya gave a small smile. "Yes. I right scorned women. Now, if you will excuse me, I must be on my way." She attempted to walk away. Buffy quickly grabbed her arm in a deathly grip.

"Hey!" Anya hissed.

"If you think we're going to let you leave . . . !"

"Buffy, we have more important matters to attend to," Giles said.

Buffy yanked Anya toward the door. "Come on, entrail girl, you're coming with us." She turned to Giles. "Let's take her back to my house. Mom's out of town. We'll tie her up and discuss what to do next."

Anya pouted on their way out.

Willow couldn't stop looking at the blond girl. It was extremely disturbing. It wasn't an enviously 'I wish I had her body' way. It was an 'I want to touch her body' way. She forcefully averted her gaze and moved closer to Xander. She made herself take him in. He's hot, he's hot, he's hot, she thought in a mantra. I don't like girls.

What is wrong with me? Willow thought. She fumbled with her hands nervously.

"Do you think we should go out and l-look for your friend?" Tara asked.

Turning toward Tara, Willow opened her mouth to speak. Oh, look at those plump . . . OH GOD! She clamped her mouth shut and quickly swung her head away.

"Shouldn't we go to the hospital?" Dawn asked. No one seemed to hear.

"We could check the library," Xander suggested.

"She likes to read?" Dawn questioned.

Xander laughed. "Buff? Oh yeah, she's a total bookworm," he said with sarcasm.

Just then the door burst open. Willow and Xander jumped up from the couch. Buffy emerged. She pushed a very displeased woman into the room.

"Oh, hey guys!" Buffy cried, surprised.

"Buffy, we are so glad to see you!" Willow yelped.

Xander pointed to Buffy. "You're hair has grown!"

Buffy glanced from one best friend to the other. She frowned. "You look different too. Older."

Giles came up behind Buffy.

"Everyone's hair is different. Did yours get grayer?" Xander asked.

Giles narrowed his eyes. "Thank you, Xander. I refuse to acknowledge that question."

Buffy took charge as always. "Look, guys, we all have changed. I think there is a possibility that we traveled into the future. Either that or someone did a magical aging spell."

"That makes sense," Willow agreed. "Neither scenario sounds good to me."

Raising his hand, Xander said, "I have to go with the time travel theory. My parents told me that I no longer live with them. They didn't find anything unusual with my newly manly self." He paused. "Of course my dad wasn't in the clearest mindset as usual. My mom, though, would have reacted somehow. . . I think."

Buffy made some hand gestures in the air. "All right, so time went wonky. How do we fix it?"

"First we have to figure out what caused all this," Willow stated.

"Good deduction, Holmes," Xander said.

"I suggest we seek out the library," Giles recommended.

Buffy tugged Anya's arm. The vengeance demon frowned.

"I'm not a cow you can herd around," she protested.

Buffy gripped Anya's arm tighter, which made the woman hiss.

"Who's your friend?" Willow asked.

"Anyanka," Anya said, clearly expecting a fearful reaction. She sighed when she got none.

"Oh. Well, nice to meet you," Willow said. The red-head gestured toward Tara and then Dawn. "This is Tara and- We don't know her name. She has complete amnesia."

Buffy furrowed her brow. Giles studied the young girl.

"Very odd," he remarked. He addressed the girl. "There are books at the school that can help us get to the bottom of this."

Dawn's lips lifted slightly. "Thank you."

The group filed out of 1630 Revello Drive. They walked down the road in silence, each lost in their worries. It seemed as if the world slept for once. There was no one about, demon or human. The only sound was the rustle of the trees.

They came to an abrupt halt when they met their destination.

Dawn shook her head. "Why did we stop?"

"Merciful Zeus!" Xander exclaimed.

Giles thrust off his glasses. "Good Lord!"

"Um. . . Where'd the school go?" Buffy asked.

Sure enough, the school was nowhere to be found. In its place stood the beginning of a construction site. Partial walls hinted that a new building was going to take the old Sunnydale High's place.

"You didn't happen to burn it down like Hemery, did you?" Willow asked, with a raised eyebrow.

The prospect was atrocious. There was no way he had a chip in his brain. He almost laughed at the idea. The government wasn't smart enough to do something like that. And besides, he would never let them do it even if they were capable. To prove this, Spike clamped his hand around the demon's neck. Hard.

"Does that hurt?" he growled.

The demon's eyes bulged. He nodded.

"Then you lie, mate. I can cause pain. This little show proves it."

"Umins," choked Clem.

"What was that, mate?"

Spike leaned forward. He loosened his hold.

Clem gasped. "Humans only," he got out.

Spike's jaw twitched. The thought of no warm blood, to never experience the coppery substance sliding down his throat . . . His hands formed into fists.

"Look, Spike, buddy . . . " Clem paused. "I don't understand. I thought you didn't mind the chip so much anymore. I mean, you've been helping out the slayer and everything."

"Slayer?"

The way Spike said it made Clem jump.

"Something is clearly wrong with you. I think-"

Spike had had enough. He jarred out and hit the friendly demon in the face. Clem fell unconscious, hitting the stone floor. Spike stepped over him, heading out into the night.

The gang went to the only place that made sense. The Magic Box. Giles had taken note of a myriad of volumes there that might be helpful.

"Is it still open?" Dawn asked.

Buffy shrugged.

"A magic store? Sounds cool," Willow remarked.

Anya pouted the entire way there.

They made it with no problem. The doors were still unlocked and so they went right in. Buffy let Anya go, but kept her eye on the ex-vengeance demon. Anya wandered around, taking in the merchandize.

"Whoever owns this shop has very good taste." She ran a finger over a shelf. Then she examined it. "And keeps it very tidy."

The others paid little attention to her ramblings. They were busy going through books. Except for Buffy. She tried, but couldn't concentrate. Finally she gave up. She shut the dusty hardback in front of her and stood up.

"I'm no use to you guys. I'm fighty girl, not researchy girl. I think I'll go find something to beat up. Hopefully the one who did this to us," she said.

Giles considered her proposal. "Yes, that is a good idea. You might be able to get some information around town."

Buffy nodded. She smiled, and then turned to go.

"Hey, the forms next to the cash register say that Anya and Rupert own the shop together. No wander it is in such good shape," Anya announced as Buffy exited. She almost turned back, but decided not to. That information wasn't any weirder than anything else that night. In fact it was comforting. That meant they weren't trespassing by barging into a shop and going through books for sale.

She didn't make it far. Spike met her only two blocks away.

"Slayer," he greeted.

A heavy sigh escaped her lips. "Spike, I really don't have time for this."

He slipped into game face. "You don't have much time left. I hear you're responsible for a piece of metal in my brain. Time to test it out."

She reached into her pocket and pulled out a stake. "Whatever. Fine. Let's make it fast."

He ran at her. He got in a good punch. He waited as if in anticipation for a moment. Nothing happened. His hesitation gave Buffy the opportunity to get him down on the pavement.

"Floppy Ears was lying afterall. I'm as free as ever. Free enough to kill you," he leered.

She rolled her eyes. "Free enough to try."

Spike sprung to his feet. He circled her on the balls of his feet. "Ready to dance, pet?"

She answered him with a kick to his ribs. They would have continued this if it wasn't for the ambush. A crowd of vampires surrounded them.

"Friends of yours?" Buffy questioned.

"You know I only go for one on one."

Buffy ducked a kick. She spun, thrusting out her stake. A cloud of dust formed in the air. She went for the next foe.

"Spike, the boss isn't convinced you're going to pay up," a vampire said.

"Pay?" Spike asked. He would have left the slayer to do battle alone. Probably would have watched even, rooting on the fang gang. But an odd thing happened. It seemed like he was the target. Against his will he had to join the slayer in battling the vamps.

Willow was the first to hear the commotion outside.

"Hey, do you hear that?" she asked.

"Hear what?" Xander questioned.

"Shhhh. Listen."

There was a span where no one spoke. The faint sound of a brawl filtered into the shop.

"I hear it. Sounds like fighting," Tara remarked.

Willow stood up. "It sounds like a big fight. Buffy probably is in it. We have to go help."

They all agreed to go. They gathered artillery. Xander handed a stake over to Dawn. She eyed it warily.

"What are we fighting?" Dawn asked.

Xander thought better of it and gave her a cross instead. "Just point it at the grrr monsters."

They headed out.

It didn't take long for them to find the battle. Buffy, and surprisingly Spike, were in the midst of it. The others joined in. With the extra white hats, the vampires waned.

Willow struggled with her opponent. He was significantly larger than her, so she wasn't shocked when she was thrown to the ground. She didn't notice the crystal that slid out of her pocket on impact. She quickly picked herself up to continue fighting. Eventually she was able to get the piece of wood into the vampire's heart. He disintegrated immediately. She smiled at her accomplishment. She turned to find another match, and her foot stepped onto the fallen crystal. It crushed, releasing a greenish glow.

The last vamp disappeared. Everyone seemed a little dizzy for a moment. Then their eyes widened in realization. Suddenly Xander let out a laugh.

"Sorry, I just got back the memory of seeing _King Ralph_."

Willow met Tara's eyes. She saw disgust. With a shake of her head, Tara walked away.

"Tara!" Willow called. She ran after her. "Tara, wait!"

Dawn surveyed her friends and sister. "You all remember me, right? You got back fake memories along with the others, right?"

Xander gave her a smile. "Yeah, Dawnie. We remember."

"Phew, good."

Spike hadn't moved. Buffy moved toward him, worry on her face.

"Spike?" Buffy asked.

His head shot up. Panic spread over his features. He took a staggering step back.

"What is it?" Buffy inquired.

He didn't answer. Instead he fled the scene. Buffy watched him go in shock. She was hit by the irony of the situation. It was never Spike who ran away. Not anymore. Not since they had been enemies. Why was he doing it now? She felt pain ignite in her chest.

Willow tried to apologize. Her attempts were futile. Either Tara had become deaf or had decided to ignore her. She stared in frozen horror as her other half packed a suitcase.

Anya snuggled up to Xander in bed.

"I like life as a human far more than that as a demon," she said.

He pulled her close. "Good."

Giles flipped the ticket from side-to-side. Then he placed it back on the table. He sighed and reached for his glass of scotch.

When a slayer's mind was made up, it was made up. And Buffy's was set on finding Spike. She raced through Sunnydale, finding her way to the cemetery. She slowed when the dark crypt came into view. At first she had the impulse to smash her foot into the door and force her way in. Instead she knocked. There was no answer.

She reached out and opened the door with a creak. She stepped into the shadowed realm.

"Spike?"

She had expected to encounter a drunken vampire, but there was not a bottle in sight. Spike sat against his sarcophagus with his head bowed. He didn't move until she was upon him.

"Go away." His voice was hoarse, and Buffy could have sworn he had been crying.

She crouched to his level. "Spike, what is this?"

"Why'd you come here slayer?"

Slayer?

"To set things right."

"They can't be right, can't you see that? I. . ." He lifted his head. His eyes met hers, full of pain. "I tried to hurt you. I'm a monster. That's all I'll ever be. I try, but it is inside me. You were right. I'm just a serial killer under lock and key. Given the chance-"

His words were silenced when her hand cupped his cheek. Her face softened. She leaned down and pressed her lips to his.

"I don't see a monster. I see a man. This little extravaganza only enforces that. I know now how different you are. How much you've changed. For me."

His mouth fell agape, but let out no sound. He gazed at her in awe.

That part took me forever to write. Yay, it is finally done. Now I can start on the next one.


	16. What are friends for?

REPLAY

**Chapter 16- What are Friends For?**

Living on the hellmouth and being a watcher had made Giles believe that nothing could surprise him. He had seen quite a bit, and he had been beginning to think that there wasn't much he hadn't set his eyes on. He was wrong. Time travel. That boggled his mind out of proportion. That was something left to the science fiction genre. Through all his years of studying he had never heard of a true encounter taking place.

And now he had. By his own slayer no less. She sat before him, looking nervous.

"I don't know why you didn't come to me sooner about this," he said.

She shyly lifted her gaze. "I thought it was best not to," she replied. "I didn't want you to have to find out what happened before. We went through horrible things, Giles. Well, you were absent for most of it."

He felt a pang in his chest. "I am truly sorry. I thought it would be for the best to go. I had no intention of causing you further pain."

Buffy gave him a small smile. "I know. Just please don't leave this time."

"I tore it up."

"Huh?"

"The plane ticket."

It took a moment for his words to penetrate. When they did her face brightened. For a moment he thought she might get up and hug him. She didn't, but kept looking at him with that expression of joy. The sight made him smile as well, and his eyes crinkle.

"I'm staying Buffy," he assured her.

"Good," she said. "We can't have you reverting back to tweed suits and prudish ways."

"Prude? Excuse me? The British are very open to uh . . . certain urges."

She giggled. The sound was so girlish and full-heartened. He couldn't remember the last time he had seen her so blissful. Ever since her mother had passed away it had been downhill. Why had he ever decided to abandon her in the first place? If his residence could bring such merriment there was no threat of him ever departing.

"I'll be here for you all this time. Tell me what needs to be done," Giles said.

She became more serious, but there was still light in her gaze. "Things will be better this time." She said it with such confidence that he believed her words entirely.

"Where should we start?"

Buffy's answer was immediate. "Willow. The sooner she gets help the better."

The news didn't surprise him. It did make him a tad bit sad, though. Willow had always been such a bright and sweet girl. He almost wished she had never discovered magic. He knew it had gotten them out of binds, but they could have found other ways.

"What does she do?" He didn't want to know, not really.

Buffy's green eyes shifted downward. "It isn't pretty. Someone will die. A human someone."

"Good Lord!"

Her head shot up and she raised her hand. "Relax. It is someone we all want to do away with. Willow had good reason to do it. But there never is a good enough reason to kill a man in my book."

Images swam through Giles's mind. He saw Ben sprawled out on the cold concrete floor, bloody and helpless. He saw himself reach out and smother the life out of him. 'There never is a good enough reason to kill a man'. Oh Buffy, you just don't understand. If he were given the chance he would do the same thing over. It was something that had to be done. But that didn't make him feel any better about the fact. He did not wish the guilt on someone else, especially Willow.

"The next priority is Warren."

"Warren?"

"Andrew and Jonathan's fearless leader."

"Ah, I see."

"A minor threat, but still a threat. We have to find out where his lair is located."

"Anything else?"

"Do you want me to make a list?"

She watched him get up. He went over to the cash register and fumbled around in the drawer beneath it. He found a pad of paper and pen. Then he came back over. He wrote Willow and then Warren down.

"Okay," she said. "Xander."

Giles gave her a curious look.

"I think I fixed things with him, but we can't jump the gun. He left Anya at the alter. Then she goes all vengeful again."

Poor girl. He added Xander/Anya to the list.

"Spike and I are taken care of."

That got his attention. "What happened with you and him before?"

She shifted in her seat. "You don't want to know."

Actually he did. But it wasn't any of his business, so he let it go.

"I need to find a warlock named Rack. That should be easy. I'll just get Spike to lead me to him like I did the first time. Should be a cinch." She paused. "Then there's Amy. Oh, what time is it!?"

He glanced at his watch. "A little after nine."

Buffy jumped to her feet. "I have to get home! I totally forgot! How stupid can I get?"

Buffy left the door open for Giles, who was supposedly behind her. She raced upstairs. She knew she was too late. Her slayer intuition was in overdrive.

She entered the master bedroom to find Willow on the bed, sitting calmly. She came to a halt.

"Buffy. Hey," Willow greeted.

Buffy scanned the room. There was no sign of Amy.

"H-How are you doing?"

"Uh, okay," Willow replied.

Just then the closet opened. Amy stepped out, dazed.

"The whole school?" Amy questioned.

Willow nodded.

"By a giant snake thing? Okay, still adjusting. Hi, Buffy."

Buffy blinked. "H-Hi. How have you been?"

"Rat. You?"

From the future. "Dead."

"Oh."

Giles burst into the room. He took in the situation.

"Amy. Hello," Giles said.

Amy stared, wide eyed. "Mr. Giles? Wow, a whole welcome party."

"Would you like a ride home?" Giles offered.

Before Amy could speak Willow did. "She just got de-ratted. I doubt she's ready to face her dad."

"Wouldn't she feel more comfortable in her own home?"

Willow turned to Buffy. "Don't you think she should stay the night? It's late."

"I-I don't know. Maybe Giles is right. I think maybe Amy should go home," Buffy said.

Willow was clearly not pleased. "Fine. Take her home." Her voice came out harsh.

"Will, don't be mad."

Willow addressed Amy. "Sorry."

Amy shook her head. "Oh, no problem. I bet my dad is wandering where I am."

Understatement much?

Giles led Amy out.

Willow glared at Buffy. "You could have acted more hospitable."

"I just thought she would feel more comfortable at her own home."

Willow wouldn't meet Buffy's eyes.

It took awhile for the revelation to hit Spike. Afterward he didn't know what to do. He sat, sloshing a bottle of bourbon, but not actually drinking.

The chip didn't work anymore. It couldn't. During Willow's spell he had delivered many blows in response to Buffy's own. Unless his head was somehow effected by the spell as well as his memories. There was only one way to find out.

He cornered the young woman in an alley. She was a tasty thing, wearing a red jacket and tight jeans, her white neck tauntingly exposed. She squeaked as he trapped her against the brick wall. Her whole body trembled.

"I'm not going to kill you," he drawled. "I just need a taste. Just to see if what I fear is right."

He changed, letting his demon out to play. The woman screamed. He lunged for her vein. He could feel the pull of the pumping stream. Remember, this is a test, he reminded himself. Your goal isn't to drain her. Remember Buffy.

An explosion ignited inside his brain. He hollered and doubled over, clutching his head.

"Fuck! What is going on!?"

He was vaguely aware of the woman as she fled the scene.

"Good god, that's a lot of shake," remarked Tara. "I know part of our big movie and milkshake fun day, but . . . good god, that's a lot of shake."

Dawn laughed. She released her hold on the straw. "Helps to wash down the Raisinettes."

"Promise me that you will eat something green tonight. Leafy green, not . . . gummi green."

They both laughed. Dawn leaned down and slurped up some more chocolate goodness.

"The movie was fun."

"Yeah. It was cool how all those inner-city kids taught their coach a valuable lesson." She paused. "We should do this sort of thing again."

Tara nodded. "Definitely. . . You know I will always be there for you, right? There, there was actually more of a lead-in when I practiced that at home."

Dawn's glee disappeared. "I know."

"It's just . . . I want you to know that my moving out had nothing to do with you, and I, I will never stop loving you."

"I know," Dawn whispered.

They were uncomfortable, both silent for a moment.

"Tara?"

"What, honey?"

"You can't abandon Willow completely. She needs all the support she can to get better. Otherwise . . . She might get worse. Please come by and see her once in awhile."

"I-I'll think about it. Maybe after we've had some time apart," Tara said.

The girls neared the house. Their heads were full of deep thoughts.

"Please come in," Dawn begged. "The nerds aren't around. They went home to their parents for awhile. I think anymore time with them would have made Buffy crack."

Tara sighed. "I don't know if I'm ready to see her yet, Dawnie."

Just then a figure emerged from the shadows. Both of them jumped. Dawn was the first to relax when she realized who it was.

"Spike?"

Something was clearly not right. He usually smiled when he met up with her. Not this time, though.

"I need some help," Spike said.

"What can we do?" Tara asked.

"Some good wicca magic might be the key. I think something might be wrong with my chip."

Their eyes widened.

Thanks for sticking with me, despite my really long break between updates.


	17. Wrong

REPLAY

**Chapter 17- Wrong**

Tara had never thought of Spike as a monster. She had never seen him without the chip, which may make her opinion bias, but she couldn't imagine him as a ruthless killer. Coming to her for help made the view that he was more than a demon under house arrest even stronger.

"I suppose I could look inside your head?" she said.

Spike looked a little weary. "Inside? Better not go poking about. Had enough of that." He lifted his hands and wiggled his fingers near his temples. "Can't you just use your enhanced witchy senses to see if somethin's off?"

She did have enhanced senses when it came to auras. But that wouldn't help him out. His color had always been red and still was, although ever since he had gotten with Buffy there were glimmers in it. The chip had nothing to do with his personality.

"I-I won't literally stick my fingers inside your brain," Tara softly assured him.

"Oh, right, good. Get to it then," he said.

"Are we going inside to do this?" asked Dawn.

Tara glanced at the house. It was dark except for a light on upstairs. She recognized it as the master bedroom. Willow's room.

"That's not a good idea, Dawnie. Sorry. We can't expose Willow to magic right now," Tara objected.

Dawn frowned, clearly disappointed.

"The Magic Box?"

Tara glanced at her watch. "It's late. The shop is closed."

"Spike could break us in."

Spike smirked.

"No," Tara said.

Spike shook his head. "Can't you at least let me be a 'little' bit evil?" He sighed. "Fine. We'll meet up at my crypt. You'll get the stuff round, yeah?"

"Sure."

"Right then." He dug into his duster pocket for a cigarette. Lighting up he turned. "See you both then."

On their way to Tara's dorm, they were silent for a long while. Dawn was the one to break it.

"I don't think Spike's chip is bad," she said.

"It's a piece of hardware. Things don't last forever."

"I know, but it di- Um, the Initiative seemed pretty confident it would last."

"I think Spike was a beta-tester." Tara glanced over and smiled. "Don't worry, sweetie. Spike puts too much credit on the chip. I'm sure even if it is bad he won't hurt us."

Dawn nodded. "Buffy wouldn't like it."

"He loves you too, you know? Why else would he ba. . . watch you all summer? " She had almost said baby-sit, which she knew would annoy Dawn.

"Because he promised my sister," Dawn muttered. "But you're right. I think he does love me. But I'm not like Buffy."

Tara grabbed Dawn's hand and squeezed it. She got the impression that Dawn felt a little jealous.

They arrived at Tara's dorm and gathered the ingredients needed for the spell. Luckily it was simple and didn't require much. Neither had any trouble carrying the small amount of candles, incense, herbs, etc. on the trek over. Tara had never been to Spike's crypt, but Dawn knew the way by heart.

Tara expected to find a dirty, cold, dark, and empty place. It was cold and dark. There weren't any cobwebs in sight, though. And . . . furniture? She blinked in surprise.

She set up quickly. Spike sat in the circle, dubiously. Dawn hovered nearby. The spell was supposed to detect what was wrong with something so it could be fixed. She found nothing. She was pretty confident that meant the chip was in ship-shape. It could also mean that the spell didn't work. But seeing as the spell was 'extremely' novice . . .

"What's the verdict, sprite?" Spike leaned back on his hands to examine her.

"There's nothing wrong," she said.

"How sure are you bout that?"

"Uh . . . Nine-Ninety-nine percent?"

There was a moment of silence. Then he nodded. She let out a breath.

"All right. Fair enough." He took a moment to ponder the results.

Dawn moved closer. "This is good, right?" she asked.

"Okay, maybe the chip was affected while under the spell," he rationalized.

"No," Tara said. "The spell didn't have a physical effect, only mental."

Spike's head shot up. He got to his feet. He stepped over the candles and began to pace, running his hand through his gelled hair. He mumbled to himself.

Dawn gave Tara a questioning look. Tara honestly didn't have an answer. Was Spike disappointed that the chip still worked fine?

"Bloody hell," Spike said, his voice raising. He halted and turned toward the girls. "You know what this means, right?"

Tara shook her head. Dawn said 'no'.

"If nothing's wrong up here. . . "He tapped his temple. "Then . . . Then there must be something wrong with her."

"Her?" Tara questioned.

"Buffy."

"What?"

"I hit her. During Red's spell. I hit her and there were no blasts. That means Red musta done something wrong when she brought the slayer back. There's always consequences. Always." He said the last part mostly to himself.

"I-I don't think. . ."

Dawn looked stricken by the implication. She shook her head. "No, I refuse to believe that!"

Spike directed his gaze on the teen. "Think about it, bite size. I can't hurt humans. If I hurt Buffy . . ."

"No!" cried Dawn. "Maybe Buffy is different, but she isn't . . . wrong."

Tara inwardly shuddered. What had Willow done? She felt her heart sink. Spike was right. There were always consequences, may them be good or bad. Some people called it karma, or the three fold law. There was no way she could accept all of what Willow had done. Her girl- ex girlfriend had fallen too far into the darkness. She feared that Willow had fallen too deep to ever climb back out into the light.

"I'll look into the spell Willow cast," Tara offered.

This seemed to calm Spike down. He gave the witch an appreciative smile. "Thanks, Glenda."

Buffy hadn't seen Spike in four days. She had been busy with work, talking things through with Giles, and dealing with Willow. She was surprised that he hadn't dropped by. That wasn't like him. Even when they weren't together he had purposely run into her.

On the fifth morning she couldn't stand it anymore. She set her coffee down on the counter and faced her sister. She realized then, with a pang of guilt, that she had barely seen her sister in four days either. Dawn glanced up from her Coco-Puffs.

"Have you seen Spike recently?" Buffy tried to make it sound nonchalant.

Dawn munched away. With her mouth full she said," Yeah, the other day."

"Is something wrong? Is he avoiding me for some reason?"

Dawn dropped her spoon. "He's probably still dwelling over the fact that he can hurt you."

The slayer's eyes widened. "Hurt me? When did he hurt me?" Then she remembered. "Oh."

"Yeah." Dawn paused. "Tara's looking into it."

"Good. Then he'll find out all that's wrong is a really bad suntan."

"Huh?"

"I never told you about that? Tara said my molecules got heated or something. I never really got it; but the point is that I'm okay."

"I know you're okay. But Spike is not quite so sure."

All of a sudden there was a honk. Buffy knew it was Xander. Dawn quickly slurped down her bowl of milk. She grabbed her coat. Buffy was disappointed that their conversation had to be cut short. Dawn gave her a parting hug.

"Go see him," Dawn said.

"Did you pack a lunch?" Buffy asked.

"I'll get something from the vending machine."

Buffy was ready to protest but her sister hurried out of the room. "Gotta go, can't be late! Bye!"

She sighed. "Bye."

Following Dawn's advice, Buffy went to see Spike. She found him in his favorite chair (his only chair), sipping on a mug of blood and watching TV. His eyes might have been glued on the soap, but she got the impression that his attention was somewhere else.

"What brings you by, luv?"

She could have laughed.

"What brings me by? Oh, I don't know Spike, maybe I was bored and decided to waste some time."

He didn't reply.

"That was sarcasm," she said. "My time with you isn't a waste. I thought you would be aware of how relationships work, you being one hundred and fifty-"

"One hundred and forty-six."

"What?"

"'M one hundred and forty-six."

"Whatever. Point is you're old. You should know stuff. You should know that girlfriends visit their boyfriends."

He was silent. Seconds ticked by and with each one she grew more frustrated.

Finally he spoke. "Is that what we are, pet? Girlfriend and boyfriend?"

She rolled her eyes. "Well, duh."

Her frustration had grown into anger. He had yet to face her. She stomped over and switched off the television. "Will you look at me?"

His blank gaze landed on her.

"Why are you being like this?" she demanded. She knew she hadn't done a damn thing. "Wait, I know what this is! You always get like this when you have to deal with something. You hide your feelings by acting all dumbass. Well, I'm not going to take it." She crossed her arms. "Tell me straight up why you've been avoiding me."

"Haven't been avoiding. Just been busy is all."

Gesturing to the TV screen, she said, "Watching shows?"

"Is it any of your business?"

Fire touched her eyes. "God, Spike, sometimes-!" She let out an 'eeeer' sound. She wanted to punch him. She wanted to make his nose bleed. But she knew that wouldn't solve anything. She struggled to calm down.

"You think you know me, slayer? You think you've got me all figured out, don't you?"

Her face hard, she said, "Better than you think."

He stood up. His movements were fluid, catlike. "Think again. You have 'no' idea what I'm feelin right now."

"So tell me! Explain to me what the problem is!"

He took a step toward her. "The problem is that I could knock you to the floor right now. I could rip the clothes from your body and screw your brains out. I could make it hurt real good, baby."

That was the turning point. In that moment Buffy made a mistake. She knew his reference collided with his future attempted rape act. She knew it. But that didn't change the fact that she was turned on. The heat had seeped through her, igniting every nerve. Most of the attention was focused between her legs. Oh how she wanted him.

She could have prevented it. She should have cleared her mind and shook off her desire. Instead she fell, as if in a trap.

"Why don't you?" she seductively asked. It was a challenge, an 'I dare you to'.

Never dare a vampire. More importantly never dare a vampire without a soul. And even more essential, never dare a soulless vampire with issues.

At first Spike was stunned. Then something came over him. He smirked. "Would you like that, baby?"

And Buffy smiled. "Maybe."

Later Buffy would remember this with disgust. Honestly this wasn't her. Something else was controlling her. Some primal part of her that was usually hidden down deep. Possibly the same part of her that had been attracted to Dracula, and lured her from bed at night to the graveyard. The slayer part. And she got off on pain.

What Spike did next wasn't him either. It was his primitiveness acting as well. She couldn't really blame him. She had taunted him, driven it to the surface.

Spike pounced.

She hit the stone floor, her head banging against it. Spike grabbed hold of her clothing and tore it off. She reiterated the act, her hands frantically impatient. His cold, naked body smashed against hers. He pounded into her with no restraint. She cried out as he rode her to oblivion.

This would have been exactly how the bathroom scene played out if he had succeeded, if she had let him get away with it.

He had not failed in his promise. It hurt real good.

And she enjoyed it.

Okay, you are probably gaping at the computer screen and shaking your head. What the heck have you done? you are wondering. You ruined Spuffy! Well, uh . . . Originally I planned on having this sweet love scene where they had their first time (all over again), but then this came into form. It may be brutal and very dark, but it is very powerful. And if you feel uncomfortable about it- Good. That was what I wanted. It is 'supposed' to make you not like it.

Don't worry, I'll make it all better. But I did do this for a reason. It made a few things known: Spike may love Buffy and want to be treated like a man but he is a vampire and can let that control him, Buffy has a violent slayer side that is fighting to come to the surface, and 'the biggest thing I wanted to get across' SPUFFY CAN'T BE FLUFFY ALL THE TIME. Spike and Buffy are warriors, and to be able to be so they have to have a dark side, and it has to come out sometimes. Well, it came out.

And this turned into a long rant, didn't it? I'm shutting up now.


	18. Right

REPLAY

Sorry there have been no breaks between scenes. 't kind. It doesn't likemy format. I'm going to have to use line breaks, I guess.

**Chapter 18- Right**

The first thing she was aware of was the cold, hard floor. Her eyes popped open and she checked to see if the roof had caved in. Luckily it hadn't. She abruptly sat up. Déjà vu rushed through her. She half expected to find rubble scattered across the place. The only indication of their rough play was their dispersed clothing, however. She snatched her panties up, finding them ripped.

"Oh my God," she slowly said.

"Did I do that?" asked a deep, masculine voice.

Buffy's head snapped over to find Spike. He was propped up on his elbows, examining her with an innocent look on his face. Buffy lowered the ruined garment. That wasn't the only thing ruined because of their violent nature. How could she have made the same mistake over again? How would she ever be able to fix this?

Buffy spotted her skirt. She picked it up and quickly stepped into it. Then she threw on her blouse. As an afterthought, she stuffed the panties into her pocket. She scanned the room.

"Where are my shoes?"

"What's the hurry, luv?"

She wrapped her arms around herself. "I can't stay here."

His eyes darkened. "So that's it? You're going to leave all disgusted because of my evil antics? Newsflash, princess, I'm a 'vampire'. You knew that when you got into this gig."

She couldn't argue there. She knew there was darkness inside him. What she hadn't anticipated was the darkness that he could bring out in her.

_You belong in the shadows... with me. _

She briefly closed her eyes and shuddered. She didn't belong in the shadows, but he could pull her down into them. She'd let him . . . and she'd like it. Maybe this wouldn't work. She loved him and he loved her, but sometimes there were other factors that interfere. What if she couldn't be with him without falling into the deep abyss? And what other option was there? It wasn't like she could bring him out into the light.

"You're right," she said. "But if we keep this going it's going to kill us both. Believe me I know."

Spike swiftly got to his feet. He stood before her in all his naked glory. She managed to keep her gaze focused on his face.

"What are you saying, luv? That it's over?"

Her heart broke. She took a shaky breath.

"I don't know. Maybe," she whispered.

He stared at her in shock. His eyes lost all life.

Buffy turned. If she looked at him for another second she'd break. She'd stay and bring more destruction upon them.

"I need time to think," she declared.

She left before waiting for a reply.

* * *

Work was difficult. She couldn't focus. She gave a customer Sleepless in Seattle instead of Sleeping with the Enemy. The guy wasn't pleased and demanded that he receive a free movie, which led to her boss not being so pleased either.

As soon as she came home Dawn met her at the door. Buffy didn't bother taking off her coat or shoes. She knew from her sister's expression that something bad was up.

"Willow is gone!" Dawn explained.

"What? Weren't you home? Why didn't you stop her from leaving?" Buffy scolded.

As soon as Buffy said that she scanned Dawn for any injury. Flashbacks of the broken arm incident came to mind. What if Willow somehow used magic to harm Dawn in order to leave? She relaxed when she came up with no sign of her worry.

"She went upstairs to take a nap. A couple hours later I went to check on her and found her gone. Apparently she teleported out of the house or something. Or, she could have climbed out the window like you used to do."

Buffy nodded. She rubbed her temples, trying to think. Work, brain, work.

"You don't think she went out with Amy, do you?" Dawn asked.

"Oh God," Buffy said. "That's exactly where I think she went."

They were both silent for a moment as that sunk in. Buffy felt like letting herself give out, to just collapse. Nothing she did was making any difference whatsoever. It was times like this that she did shut down in a manner of perspective. She brought forth the slayer hundred percent.

"We have to get Spike."

"What? Why?"

Dawn gave her a 'duh' look. "He's the only one that can find Rack."

"No. We don't need him."

"I don't remember the exact location. We need him."

Buffy sighed. Dawn was right. They needed him. She reluctantly nodded.

* * *

They were almost to his crypt when Dawn asked, "Did you both have a fight?"

A fight would have been all right. No, it was far worse.

"Something like that, Dawnie."

Dawn shook her head. "It'll be all right. Nothing can be sunshine and roses all the time."

Buffy stared straight ahead into the darkness.

The slayer stopped abruptly when they reached the stone tomb. She rose her foot to kick the door in without even thinking. Dawn pulled her back.

"What are you doing?" Dawn demanded.

That was Buffy's breaking point. Tears escaped her eyes as the girl peeked through the slayer facade.

"This is worse than just a fight, isn't it? Did you two break up?"

"I don't know," Buffy choked.

Dawn gave her a hug.

"You wait her. I'll go get him. Take some time to compose yourself."

Buffy shook her head. "No, you're the one that should wait."

"Why?"

"Because he wasn't so presentable last time I was here asking for help with Rack."

At first Dawn didn't get it. Then a blush spread across her face.

Buffy crept inside. It was pitch black, but she knew the place by heart. She made her way to the trapdoor that led downstairs. She climbed down. The faint light of candles illuminated the bedroom. Good thing they weren't near wood or it would have been a big fire hazard.

She took a moment to gaze at the pale body on the bed. He was completely uncovered. His face was directed her way, eyes closed. He looked so innocent, like a little boy. She hated to wake him.

"Spike."

He didn't even stir.

"Spike?" This time she said his name louder.

Still nothing. She reached out and laid a hand on his arm. His eyes instantly popped open. She jumped backwards.

Spike sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed. He perched on the end, his head lifted to her.

"You sleep like the dead."

He raised an eyebrow. "Bit knackered. Had a long night."

Buffy ignored him. "Look, I need your help."

His expression darkened.

"Please, Spike. This has nothing to do with us. Willow is in trouble. Dawn and I really have to find her."

"The bit is with you?"

"Yeah."

Spike stood up. "Right then."

Dawn trailed behind her two favorite people. The blondes purposely kept their distance. She hated it. They both loved each other. Shouldn't that be enough? The quiet was really getting to her.

"So, uh, Spike? We should ya know, hang out."

Spike turned. "What was that?"

"You should come over and have a movie night with me or something. Bandits. Or, hey, Fast and the Furious."

He glanced at Buffy, unsure. "Depends on big sis."

Buffy gave Spike a long look. "Spike, I'm not putting a restraining order on you. Come by and see Dawn anytime you want."

Dawn smiled. Call her miss matchmaker. She knew that she could get them to get over whatever the problem was.

"Anything?" Buffy asked Spike.

"Not yet," Spike said.

Silence took over again.

Suddenly Spike halted. "Do you see something?"

Dawn searched the street. She couldn't find anything.

"No," Buffy said, apparently not seeing anything either.

Spike pointed. "There, comin closer."

"I think . . . "Buffy began. "Willow!"

Sure enough it was Willow. She stumbled toward them. When she reached them she crumpled to the ground, exhausted. Buffy knelt beside her.

"Are you okay? What happened?"

Expecting black-eyed Willow, Dawn was surprised to see happy Willow. The redhead had a proud smile plastered on her face.

"I got away!" she exclaimed. "I was strong and left!"

"What are you talkin about, Red?" Spike questioned.

"Rack did something to me. I felt . . . It was amazing. But then things got bad. I saw things. Horrible things. So I . . . " Her smile grew larger. She focused on her best friend. "I rejected it. The magic was so strong but I got away. I knew that if I didn't I'd lose myself."

Buffy grabbed Willow and hugged her. Buffy began to cry. Willow's mouth went slack and tears spilled over. Dawn took a staggering step and then lowered to join in. When they untangled Spike was gone.

* * *

The next night Buffy found herself on Spike's doorstep. She knocked and then wrapped her arms around herself. The door swung open after a moment. Spike stood there in a pair of unzipped jeans and nothing else.

"What are you doing here?"

The coldness in his voice startled her.

"I've been thinking," she said.

"About what?"

"About us."

Without feeling he said," Thought there wasn't an 'us'."

"I said I needed time. Well I took time and I've figured it out. I think maybe it was Willow who opened up my eyes." She met his intense gaze. His expression didn't change.

"She made me see that we can fight. Maybe we're drawn to the darkness but that doesn't mean we have to let it control us," she continued.

That got through to him. His blank mask fell away to be replaced by vulnerability. "Maybe you were right, though. The reason I had been avoiding you was because I didn't want to hurt you. The demon is always there, Buffy. It doesn't want to kill you anymore, but it bloody well doesn't want puppies and snuggles."

"I know that," Buffy said. She reached out and cupped his cheek. "I also know that you can be gentle. I believe you can be a good man, William, if you choose to be."

There was that look again. She remembered it down in the basement just before the bringers took him away. It had been so soulful. Wonder filled her that he could appear so soulful now when he very well couldn't be.

He shut his eyes. "Do you really believe that?"

"Yes. And I also believe that I can be a good woman for you. We can both be deserving of each other."

Buffy slid by him, grabbed his hand, and then pulled him along. He watched her with questioning as she led him through the dimly lit crypt. She let go of him to open the latch that led below and began to make her way down. She stopped at the top and gestured for him to follow. He complied without a word but she could sense his confusion.

When Buffy got to the bottom she turned. His bed was covered in black silken sheets. She smiled and went to them. She slipped into the unmade bed. Spike stared at her, desire flooding over him, but he didn't move to join her. She stretched out her hand.

"Come to me, William," she whispered. "Come make love to me."

"Buffy . . .?"

"It's all right."

Problem solved. Buffy had come to an enlightening solution to their dark nature. The only reason it got out of hand was because when one got violent the other did as well. She could train them to bring out the tenderness instead. If one began to loose it the other could bring them back.

Spike hesitantly sat on the bed. His left hand tangled in her hair. Her eyes fluttered with emotion.

"I love you," she breathed.

She got worried when he remained still. She looked up and got a glimpse of his wet face. He quickly turned away. She took his head and brought it back to face her.

"Don't be ashamed to show how you feel, baby."

"S' like a dream, pet. I dreamed of this so many times."

She tugged him down for a kiss. "So have I."

Their actions were slow and thoughtful. When he entered her it wasn't about wanting to feel. She 'already' felt. It was about manifesting emotions and reinforcing them. She got that now.

* * *

If you wanted to do something right, you had to do it yourself. That was Warren's new motto. Jonathan and Andrew were a mistake, only a liability. Sure Andrew could summon demons, and Jonathan . . . What did Jonathan even offer the team? Anyway, he didn't need them. He was stronger on his own.

It took him forever to move out of his parents' basement and find a new place. It took him longer to rebuild. Then he had to have a fit of rage thinking about the slayer and tear it up.

He sat in the rubble, his jaw twitching. He had to focus and not let his anger interfere with the mission.

* * *

That last part was just to let you know that Warren is still around. 


	19. Could Be Worse

REPLAY

Author: Heather Martin (SinisterChic)

Rating: PG13

Spoilers: Season 6, Season 7, Angel season 5

Summary: S/B, Learning of Spike's resurrection Dawn and she venture to LA in search of him. But they are too late. . . Or are they? Is there a way to fix things before they began to get dark?

Archive: Just let me know where

**Chapter 19- Could be Worse**

Buffy must have been the only person to ever relive her twenty-first birthday. Most people would have been thrilled to go back and visit their youth. Buffy, on the other hand, wasn't too keen on visiting any date that happened to be the anniversary of her birth. Even in her pre-slayer days something would go wrong, let it be parent quarreling or an earthquake. She was simply doomed to ever celebrate being alive in peace.

The alarm rang in her ear. Buffy shot the retched alarm clock a glare. She was very tempted to just close her eyes again. A naughty smile came to her lips. She could go to Spike's and sleep . . . er, 'spend the day in bed'.

There was a knock at her door. Buffy groaned.

"Who is it?" she called.

"Your sister. Can I come in? Spike didn't sneak in last night, did he?"

She giggled. "I wish, but no."

Dawn opened the door. She stepped in, laden with a tray. She set her load down on the slayer's lap, revealing eggs, toast, and bacon.

"I'll be right back with juice," Dawn informed.

The sight made Buffy salivate. It looked scrumptious. Still she had a bit of doubt.

"It isn't poisoned, is it?"

Dawn crossed her arms. "No," she said. "No worries, kay? This is going to be the best Buffy birthday bash ever."

"You don't feel rejected?"

"No wishes this time. You already killed the sword demon last night. There is nothing but clear skies ahead. Now eat before the food gets cold." Dawn hurried to fetch the orange juice.

Buffy took up the fork. She stabbed a bit of scrambled egg. Hesitantly she brought it up to her mouth. She let it enter and waited. Mmmm, it tasted good. She started to devour the rest of the meal.

Okay, something went right. Maybe this wouldn't be such a bad day after all. Miracles did happen sometimes.

"Oops!" Dawn yelled from downstairs. "I'll clean it up!"

Buffy banged her head back. Then again miracles only occurred rarely.

* * *

Buffy swung the front door open. She smiled in greeting.

"Hey, Tara."

They gave each other a hug. Tara handed her a small present.

"Thanks," Buffy said.

"So-So, how are you?"

"Nothing world shattering has happened yet." Buffy glanced at her watch. "Still got four hours left."

Tara hung up her coat. "Maybe this time will be different."

Just then Willow came down the stairs. The two witches stared nervously.

"I have to . . . uh, with the thing . . . ya know, the snacks. Yeah, snacks," Buffy rambled. She snuck away.

Willow made her way to the bottom of the stairs.

"Hey," Willow said.

"Hey," Tara replied. "How are you?"

"Good." She paused. "Better."

"I heard about what you did. I'm glad. Proud."

Hope sparkled in Willow's eyes. "Thanks. That means a lot."

* * *

Buffy hopped up as soon as she heard knocking. She opened the door to let Spike in. He carried a six pack of beer. She eyes it skeptically.

"Not really a wild party, Spike."

"I need it if I'm goin to be around the whelp."

Buffy shook her head.

Spike stepped aside. Clem entered, shyly.

"Hope you don't mind that I brought a friend."

Buffy grinned. "Of course not. Good to see you again, Clem."

The demon seemed surprised. "You remember me?"

"Of course. Come on in, join the fun."

Buffy stepped up and gave Spike a lingering kiss. She delved her tongue inside his mouth, tasting what could only be described of as home. He had a big smirk on his face when she pulled away.

"What?" she questioned.

"Nothing. Just maybe I should leave and come back more often if I get a greeting like that every time."

"Oh, shut up and come 'ere for more."

She pulled him back toward her.

* * *

Things were going too well. For one thing Richard wasn't around. Giles was here this time, which was a bonus. His present consisted of a leather-bound diary. He said it was to get her thoughts straight. No one got it except for her. She loved it. Dawn gave her a legitimate coat this time. Giles pitched in with the expense. Willow still gave her the uncertain back massager. She was delighted to receive the crafted weapon chest. Xander gave her a concerned look when she got teary eyed over it. It had been one of the mementos Buffy had missed most after Sunnydale's destruction.

Spike was last. He took her privately aside. At first she thought he was planning something crude. Instead he slipped her a small velvet box. She held it for a moment, basking in the realization that it clearly contained jewelry. She lifted the lid. Inside was a silver ring, displaying a joined moon and sun.

"What does it mean?"

"Tis a promise ring. Ya know, forever together and all that rot. Girls like that sort of thing. Well, normal girls. Maybe . . . If you don't . . ."

"No! I love it. Put it on me."

He blinked as she held out her left hand. He gingerly took the ring and slid it on her slim finger. She examined it in the light. She became mesmerized by it.

"Is it supposed to be us? The sun and moon?" she asked.

Spike grinned. He stroked her hand.

"It represents us, yeah. You belong in the light and I the darkness. Still we manage." He met her eyes. "You're the one, Buffy."

Her throat tightened.

"You all right, pet?"

She held back the tears. "Yes. I'm perfect."

* * *

"Bye, guys," Buffy said.

Xander and Anya bid their friend farewell for the night. Anya reached for the doorknob. She turned it but nothing happened.

"It seems stuck," the ex-vengeance demon declared.

"Let me try," Xander said.

He tried to exit with the same result.

Buffy shot Dawn a glance.

"Wasn't me," Dawn said.

Spike gave her a funny look. "Course it wasn't you, nibblet."

Slayers could sense evil. She could feel it now, somewhere lurking.

"This is my worst nightmare," Buffy muttered. Buffy shivered.

From her peripheral vision she spotted Spike. No, it wasn't, she realized. Things could be 'much' worse. Spike could be dust. At least she was stuck with the ones she loved.

* * *

Dawn's mind ran wildly. There had to be a way to get out of the house. There just had to be.

"If I had my books I could research," Giles said.

"I could try the net!" Willow exclaimed.

"Good idea, Will, start the hacker action," Xander said.

Xander noticed Anya as she sat off to the side. She was freaking out. She tugged at her collar and practically hyperventilated. He hurried over to her in attempt to sooth her panic attack.

"It's so hot in here," Anya complained. "God, I can't breathe."

"Take it easy, Ahn," Xander told her. He ran a hand over her hair. "We're all going to be all right."

"I've never been trapped like an animal before. This is ridiculous. If I were a vengeance demon I could transport out of here."

"Shhh," Xander shushed his fiancé.

A vengeance demon, that was it! Eureka! Dawn couldn't help the glee that spread through her. She had the solution.

"Hey, Anya!"

Anya whipped her head around.

"Vengeance demons wear necklaces, right?"

Anya nodded. "Yeah, so?"

"I think there was one at my school. She tried to get me to make a wish but I wouldn't. She had a pendant with a blue stone."

"Oh for crying out loud!"

"Yeah, do you know her? You could call her here and we could wish whatever is locking us in here away."

The ex-demon stood up. She stared up at the ceiling. "Halfrek! Hallie, get your ass down here!"

A puff of smoke emerged in the middle of the living room. When it faded a woman became revealed. She wore a black dress and had wavy hair. She scanned the crowd.

"You rang?"

"Hallie, we need your help."

Halfrek crossed her arms. "I don't answer just any wish, you kno- . . ." She stopped. Her eyes landed on Spike. "William?"

A frown came to Spike's lips. "Wait a minute."

Buffy looked at Hallie and then Spike. "You know each other?" Her voice sounded more jealous than she intended.

Spike grabbed her hand. He gave her a deep look. "Was a long time ago, luv."

An amused expression came to Halfrek. She tore her gaze away from Spike and focused back on Anya.

Dawn took a step forward. "I wish for whatever keeping us here banished."

"Oh, very well, since it was you who asked. I am fond of little girls." Dawn didn't look too fond of the 'little girl' comment. "Wish granted."

Another puff of smoke filtered through the house. Hallrek disappeared. Buffy turned warily toward the door.

"Do you think it worked?"

Spike let go of Buffy. He went over to check the door. It opened easily.

"Coast is clear," he said.

Giles was the last to leave. He gave Buffy a meaningful look.

"You don't deserve these burdened Birthdays. Maybe we should set up protective wards next time," he suggested.

She smiled slightly.

"Not a bad idea."

He gave her a fatherly hug. "Regardless, happy Birthday."

"Thanks."

Pulling away, he slipped on his coat.

"Giles?"

He turned. "Yes?"

Her face fell. "Something was here. I felt it. It's gone now, but I don't think Halfrek got rid of it for good."

"Was it something you dealt with before?"

She shook her head. "No. This is new."

* * *

Ah, what is it!? 


	20. As You Are

REPLAY

Author: Heather Martin (SinisterChic)

Rating: PG13

Spoilers: Season 6, Season 7, Angel season 5

Summary: S/B, Learning of Spike's resurrection Dawn and she venture to LA in search of him. But they are too late. . . Or are they? Is there a way to fix things before they began to get dark?

Archive: Just let me know where

**Chapter 20- As You Are**

Munching on some corn chips, Xander kept his eyes glued to the dance floor. "Look at them. So . . . steamy. It makes my skin crawl."

The sound of music boomed through the club. Lots of young couples danced away to it. There was one couple that stood out amongst them, that of a pair of blondes. They gyrated to the heavy beat, oblivious to everything else around them.

A sound of irritation came from Anya. She reached over and snatched the snack bag away from her fiancé. "Can you take your attention away from Spike and Buffy, and put your focus on more important matters? Like the wedding. We only have a miniscule amount of time left before the big day. The seating is way off. It has to be fixed."

Xander tore his gaze away from the writhing bodies. "Sorry. I can't help it. I can't believe she'd voluntarily touch the bleached undead. All those times I told him he didn't have a chance. Every time I see them together I want to pull them apart and knock some sense into her." He gestured to his best friend and the vampire. "Why him? I know one of these days he's going to turn on us."

"Oh, quit!" Anya shook her head. She dug into the Doritos bag. "Have you ever seen Buffy so happy?"

"No, and that's my point. When he does pull an Angelus on her, the loss it going to tear her to pieces."

"That's her business, Xander. Not yours. She needs to make her own decisions. Now, where should we put your uncle?"

He sighed. "It isn't the table settings; it's the arrangements that need to be redone. We can't have my family so close to your friends."

"Well we can't put up a brick wall to separate them." She paused. "Can we?"

Xander took the sack of chips back. "I think I love that plan. Why did we ever invite 'everyone'? I'd be perfectly happy with just the gang."

"The invitations have already been sent out."

"I know that . . . I'm just saying . . ."

"Stop eating! You eat when you're nervous."

"So do you," he pointed out.

Anya pouted, aware that he was right. After a moment she gave in and stole a chip. They both wallowed in wedding woes, pigging out on fattening junk food.

* * *

Dawn was having a blast. Everyone she loved was all together at the Bronze. Well, except Tara. She went over to Willow and handed her a soda.

"How are Mr. and Mrs. High Strung?" Willow questioned.

"I'm betting they explode," Dawn said. She took a sip of her drink.

"You know, when I was little, I used to spend hours imagining what my wedding to Xander would be like. Now I look at them . . . I just think . . . Nee-hee-hee!"

Dawn giggled at that. "You seem chipper."

"Can't hide it." Willow grinned.

"Is it because of Tara?"

"Partly."

"You gonna call her and invite her over?"

"Not yet. But if I did she wouldn't hang up."

"That's progress."

"Hence the happy."

All of a sudden hands reached out and grabbed Dawn. She squealed in surprise. Willow rescued the girl's drink before it spilled all over.

"Come on, bit. Get your groove on with us," Spike demanded. He dragged the teen off with him. "You too, Willow."

Willow set the drinks down and joined them. Dawn and her spun around together with the music.

* * *

She smiled as she recognized the title. "That one's a good one," she said while scanning the movie through.

The girl's eyes lit up, clearly glad she chose well. "Really?"

"Definitely one of my favorites. I'm normally an action gal, but this one is great. Sure it is a chick flick, but there is also sword fights and stuff."

"Cool."

The customer paid. Buffy handed the girl The Princess Bride. "Thanks and enjoy."

Buffy turned toward the returned videos, prepared to put them away. She sensed someone approach the counter.

"H-" She met the person's eyes. "-Hi!"

She gaped up at Riley Finn. The first thing she noticed was the scar across his left eye. She wondered again how it happened. He was dressed all in black, complete with a bulletproof vest. She didn't know what she felt at that moment. What was the date? How could it have slipped her mind that today was the day her ex came back to town?

"Hey," Riley said in greeting. His voice was anything but glad, his expression grim.

"H-hey," she stammered.

"Sorry to drop in on you, Buffy."

She got her brain to work a little. "That's okay."

"Look, this isn't the way I wanted it. But something's come up, something big. We don't have much time. You understand?"

"Uh, I think so."

God he was tall. He hovered over her, making her feel dwarf size. Spike never made her feel that way. Oh, God, Spike! How would he react to Riley Finn showing up? You know exactly how, Buffy. He's going to gloat and throw your relationship in his face. Oh well. Let him.

"You're working. I should have anticipated this."

"I can't just leave," Buffy said. She was the only one there at the moment. It was a Tuesday, one of the video rental store's slowest days. She glanced at the clock. 7:46.

"Of course."

"But-But I close up at eight tonight. I can leave then."

He nodded. "I'll wait outside then."

"O-kay."

She watched him retreat out the door. She let out a sigh of relief. At least she didn't have a cow on her head. She glanced down at her gray shirt and jeans. Why did she pick the gray t-shirt? She ran her fingers through her long locks.

The remaining fourteen minutes seemed to last forever. No one else entered the store that night, which she was thankful for. She locked up on record time. She grabbed her coat, fingering the stake within her pocket. She met up with Riley outside the door.

"So, what's the what?"

"Suvolte demon. Rare, lethal ... nearly extinct, but not nearly enough." He took out a device. It beeped, obviously telling Riley some kind of useful information. Buffy couldn't decipher how or what. "It's close."

Buffy cracked a smile. "You're like James Bond. It's so cute."

Was she flirting? Stop, Buffy, stop. He's married. And remember Spike.

He put the strange gadget away. "We've been tear-assing through every jungle from Paraguay up, taking out nests. As soon as we put one Suvolte down, a dozen take its place. They're breeders, Buffy. One turns into ten, ten becomes a hundred. This gets out of hand and there's a war with humans? Humans are gonna lose."

She simply nodded, leaving the tribble comment out of it.

"We should drive," Riley commented. "It'd be faster."

They loaded up in the black vehicle. Buffy ran her hand over the SUV's leather upholstery.

"Nice wheels."

For the first time Riley smiled. "Came with the car."

She smiled back.

"I take it you know where we're going."

"Got an idea. The tag's on-line. We'll find it," he said. He watched the road. "Listen, if we ever get a minute I've got some stories to tell you."

She shifted in her seat. "I've got some stuff to tell you too. Some you wouldn't believe." The last part was in a whisper.

Riley reached behind the seat. He handed her some clothing.

"Here. This is black ops."

She eyed the questionable attire. "Ninja wear?"

"Battle gear. Lightweight Kevlar, state of the art."

Buffy remembered the outfit being itchy. She didn't want to argue with Riley, though, so she complied anyway.

"Don't look," she warned.

"Perfect gentleman."

They were silent awhile. Buffy changed as quickly as possible.

"You know, there's not many people I'd ask to risk their life for me, Buffy. It's really good to see you."

"Thanks. It's good to see you as well."

Miraculously it was. It was easier this time around. She knew what to expect. And the fact that she had her own honey waiting for her didn't hurt.

The car screeched to a halt. They got out and made their way to the dam wall. When she held on to Riley as they slid down, she didn't hold on so tight.

Riley detached the line from his belt when they hit the bottom. They ducked past a large pipe. A ways down was a ladder. Out of nowhere a demon jumped out. It tackled Riley from behind. He threw it off.

She had forgotten how vile the creature was. It slobbered and stunk. She attacked the thing, but was thrown aside. It went back at Riley. She got up and kicked at it until it fell off. It recovered quickly, hitting them both. They smashed into the stone wall. Then Riley got hit in the stomach. He grunted in pain.

"Riley!"

The slayer grabbed Riley and used him for leverage to lift both her feet. She smacked them into the demon. It fell to the ground.

A woman jumped down beside them. She straightened. Buffy took her in. She wore a battle gear outfit like Riley, and wow, she could pull it off. She glanced down at herself, feeling foolish in the suit.

"Hey there!" Sam called. "What exactly are you doing with my husband?"

Buffy took a step away from Riley. Nothing, absolutely nothing, her mind cried.

"Buffy, meet Sam. Sam, meet Buffy," Riley said.

Sam smiled. She held out her hand. "Pleasure."

"Demon," Buffy said.

The demon had gotten up off the ground. It snarled at the triad.

Don't kill it, she told herself.

Sam rushed at the demon. "Mine."

Buffy watched the fight. "She's good."

"She's a special one."

Buffy remained silent.

"I meant to tell you," he went on.

"I know."

The demon hit Sam across the face. She went down. Riley grabbed a discarded taser. He aimed, but didn't get a chance to fire. The gun went flying, and then him as well.

Screw not killing the demon! Slayers did what had to be done. She entered the fight. She grappled with the demon before getting the upper hand. She broke the Suvolte's neck.

Buffy panted. "Sorry, guys. You might not have wanted me to kill it."

Sam shook her head. "No, that's okay. It was good you did. It would have got us all given the chance."

* * *

Buffy and Sam made their way through the cemetery. Their mission was to find the Suvolte nest by Riley's request.

"Thanks for letting me tag along," Sam said.

"No problem."

"Maybe not for you. I gotta tell you, Buffy, I'm a little bit intimidated. I mean, patrolling with the real live Slayer, you're like ... Santa Claus, or Buddha, or something."

What was she supposed to say to that?

"You're legendary. And it's not just slayer status I'm talking about. It's you," Sam continued.

"Riley talks about me?"

"He didn't say anything for a long time, but I could tell. He was ripped up inside."

Buffy looked down at her feet. "I'm glad he has you."

"More like miraculous. I went down to Central America with the Peace Corps. One night, my entire infirmary got slaughtered by..." Sam shook her head. "I didn't know what they were. I got saved, quit the Corps, joined the squad. My first firefight, I met Riley.We started talking, you know, first about tactics, missions, stuff like that. And then about you."

"He thinks ... I let him go."

"Do you wish you hadn't?"

What a question. Buffy thought about that one. Really thought about it. She glanced at Sam, the perfect woman. Buffy realized something then. She could never be perfect. She didn't want to be perfect. She didn't want someone who wanted perfect. She wanted to be herself. She wanted someone who wanted her to be imperfect. Just Buffy, slayer, girl, and all.

"I just regret giving him pain." A smile formed on Buffy's lips. "But I don't regret where we both are now. He's moved on to something good. And so have I."

"So, you seeing anyone new? Someone special?" Sam asked.

Warmth spread through Buffy. "Yeah. Someone special."

They stopped walking.

"Good," Sam told her. "I'm glad."

Thoughts of Spike led Buffy to a realization. Spike was connected to the Sulvolte eggs. But he wouldn't . . . Not after . . .

"Sam. You know what? Um, I think we should split up," Buffy blurted.

"Oh, I'm slowing you down. I knew I would, this was just selfish of me," Sam apologized.

"No! Nothing like that. There's this guy. He might know where to find the nest."

"Cool. I'm guessing Finn needs me about now." She glanced around at the graves. "He's probably off somewhere gettin' his ass kicked. You know how wild he gets." She backed away. "Don't worry about Rye and me, we're good."

Buffy paused outside Spike's crypt. Her heart raced. She was scared to go in. She was scared of what she would find. She kept telling herself that Spike wouldn't let her down this time. He couldn't. She didn't know what she would do if he did.

She opened the door and stepped in. She found Spike perched on the edge of his sarcophagus. He glanced up from his book. She took note that it was a compilation of poetry. Poetry?

Spike put the book aside. He smiled at her and hopped down. "Hello, luv. Wasn't expecting you. Pleasant surprise and all."

She came up to him. She met him with pleading eyes. "Tell me you love me."

He cocked his head. "I love you. You know I do."

"You wouldn't do anything to hurt me?"

Worry crept across his gaze. "Is something bothering you?"

"I love you." It came out in a choked sob.

He hushed her. His cold lips came down on her warm ones. She surrendered to the touch. She needed assurance that everything would be all right. Please, Spike, tell me it will be all right. You aren't bad. I know you can be good for me.

Spike's hand ventured to her breast. She broke away. He gave her a confused look.

"Not here." She gathered her courage. She swallowed. "Let's go. . . down to the bed."

She saw a glimpse of hesitation and her heart sank. No, please no.

"You don't mind, do you?"

Spike cupped her cheek. "Course not." He took her hand. "Come on."

He led her down to the lower level. She surveyed the bedroom. It was clean. Tears slipped from her eyes.

"Buffy?" Spike asked in concern.

She hugged him. She cried into his dark shirt. "Oh, God, Spike. I was so scared. But everything is all right."

He held her to him, completely baffled. He didn't ask her what it was all about. He simply told her it was okay.

She was so relieved, and so built up with emotion. She couldn't hold it in anymore. She knew she shouldn't. They had demons to find. But she didn't care. She began to remove his clothing.

Afterward, Buffy and Spike cuddled together. Suddenly the trap door came open. Footsteps came down the ladder. Buffy immediately sat up with a gasp. She hugged the sheets to her naked body.

Spike rose as well. He glared at the soldier. "What are you doing here?"

Buffy shook. Spike put his arm around her, which helped a little.

Riley didn't respond. He tried to keep his eyes averted.

"Must sting, huh? Me and your former? Must kill."

"That's not why I'm here," Riley said. He lifted his gun and turned toward Spike. "Doctor."

Buffy was so embarrassed. She reached for her clothes and started to dress.

"I thought we ran you out of town," Spike told Riley. "Last time I saw you, if memory serves, you were getting the juice sucked out of you by some undead ladies of very questionable reputation. Be a good tin soldier and push off."

Riley remained collected. "Where are they, Doctor?"

Spike furrowed his brow. "Why do you keep calling me that?" He got off the bed to put on his pants.

"Glad to be back in Sunnydale. The locals all speak English, and I know who to beat for information. It's all brought me here."

Fastening his belt, Spike said, "You must have heard wrong." He gestured to the bedroom. "Nothing is here as you can see."

"Where are the eggs, Spike?"

"Eggs?"

Buffy came forward. "It can't be Spike," she insisted.

Riley punched Spike in the nose. Buffy stepped between the two.

"Riley, it isn't Spike," she repeated. "There isn't anything here."

"They must be somewhere else then," Riley said.

"What are you lookin for anyway?" Spike asked. It was mostly directed at Buffy.

"Solvolte demon eggs," Buffy said.

Spike's eyes widened.

"You think I'd keep them here? You know me better than that."

"I do. I know you. I just . . ."

Spike took her hand. "It's all right, luv."

The vampire looked at Riley. "I know where your Solvolte nest is."

Riley pointed his gun. "Lead me to them, Doctor."

Anger rose up in Spike. Buffy could feel it coming off of him in waves.

"You, git! I'm not the doctor. I was given the chance to keep the eggs for a friend, but I declined." He squeezed Buffy's palm. "Knew it'd hurt my lady. I'll give you the eggs, but I'm not leading you to them. You'll rush in there and blow the place to pieces. I owe my mate better than that."

Riley's eyes darkened. "It's a demon, Buffy. That's what they deserve."

Buffy shook her head. She addressed her boyfriend. "I'll go with you. We'll collect the eggs together. I promise to leave your friend alone."

Spike smiled. "Right then."

"Buffy?" Riley protested.

The slayer's resolve face was firm. "Meet me at the Magic Box."

* * *

It turned out to be a poker buddy of Spike's. The bumpy-skinned demon apparently wasn't having the best of luck at cards. He wasn't happy about the violation of his home but didn't fight them.

The eggs had been properly frozen this time. It was a cinch to gather them and hand them over.

* * *

Buffy walked alone with Riley.

"So, where are you and Sam headed now?"

"Nepal."

"Sounds fun."

"I'll send a postcard."

They both stopped.

"Buffy-"

"Riley-"

She let him go first.

"I'm done here. I was supposed to take out the Doctor, but if you don't want me to . . ."

"I'll keep an eye on him. He's mostly harmless."

Riley nodded.

"So you and Spike are-" Riley couldn't finish the sentence.

"Yeah. But it's more than that." She took in a breath. "I love him."

He blinked.

"Speechless, I gather."

"I wish you luck," he said. "I hope you never have to take him out."

She froze, stunned. "Not the reaction I was anticipating."

"I don't like seeing you with that idiot."

She smiled a little.

"But he makes you happy. You glow."

"I do?" she asked, amazed.

"Not that you didn't before. But-"

"I get it." She paused. "So, we're good."

"I guess so."

Buffy bid the happy couple farewell. She watched the helicopter depart into the night sky with satisfaction. She'd never have perfection like Riley and Sam, but she had what she wanted.

That was long, you guys. Hope you liked.


	21. Going to the Chapel and

REPLAY

Author: Heather Martin (SinisterChic)

Rating: PG13

Spoilers: Season 6, Season 7, Angel season 5

Summary: S/B, Learning of Spike's resurrection Dawn and she venture to LA in search of him. But they are too late. . . Or are they? Is there a way to fix things before they began to get dark?

Archive: Just let me know where

**Chapter 21- Going to the Chapel And . . .**

"Is it too small?"

Buffy stood behind Xander. She fumbled with his cummerbund.

"It'll fit," Buffy declared with confidence.

"Aw, man, what if it doesn't?" He gazed into the mirror. "What if I can't wear my cummerbund? And then the whole world will be able to see the place where my pants meet my shirt. Buffy, that can not happen! I must wear das cummerbund!"

A slight smile tugged at Buffy's lips. She couldn't help it. He was so cute. She gave the cummerbund a tug. Oh, she got it! Her smile grew into a triumphant grin.

"And so you shall!"

"Hey, you got it!"

"Slayer strength."

"I've been meaning to lay off the habit forming oxygen."

Buffy stepped back and admired him. Willow hadn't lied. Xander wore formal wear well. He looked very grown up and handsome.

"You look great," she announced. "Mr. Ready to get married. You are ready, right?"

Please don't let my attempts be in vain? she silently pleaded.

He nodded. "Very ready."

He seemed sincerely happy. She began to fight with the bowtie. Ugh, she still couldn't get it right.

"If only Willow wasn't off flirting with Tara," Buffy mumbled.

Xander glanced down at her. "She told you about her plans?"

Caught off guard, Buffy said, "Uh . . . yeah."

It took great effort but Buffy was able to get the bowtie. She knew exactly where his shoes were this time, which was definitely a bonus.

"All done. You look ready to get married," she told him.

His eyes roamed down at himself. "I think you're right."

There was so much to do, but together Dawn and her worked it out. She had the most important job: keep tabs on Xander at all times. Dawn's duty was to try and keep order. If that became too much, which was very much a possibility, she would go for help.

Xander and Buffy headed down the hall. Dawn suddenly came into view. The teen practically bounced with energy.

"Spike is here!" she squealed. "He's looking for you."

A glow spread across the slayer's face, which wasn't lost by Xander or Dawn.

Buffy ran a hand over the hideous green dress. She wished she had something gorgeous to show off to him. Maybe one day she'd have her chance, but in a flowing white . . . Oh, she was being a silly girl now, off in her own daydreams. She remembered those from when she had been with Angel: marriage, children, and a little house with a picket fence away from the forces of evil. Things just didn't work out that way. There was no way she was ever going to get married to Spike. Not that she didn't want to. She did very much, but vampires and slayers just didn't get hitched. But then again, they had never followed conventionality.

A nudge hit Buffy in the arm. "Buffy, are you off in la la land?" her sister asked.

Buffy blinked, coming back to the here and now.

"Go on, Buff, be merry. I better go meet and greet," Xander said.

She was surprised. Xander was encouraging her to go talk to Spike?

Buffy found Spike aloof from the crowd. She took a moment to look back and make sure Xander was still in sight. He was shaking hands with one of the guests. She turned back toward her boyfriend.

He smirked and went up to her. "You look lovely. All glowing."

"That's because the dress is radioactive."

They both laughed as one.

"I love seeing you happy," he told her.

She sobered. "You make me so."

He pressed his forehead against hers. "Is that right?"

Her arms slipped around his neck. "I love you."

"Oh, pet . . . You know I love you back. Save me a dance?"

"I'm all yours."

When Buffy turned around she had to search the crowd. She even made her way through it. It was useless . . . Xander was gone.

Willow confirmed Buffy's belief. Xander had fled the scene. The witch offered to go search while Buffy stalled. Buffy agreed, but with a heavy heart. She was finally happy. Why couldn't Xander and Anya be as well?

It was all a disaster. She watched as Tara hurried after Anya.

"Anya, wait up!" Tara called.

"This bride waits for no one. If the minister isn't here yet then we'll just get married without a minister," Anya said.

Buffy stepped off stage, abandoning the microphone. Spike appeared next to her side.

"Has the whelp flown the coop?"

She glared as a response. That made him shut-up.

Anya turned toward Buffy. She put her hands on her hips. "Where is Xander?" she demanded.

Buffy opened her mouth, not sure what to say. Chaos erupted throughout the guests. Anya stood there, about ready to cry. Tara rushed into the brawl in an attempt to maintain order. Dawn came over.

"I'm sorry, Buffy, I tried," the smallest Summers apologized.

"It's okay," Buffy said. No, it really wasn't.

"Who's that?" Anya pointed to an old man.

Buffy's eyes grew large. She knew him. She walked over.

"Hey, you! You weren't invited!" Buffy accused.

"I saw you talking to Xander," Anya said, coming up behind Buffy. "What did you say to him?"

The man remained stoic. "Really doesn't matter now, does it? It's done."

"Oh, it matters," Buffy said. "It matters a lot."

Buffy tore the bottom of her dress. She readied herself for a fight. "Show who you really are."

The man dissolved, growing into a monstrous demon. He had gray skin, yellow eyes, and spikes on his head. Buffy kicked him in the leg. He howled.

Just then Xander burst in.

"Anya!" he yelled.

"Xander." His fiancé ran into his arms.

"I'm so ... I'm so glad you're here. It was all lies, what he showed you ... it wasn't true, he just wanted to break us up," Anya explained.

He watched Buffy and the demon. "It doesn't matter now."

Buffy looked over at Spike. "Can you grab that?" Buffy pointed to the veil on the mounted bison head.

The vampire snatched up the material and handed it to her. Buffy used it to wrap around the demon's neck. It sputtered and struggled. Xander grabbed a pillar and smashed it into its head. Finally the thing went limp.

"It's dead," he declared.

"Yep," Buffy agreed.

Cheers and applause came from the crowd. Buffy stared in bafflement.

"Is anyone else waiting for it to go poof?" Willow said. She stared down at the corpse. "Maybe we could cover it with flowers."

Anya barked orders at the people. They sat back down in their seats. Buffy noticed Xander's state. He was sweaty and shaking. She pulled him away from the mess.

They stood in the corridor for a moment in silence.

"Xander?"

His head shot up.

"What happened?" She made her voice soothing.

"It wasn't real," he muttered.

"No."

"But it could be."

She touched his arm.

"No. I know you, Xander. I know you'll make Anya happy."

He shut his eyes. "I was so much like 'him'. I hated myself."

She didn't have to ask for clarification. Xander's worst nightmare had been shown. He had become his father.

"There is only the here and now. You can make the future into whatever you want. Make the decision to not be like that."

He opened his eyes. She was getting through to him.

"Life is full of chances," she went on. "You can't spend your entire life standing in one place."

Xander reached out. He hugged her harshly with emotion. They didn't pull away for a long while.

"I don't want to hurt Anya," he said.

"Then don't." It was such a simple answer.

Xander didn't move for a moment. Then he nodded.

"Okay."

Okay? Okay!

She sighed in relief. She'd done it. Xander was getting married.

"Let's get to it then," she said with a smile.

They turned to go back to the others. Buffy stumbled. She put a hand to her head. The world spun around her. What was going on?

"Buffy?"

Xander's voice was far away. Things went out of focus and then faded entirely. She didn't even feel herself hit the floor.

* * *

This is the turning point, guys. : ) Don't be too panicky when you read the next chapter. Have faith. Sounds vague, I know, but you'll know what I mean when you start it. 


	22. When it all Falls Down

REPLAY

Author: Heather Martin (SinisterChic)

Rating: PG13

Spoilers: Season 6, Season 7, Angel season 5

Summary: S/B, Learning of Spike's resurrection Dawn and she venture to LA in search of him. But they are too late. . . Or are they? Is there a way to fix things before they began to get dark?

Archive: Just let me know where

**Chapter 22- When it all Falls Down**

Hearing came back first. Words floated into her ears and she concentrated on them. They came from Dawn, she realized. They also seemed to be directed at her.

". . . days. Please, Buffy, wake up. You're the only one I have left. Everyone has left me. Don't leave me too." She let out a sob. "Don't leave me again."

Buffy struggled to move but found she couldn't It was as if she were a rock, heavy and stiff.

"I don't know what to do," dawn continued. "No one knows what will help you. They say nothing is physically wrong. So then . . . Why won't you wake up?"

I'm trying, Dawnie, just give me time.

Suddenly Dawn cried out, "Giles! Giles, come quick!"

The door creaked open. There were footsteps.

"Has something happened?"

That was Giles all right.

"Her hand twitched!" Dawn burst out.

It did? Wow, Buffy thought, I wasn't even aware of that.

"Are you positive?"

"Yes. Does that mean she'll be okay soon?"

Was that the sound of Giles polishing his glasses? She inwardly smiled. Figured.

"I'm not sure. This whole thing is a puzzle. We have to simply wait it out."

Waiting took hours. Boring hours because Giles left and Dawn had stopped talking. The only sound was the door as her sister left and returned. Buffy was determined to open her eyes. The blackness was getting old.

Finally it happened. Buffy's eyes fluttered. It took great effort, but she was able to keep them open. There was a moan. It took her a moment to figure out it came from herself.

"Dawnie?" Her voice was hoarse from nonuse.

The girl had fallen asleep near the bed. She slumped over, her head rested on the nightstand.

Well, she could see, now what? Do I just lie here?

"Dawn." This time the name came out louder and clearer.

Dawn's head shot up. She almost fell out of the chair when she got a look at Buffy. She gasped.

"Buffy, you're awake!"

Dawn jumped up to wrap her arms around the slayer. Buffy held her back, her hand stroking her hair.

"I was so scared," Dawn said with emotion.

"How-How long have I been asleep?" Buffy asked.

Dawn pulled back. "Over a week. I called Giles. He's here."

"Giles?"

"I'll go get him!"

Dawn raced out.

Buffy sat up a little and winced. She got a good look at the room. The bed was huge. It was made of dark wood and covered in a red blanket. The lamp on the nightstand lit up her surroundings in an eerie dim glow. Across the room hung a picture. It showed a girl in armor. Joan of Arc, she guessed. Fancy place. But where was it?

The door swung open. Dawn walked in, along with Giles.

"Buffy, dear, I'm so glad to see you awake," Giles said.

"Where am I?" Buffy quickly asked. Argh, her head hurt.

Giles cleared his throat. "The Hyperion."

That was an unexpected answer.

"Huh? Okay, how did I end up here?"

The other occupants shared a concerned look. The exchange unnerved her.

"What is the last thing you remember?" Giles asked her.

She narrowed her eyes. "Xander's wedding. What did I miss? Dawn says it's only been a week."

"Dear lord."

Oh no, things were never good when he muttered that phrase.

"Spit it out. What is going on?"

"Does she have amnesia?" Dawn questioned Giles.

A laugh spilled out of Buffy. Their expressions turned even more worried.

Giles removed his glasses. Surprisingly he simply held them as he spoke. "Possibly the stress was too much for her."

"You guys are being cryptic," Buffy said. "Send someone in who will tell it to me straight up. Go get Spike."

Dawn froze and Giles turned his head away.

"This is direr than we imagined," Giles whispered.

"Stop not talking to me. Hello, I'm in the room!"

Giles looked over, gravely. "Spike isn't here."

She blinked. "Okay, so he's in Sunnydale. Why am I not there too?"

"Sunnydale is gone," he told her flatly.

The whole world crashed down upon her. Buffy shoved off the covers and swung her legs over the side of the mattress. She got up. Her legs supported her weight with no trouble, thanks to slayer recovery. A lacy nightgown hung over her. She really wasn't fond of girly sleepwear. Who picked this out for her?

"Buffy, maybe you should take it easy."

She ignored him. "Where is Spike?" she demanded.

Dawn began to cry.

"No," Buffy whispered. She shook her head. This wasn't happening. Her eyes stung.

She directed her gaze on Dawn. "You sent us back. I changed things. We were together. Don't tell me that was all a lie."

"You've been in a coma for days, Buffy. Who knows what the mind can conjure up," Giles reasoned.

"No. No. I don't believe that. It was real. I could feel him, touch him."

"Buffy, you have to let him go."

"No!"

He moved toward her. She stepped back. He wanted it to be a lie. He wanted Spike to be dust. Oh God!

Another person entered the room. Through her swimming vision she made out Angel. Seeking for comfort, she ran into his arms. His strong arms went around her, holding her up.

"Angel, tell them I'm right! I went back in time! I changed things for the better! Willow overcame her addiction, Xander married Anya, and Spike . . ." She berried her face in his chest. She quickly pushed back as if burned.

"You're warm!" It came out as an accusation.

Angel's lips tugged upward. "I'm human, Buffy. I didn't realize it at first. I shanshued after the battle. We can finally be together."

She was dizzy, so dizzy. She crumpled to the ground.

"Buffy?" Angel asked.

This was all wrong. It wasn't supposed to happen like this. She couldn't have imagined it all. It had been too real, too potent. She remembered Spike's mouth as he brushed it against hers, his body pressed to hers, his words as he whispered lovingly in her ear. And they were telling her that this gray world was the real one.

"This isn't real. This isn't real." It turned into a mantra.

"I thought this was what you wanted," Angel said.

She put her hands over her ears. Angel was human? No, he hadn't been warm when she had carried him away form the alley. Buffy took in the scene of her friends and sister. Dawn was wearing the same outfit as that day. Why would she be wearing the same clothes a week later?

"This isn't real!" She picked herself up and dried her tears. There was nothing to cry about because Spike was alive. The room flickered, moving in and out of darkness.

"Who is doing this! Show yourself!" she yelled.

Things went black.

Okay, maybe I am a tad bit evil. L


	23. When it all Comes Together Again

REPLAY

Author: Heather Martin (SinisterChic)

Rating: PG13

Spoilers: Season 6, Season 7, Angel season 5

Summary: S/B, Learning of Spike's resurrection Dawn and she venture to LA in search of him. But they are too late. . . Or are they? Is there a way to fix things before they began to get dark?

Archive: Just let me know where

**Chapter 23- When it all Comes Together Again**

As soon as it became dark it switched to a brilliant white. Buffy moaned and then opened her eyes into slits. She turned her head in protest against the light.

"Buffy's awake!"

Buffy recognized the voice as Anya. Anya! The Anya that would have been dead if she were still in that fake world. She instantly sat up. She discovered that she was in Xander's car. They traveled through town, heading in the direction of Revello Drive.

Xander looked back from the front seat. "Buffy, we were worried."

"I'm so glad to see you guys!" Buffy burst out. She reached around the seat to hug her best friend.

"This is nice, Buff, but I kinda need to drive."

Buffy sheepishly let go. "Sorry."

"What happened?" Anya asked. "Xander said that you suddenly fainted."

Sitting back, Buffy said, "Yeah. It was weird. I was in a world of lies."

"Lies?"

"Uh huh. We're going to have to research it. Maybe it's because of Warren."

"He hasn't showed in awhile," Xander remarked.

"Just about time for him to pop back up," Buffy said. She leaned forward. "So, what happened while I was out of it? I didn't miss out on you walking down the aisle, did I?"

Xander glanced at her. "Nah, how could I get married without you? Besides, you became top priority."

"Yes," agreed Anya. She grabbed her fiancé's hand. "I have learned from humans that sometimes others come first. But Xander assures me that eventually we will be the main concern."

The car pulled into the Summer's driveway. Buffy opened the door and jumped out. Anya and Xander followed.

Xander came to her side. "Are you okay? Can you manage?"

"I feel fine," Buffy said.

She got out the keys in her jeans pocket. She went up to the door and unlocked it. She flipped the light switch. All of a sudden she felt Xander take hold of her arm. He steered her toward the couch.

"You should sit down. We don't know what caused your episode. What if you have another one?" Xander said.

"Xander is wise. You should listen," Anya said.

Buffy shook her head. "Fine, fine," she humored them.

She had just sat down when the front door burst open. A blurred figure stomped on a leather coat. After the smoke had vanished he lifted his head. His penetrating eyes found hers. It only took a second for him to reach her side.

"Buffy, luv, are you all right?" His hands searched for any injuries. "I wanted to ride with you but the sun was out. Had to take the Desoto."

Buffy crushed him to her. She inhaled deeply. He smelled like cigarette smoke and alcohol. Her nose smashed against his hard chest. He was solid, he was real.

"Oh, Spike," she choked.

The vampire stared down at her with concern. He lifted an eyebrow. She was soaking his red shirt with her tears.

Four more people entered the house.

"We finally got here," Willow announced. "How is she doing?"

Buffy pulled away slightly from Spike. She turned to find Willow, Giles, Tara, and Dawn. "She's doing okay."

Dawn rushed at her sister. "All I could think of was Mom."

Buffy hushed her. "I'm not sick, Dawnie, I promise. Something mystical is doing this. I was sent somewhere imaginary. It was like something wanted me to believe lies."

"Well, if it's demony I can so help," Willow said brightly. She ran upstairs to fetch her computer.

Giles cleared his throat. "I think I'll go back to the Magic Box. Technology is unreliable." He headed to the door but stopped. "Before I uh go . . . Could I have a hug?"

"Ah, of course." Buffy stood up and went to him. She gave him a tight squeeze.

He winced. "I have no doubt you're in fine shape."

"Too much with the slayer strength?"

"Quite so."

"Sorry."

He smiled and then touched her face. "I'll be back as soon as I find something out."

As soon as he left Dawn addressed the crowd. "How many of you are with me that Willow comes up with something first?"

Everyone raised their hands.

"Poor Mr. Giles," Tara said.

Willow came back down, laptop in her grasp. She had caught the gist of their conversation. "He wouldn't be Giles without his musty books."

No one missed the sweet smiles the two witches exchanged.

* * *

Spike moved the curtain aside. He peeked out the window to the front lawn. Buffy had a stick and poked the grass. He hardly noticed the obscure behavior. Instead he was wrapped up with the sight of her in the sun. She glowed. She was the definition of effulgent. The rays played with her, dancing around her with color. His chest ached. He had the compulsion to run outside, despite the skin ailment. But then rational thought came back.

There was still a bit of William left in him. He shook his head.

"What is she doing?"

Spike had been so caught up in his Buffy goddess worship that he hadn't sensed the boy sneak up.

"Is it time for the spring poking already?" Xander continued.

Spike glared at him. "What are you on about?"

"Don't tell me you hadn't noticed how she's poking the ground. Is that a new pastime I haven't heard of?"

Spike turned back to the window. "It is rather odd." Not even Drusilla had poked the ground. Buffy was doing it with great concentration too.

"That's our Buffy, I guess. She's never of the norm."

"No, defiantly not. She's special."

"No one like her."

Something suddenly came to Spike. "Hey, are we having a conversation?"

That caught Xander off guard. "No, I'm talking . . . and you are talking back . . . which I guess is a conversation. You know, not all conversations are friendly. Have I mentioned today that I don't like you?"

"Not yet."

"Well, I don't."

"Mutual. I don't like you either."

"Good. As long as that is understood."

* * *

"So, Warren hasn't planted a camera," Buffy announced.

"Is that what the poking was about, luv?" Spike asked.

"Mmm hmm."

She stepped up and gave him a kiss. Her tongue slipped inside his mouth and swirled with his. Afterwards she felt dizzy and stumbled backwards. He steadied her.

"You aren't going to black out again on us, are you?" her boyfriend questioned.

She laughed. "Kiss, silly. Got me all floaty." She made hand motions in the air.

"In that case . . ." He moved in for another kiss.

"I found something!" Willow announced.

The couple abandoned their private actions and headed into the dining room. Xander, Dawn, and Anya hurried in as well. Tara already had a seat next to Willow.

"It might be a time shifter," Willow explained. "It can manifest itself when someone attempts to change the past. You see, when someone time travels they not only reset this dimension but all the dimensions that exist. A time shifter propels from one dimension to the next."

"What about the future?" Xander asked.

"That's not possible. It hasn't been written yet. I knew this demon once who tried to go to the future. He ended up erasing himself because there was nowhere for him to go. The future wasn't there yet. You can only go back and revise what has occurred. Kind of like a manuscript. You can not change things until you have something to change. You can't go back to before you were born either. Only your essence gets transported. If you have no body you'd just be wandering around as a ghost." Anya said.

"Ah, I have seen the light."

Buffy stood to the side. She had a feeling this wasn't headed anywhere good.

"So this time shifter. . ." Buffy urged Willow to go on.

"Right. The shifter is a nonentity, meaning it has no form. It gets inside people's heads and manipulates thoughts, making them believe things." Willow directed her gaze on Buffy. "That would be how you were able to enter that imaginary world. It was all an illusion this thing created."

"Wait, this can't be the cause," Xander said. "Someone would have had to change time."

Tara fidgeted in her seat. "None of us have. But Warren could have."

"Not a scenario I like. I really hate that guy."

Buffy met Dawn's eyes. They looked as worried as she felt.

At that moment Giles came in. He was out of breath.

"Did you find anything?" Buffy asked.

"Buffy, I need to speak with you privately," he replied.

"Is it about a time shifter?"

"Y-yes." The volume of his voice lowered.

Buffy scanned the scene. Dawn gave her a look that screamed 'We're in trouble'. They were. It was either outright lie or come clean.

"Giles, you've been beaten by Willow. She found the information first. I think there is no way around it. I'm going to have to spill."

"But I thought . . ."

"What are you talking about?" Spike asked.

She took a deep breath. Here goes nothing.

"Guys, Dawn and I are from the future."

* * *

More fun on the way. 


	24. Muddled Mess of Things

REPLAY

Author: Heather Martin (SinisterChic)

Rating: PG13

Spoilers: Season 6, Season 7, Angel season 5

Summary: S/B, Learning of Spike's resurrection Dawn and she venture to LA in search of him. But they are too late. . . Or are they? Is there a way to fix things before they began to get dark?

Archive: Just let me know where

You guys trust me, right? Please do when reading this chapter.

**Chapter 24- Muddled Mess of Things**

Chaos exploded throughout the dining room. Questions were asked all at once. Dawn sent her sister a 'Are you insane?' look. Giles muttered a few obscenities under his breath. Buffy watched, a little uncertain how to go on after her confession. Should she tell everybody about the future she had left?

"How could you not tell us?" Willow inquired a little hurt.

"How'd you do it?" Anya asked.

"Oh God in the heavens, this is so not good," Xander remarked.

"There are always consequences," Spike said. "How many times do I have to remind you lot of that?"

"What could have gone so wrong that you had to turn back the clock?" Willow questioned.

Buffy's head hurt. There was too much commotion. She tried to tune them out.

"We didn't even mean to do it. It was an accident," Dawn defended in regard to Spike's statement.

"I still don't understand why you didn't come to us. We could have helped," Willow said.

"Do I ever get my own shop?" Anya asked. She huffed when she was ignored.

The tuning out wasn't working so well. Buffy's discomfort became physically noticeable.

"Silence!" Giles yelled.

The voices stopped. Buffy silently thanked Giles for the intervention.

"Very good. Now, we can go about this in a calm and civilized manner." All eyes went to the middle-aged man. "First off, Buffy did not keep this knowledge from everyone. She did come to me for guidance. She didn't want to tell you all in fear that the future events may upset you."

"But shouldn't she have told us?" Willow spoke up. "We should have had a choice on whether we wanted to change them or not."

Buffy gripped the back of the chair in front of her. "Believe me, Will, you want to change them."

"But shouldn't that be my decision? You have no right to change my life without my consent."

Fire burned inside Buffy's chest. Her eyes hardened. "And you had no right to bring me back from the dead without my consent!"

Willow deflated. Discomfort spread through the entire room.

"Sorry," Buffy said with a sigh. "Look, I was only trying to do what was right. I want the best for all of us. Just like what you thought was the best when you brought me back. Things went really bad this year. I've already made things better."

Xander raised his hand. "I'm kinda with Willow. I want to know how my life has been altered."

"I- I guess you should have the freedom to know." She paused. "You and Anya broke up," Buffy said.

Xander sat up straighter. "What? Huh?"

"You didn't marry her before," Dawn added.

That unnerved Anya. She cast Xander a look. "You are going to marry me, right Xander? Because you promised me that we were only postponing the wedding for later."

"I'm going to marry you, Ahn." He placed his hand on hers.

"Good." Anya faced Buffy. "I fully back you up on the time travel if you helped me keep Xander. Thank you."

Buffy addressed Willow. "You let the magic take you over with Rack."

"Oh," Willow said.

Spike leaned back in his chair. He propped his boots up on the table. Buffy would have chastised him about manners but she was too preoccupied with more important things.

"What about me, pet? You muddle with my unlife as well?"

Buffy hugged her arms. She couldn't tell by his voice how he felt. Usually she could.

"Spike? Uh . . ."

He looked directly at her. She could see in his eyes that he wasn't completely happy. "I've been violated enough don't you think?" He gestured to his head, indicating the chip.

"Spike, things between us were wrong the first time. I made them better."

In a fluid motion Spike was on his feet. He pointed to Willow. "You know I hate to agree with any of you scoobies but Red is right. You shouldn't have played with us. You should have let us in, instead of moving us around like bloody chess pieces."

Buffy gaped. She couldn't believe this was happening. Everyone was against her. All she wanted to do was make things right.

Dawn stepped up to her side. She put an arm around Buffy.

"Buffy isn't alone in this. I'm just as much to blame in this. Send your hate my way too," Dawn said.

"No-No one hates anyone, Dawn," Tara said, ever the peacemaker.

"No, no one hates anyone. But they damn well aren't tip toes in the tulips about the circumstances either," Spike growled. He stomped off toward the door.

Buffy spun to chase after him.

"Spike, wait!"

Spike grabbed his duster that he had discarded near the entrance. He put it on fiercely without looking at her.

"I need time to think," Spike said before dashing out.

Buffy stood there frozen. All this work and she had to wonder if anyone was any happier than before. At least she knew she wasn't.

* * *

Spike went back to his crypt. He rummaged through his liquor stash and accumulated everything he had. The rest of the evening was spent getting smashed and wallowing in his melancholy.

He loved Buffy. He'd do just about anything for her. He generally believed she returned his affection. But a relationship was a fifty-fifty deal. He wasn't going to allow her to call all the shots. She should have told him what was going on.

He tipped the last bottle back. Nothing came out. Bugger, now he had nothing to numb the pain.

There was a loud bang as his door flew open. He whipped his head to the side. He saw the slayer stalk in. She looked determined.

"Back to breaking and entering, huh, slayer?"

She came to a halt. "Spike, we need to talk."

He hurled the empty bottle across the room. Then he stood up. His button-down shirt was open, exposing his well-muscled chest proudly. His hair was also slightly mussed. He must have appeared quite irresistible to Buffy, but she didn't make it outwardly known.

Buffy crossed her arms. "Are you sober enough to hear me out?"

Those words made Spike laugh manically. "Unfortunately so."

She nodded. "I've been thinking." She met his eyes. "Spike . . . William. . ."

His real name caught his attention. He waited with apprehension for her to go on.

"I have feelings for you, but . . ." She swallowed. She looked down. "This doesn't seem to be working out. I thought we could be happy together but I guess I was wrong. All we ever give each other is pain."

He stared at her in shock. "You can't be serious."

"I am."

Spike felt his world teeter.

"I tried," Buffy said. "You're pulling me down and I can't let that happen. I have to be strong about this."

All rational slipped away to be replaced by instinct. When someone is faced with a life and death situation their primal being comes to the surface. To Spike, Buffy was his life and it was very much in jeopardy. He had to fight to keep it. His demon battled within him and he gladly succumbed to it.

Spike came at Buffy. He gripped her shoulders harshly.

"I won't allow you to do this," he said.

She wriggled in his grasp. "Spike, stop it! You're holding me too tight!"

"I know you were happy. I could feel it."

Buffy was really scared now. She yanked out of his fingers. He wasn't going to let her get away that easy. He pushed her down, pinning her to the floor while on top of her. She thrashed around.

"You could feel it while I was in you. I'll make you feel it again."

"Spike, stop! Argh, you're hurting me!"

Spike tugged at her blouse. He ripped it to squeeze her bra covered breast. Buffy got the advantage and kneed him, sending him flying. He landed violently on the stone floor. Buffy picked herself up. She held her blouse closed.

"Ask me again why I could never be happy with you!" Buffy shouted accusingly.

"I didn't mean . . . I wouldn't have . . ." Spike began.

"Yes, you would have if I hadn't stopped you."

His whole meaning for being was being tossed away. He huddled into a ball and rocked back and forth.

Oh God, Oh God, what had he done?

He'd hurt the girl. He'd hurt the woman he loved.

He was a monster. Never a man, never.

He'd never be what she deserved.

A gentle hand came down on his shoulder. His head shot up.

"Spike?"

Her voice was too soft. How could it be so caring after what he had just done?

"Don't touch me!" he spat.

Buffy jumped back from her crouch in front of him.

He clutched his head. "I hurt you. You shouldn't ever have to touch a demon like me again."

Buffy furrowed her brow. "Spike, are you all right?"

He snorted.

"I came here to talk."

"Thought we did that already."

She came closer. She reached out a hand as if to touch him but then decided against it. "Spike, I just got here a minute ago."

His eyes went wide.

* * *

Hehe. Did I have you going? I hope so. I like playing, it is so fun. 


	25. Losing Substance

REPLAY

Author: Heather Martin (SinisterChic)

Rating: PG13

Spoilers: Season 6, Season 7, Angel season 5

Summary: S/B, Learning of Spike's resurrection Dawn and she venture to LA in search of him. But they are too late. . . Or are they? Is there a way to fix things before they began to get dark?

Archive: Just let me know where

Sorry, guys, all these mind games are due to my philosophy class. It gives you nasty evil ideas.

**Chapter 25- Losing Substance**

Spike resembled a little lost boy. Buffy wanted to wrap him in her arms and comfort him. She couldn't help but compare him to the souled basement vampire. He was so confused and frightened.

"I just got here, Spike," Buffy repeated.

"You mean you didn't break up with me?" he whispered.

"What? No! God, Spike, I came here to make up with you."

Spike wildly looked around. "I don't know what is real anymore."

This sounded familiar.

"You aren't hearing voices that say 'From Beneath You it Devours', are you?"

He shook his head. "No. I'm getting the loony combo of hearing, seeing, and touching."

"Spike, what happened exactly? What happened that didn't really happen?"

Spike leaned against the wall, his knees up to his chest. He had stopped crying but wetness still lingered on his face. He gazed up at the ceiling.

"I hurt you."

"I gathered that much. But how?"

"I forced you. I got you down on the ground and tried . . ."

The air felt colder all of a sudden. "Oh."

There was a span of silence.

"Spike, it didn't happen. You wouldn't do that again?"

"How do I know that, huh? How do I know that wasn't reality and this is the phony?"

Buffy took his hand. He flinched. She shushed him and brought his palm to rest on her heart.

"Feel that? I'm real."

He let out a sob.

"Buffy, what is happening?" he asked.

"Something is playing with us. The time shifter. The same thing that made me believe you were dead and Angel had turned human."

Spike snatched back his hand. "Sounds like bloody paradise to me."

"It wasn't. Spike, I love you. You have to believe that if not anything. I want you and no one else."

"Wait, did you say again?"

"Huh?"

"I hurt you before?" Spike banged his head against the wall. "Was this part of the past you had to change?"

Did it matter? It hadn't happened in this time. He hadn't really tried to rape her. It was all an illusion created by this time shifter to rattle them around a bit. Apparently it was working.

Buffy spoke slow and soothingly. "We both hurt each other the first time around. It wasn't just you. Actually I think it was mostly me. I messed with you so much. No meant yes. And when I finally did mean no. . ." She shut her eyes. "But you don't have to worry about that. I love you, so you don't have to worry about hurting me again. I'm all yours willingly."

She sensed movement and opened her eyes. Spike hovered over her, his expression hard.

"Not that simple, pet. I believe you love me. But what if you didn't? What if someday you decide you don't want to be with me?"

"But I won't," Buffy protested. "This is a forever deal."

"How do you know that? People change, luv. People feel different as time passes."

Yes, people did change. Her perspective on him surely did. She couldn't argue with him. Her heart squeezed as he inched further and further from her.

"If things weren't the way they were I'd do it. I'd try and . . . I'd force you. How can you live with that?" Spike touched his chest. "How can I live with that?"

Tears escaped her eyes. She stared up at him through her blurry vision.

"So, what are we going to do? You're just going to stay away from me because of what you would do if things 'weren't' the way they are?" Buffy spat.

Spike formed a fist and smashed it into the wall. It left an indent and bloodied his knuckles. He laughed without humor at his actions.

"I don't know," he said. "But I can't go on knowing that I'm not what you deserve."

Buffy picked herself up. "And what is it I deserve Mr.? Shouldn't that be for me to decide?"

His electric eyes stabbed into her. She had never seen them so piercing with emotion. He gestured toward the door. "You deserve someone who could take you out anytime of the day. Somebody who could give you babies. Somebody who could grow old with you." He paused. "But you also need somebody with a little monster. Somebody who could fight by your side, be your equal. But somebody who wouldn't let that monster take them over."

"There isn't anyone like that!" Buffy screamed. "I admit your qualifications sound pretty damn good, but there isn't anyone who falls under them. No one can be part vampire and part human at the same time."

Spike slumped against the wall. "I wish I could be."

"But it isn't possible. When you accept that I'll be waiting."

She turned and left.

* * *

Willow scrolled through her results. 1-10 of 416,000. This could take awhile. She heard footsteps near and turned away from the laptop. Her eyes went wide.

"Tara?" She sat up.

"I've been thinking about what Buffy did. You can't expect to turn back time every time you make a mistake."

Willow scooted to the end of the bed. "Are you all right?"

"That means you should make things right the first time, don't you think?" Tara asked.

Willow nodded.

"So, I'm going to do something that I think will lead in a positive direction," Tara went on.

Tara stepped over. She pressed Willow flat against the mattress. Willow gasped in surprise as Tara kissed her deeply.

* * *

The boy was weak. The time shifter liked weak minds. They were easy to take hold of, easy to control.

This Warren didn't even attempt to fight him. Maybe he liked what the time shifter had planned.

* * *

Buffy took a deep sigh before knocking loudly on Xander's door. It didn't take long for him to answer. He looked out at her. She was glad to see that his gaze didn't hold hostility.

"I need to talk with someone," Buffy said. "I tried Willow but she was . . . preoccupied."

He held the door open wider. She took that as an invitation and went in. She glanced around the apartment. It was sparkling clean except for a single beer bottle on the coffee table. Xander sat down on the couch and Buffy sat nearby on the chair.

"First off, I'd like to apologize. I should have told you guys what was going on."

Xander grabbed the beer and took a sip. "I understand why you did what you did."

Her lips tugged up slightly. "Thank you for understanding."

"I'm not mad," he added.

"Oh, good. I was worried. So, we're good? Can we move past the me apologizing?"

He set the beer down. "I'm all ears. You've helped us all out, now it's time for us to lend a hand for you."

Buffy folded her hands in her lap. She looked down at them. "Spike sorta doesn't want to see me anymore."

"Are you for real? Spike, the guy who stalked you? Who chained you up to a wall? Who risked his life against a hell god?"

She nodded. "He's scared he's going to hurt me. The time spinner made him believe he did. He won't even touch me now."

"Buffy, don't beat me up for saying this but maybe he has a point."

She turned her head to face him. "What?"

"Spike's a vampire, Buffy. He doesn't have a soul. Just some leash they jammed in his head. You think he'd be all snuggles if that chip ever stopped working? I have to give him some credit for realizing that he's no good for you."

Buffy jumped to her feet. "I can't believe I came to you for advice! I thought you'd be a friend about this. But you can't see past your demon bigotry!"

"Your feelings are clouding your judgment, Buffy. Everyone else knows what he really is. You're the only one that seems to have forgotten."

"Ugh, I can't deal with your issues! Goodbye, Xander."

Buffy stormed out, slamming the door on her way.

* * *

That's just Xander for ya. 


	26. Lingering Shadows

REPLAY

Author: Heather Martin (SinisterChic)

Rating: PG13

Spoilers: Season 6, Season 7, Angel season 5

Summary: S/B, Learning of Spike's resurrection Dawn and she venture to LA in search of him. But they are too late. . . Or are they? Is there a way to fix things before they began to get dark?

Archive: Just let me know where

All I can say is just hang in there, guys.

**Chapter 26- Lingering Shadows**

What a way to wake up. Willow rolled over and moaned in pleasure. Tara snuggled closer and nuzzled her neck. They both smiled. Sunlight streamed in through the blinds, warming their skin.

"I think we made the right decision, don't you?" Tara asked.

"Definitely," Willow replied.

The couple lay there, basking in each other for a long while.

"Should we get up?" Tara questioned.

"Don't want to," Willow whined.

Tara chuckled. She snaked her arm around her girlfriend.

"We have school," Tara said.

"Who says education is important?"

Tara tickled Willow's middle. The redhead squirmed and giggled.

"All right, all right, we'll get up!" Willow shrieked.

The merciless torture was abandoned. Instead Tara kissed Willow on the temple. Then she got up to gather her clothing. Willow watched her fondly as she dressed. Afterward Tara turned with a scolding look.

"I don't see you getting dressed," Tara teasingly chastised.

"Just taking my time."

Willow slowly rolled out of bed. She searched for an outfit to put on.

"Do you think I was too harsh on Buffy?" Willow asked.

Tara turned, serious. "A little bit. She was only trying to help."

Willow nodded. "You're right. I should apologize. I might have done the same thing if I were in her situation."

Willow finished buttoning up her blouse. She stood in front of the mirror.

"Hey, clothes," Willow remarked.

A playful smirk spread across Tara's features. "Better not get used to them," she said.

"Yes, ma'am."

Willow tugged on Tara's belt, bringing her in for a kiss. They shared a brief tender moment.

"Mmm . . . Xander," Tara said.

"Okay, not the response I was fishing for."

Tara pointed out the window. "No, he's here. Outside, talking to Buffy."

"I hope they're making up," Willow said. "Buffy mentioned about how they had a fight yesterday."

"I hope so too. That's the best part."

All of a sudden there was a loud scream from outdoors. Willow recognized it as Buffy's.

"Tara, move!"

Tara blinked in confusion. Willow didn't think. She moved to push her out of the way.

But it wasn't fast enough. A loud boom filtrated through the air. Red splattered.

"Your shirt," Tara murmured before falling forward.

"Tara!"

* * *

Buffy stared up at the blue sky. It was so bright and clear. The world was so beautiful and warm. She should have been admiring it. Instead she cursed the fact that Spike couldn't be out enjoying it with her. She wished with all her heart that things were different. That there was such a thing as a half vampire/half human hybrid. Mostly, though, she wished that he could move past that and accept things for the way they were. She loved him, therefore, he had no reason to lose control and hurt her.

"Hey."

She spun around, shielding her eyes. Xander stood there. He shuffled his feet, looking sheepish.

"Hey," Buffy said.

Xander sighed. "Sometimes I wish there was a pill to ward off stupidity."

"Is that an apology?"

"I was getting to that. But, uh, yeah. I'm sorry. I'm glad you trusted me enough to come to me about Spike. It's me who has their judgment clouded. He. . . This is hard to admit. He has done some good for you. I've never seen you so happy." He paused and studied her. "And yet, right now you seem pretty down."

She nodded. "Love does that to you, I guess. It can mend the world or break it apart."

He smiled. "Good analogy. And true."

She smiled back, but hers was sad.

"Look, Buffy, you and Willow mean everything to me. I don't know what I'd do without you guys."

"Let's not find out." She moved in to hug him.

He hugged her back. "I wasn't done."

"Oh, continue then."

"I'll try my best to be supporto guy. Whatever you decide I'm with ya. I'll put an effort not to fall into my vampire equals complete evil principle."

"Thank you."

He pointed at her. "Doesn't mean I'm going to be nice to him."

Her lips cracked into a real smile. "Wouldn't dream of making you."

The wind picked up and she could feel a warning in the air. Buffy glanced around. Her heart sped up.

"Xander, we should go inside. We can't be out here," Buffy said.

"Huh?" He looked around, not seeing the cause of panic.

Buffy grabbed his arm. She began to drag him toward the door.

"We were standing right there," she said. "And he came out of nowhere." She began to hyperventilate.

Xander stopped her. "You need to calm down."

She violently shook her head. "No, no calming down. Can't. He's going to come with a gun. Tara. We have to warn Tara!"

"I'm not getting any of this. Who's going to come with a gun?"

"Warren. We have to somehow stop him or Tara will die."

"Buffy!" Xander said, looking over her shoulder.

Time seemed to stop. Buffy couldn't move.

"I'm going to kill you all!" Warren raged from behind her. "You think you can change it all." Warren laughed crazily. "Yeah, he told me your plans. Well, think again."

* * *

Willow fell to her knees beside a motionless Tara. She took hold of her shoulders and rolled her over.

"Tara, baby!"

She gathered her up into her arms. She began to sob when Tara didn't respond.

"Get up! Please! Oh God!"

She searched for a pulse and found none.

"No . . . No."

* * *

You guys hate me, I know. 


	27. As the Cloud Darkens

REPLAY

Author: Heather Martin (SinisterChic)

Rating: PG13

Spoilers: Season 6, Season 7, Angel season 5

Summary: S/B, Learning of Spike's resurrection Dawn and she venture to LA in search of him. But they are too late. . . Or are they? Is there a way to fix things before they began to get dark?

Archive: Just let me know where

All I can say is just hang in there, guys.

**Chapter 27- As the Cloud Darkens **

"Tara, move!" Buffy shouted. It was the only thing she could do. She didn't have enough time for anything else.

Warren aimed, his finger over the trigger. He grinned wickedly as he prepared to fire. Xander threw himself forward. The Scooby knocked himself into Warren and grappled for the gun. The weapon lost its target on Buffy. Somehow during the fight Warren managed to shoot. There was a loud bang as the bullet flew.

All Buffy could think was 'oh God'. Her gaze traveled to the second story window.

* * *

Warren got the upper hand and tossed Xander off him. He got a better grip on the gun. Laughing he said, "I'm better, stronger. You can't stop me."

He started to bring the gun up. His arm shook. What was happening?

_Bring the gun to your head._

No. Why would he want to do that?

_You are no longer necessary. I found another host. _

"No!" Warren screamed aloud.

_Bring the gun to your head. _

Against his own accord, his hand went up. He pressed the gun to his temple. Warren never got scared. He got angry as hell, but never frightened. Until that moment, because he knew he was going to die. By his own hand.

Something was inside him. He had felt something different before. He had felt stronger somehow, although he had no notion of the cause.

"Warren, what are you doing?"

Hah, that was Buffy. She was trying to save him despite all the evil things he had done. Ever the hero.

Warren closed his eyes and blew his brains out.

* * *

Buffy gawked in horror. Warren lay on the ground, blood pooling from his head. The gun was still in his grasp. She brought her hand up to cover her mouth. She had seen a lot of horrible things. Nothing had ever seemed this gruesome, this realistic. This was death from a front row seat.

Xander hugged Buffy, while turning her head away. Oh, Xander. She was the slayer and yet he knew that there was still a girl inside. She inwardly thanked him, wishing she could do it outright. But she couldn't. The slayer had to be strong, couldn't show her weakness.

"Something made him do that," Buffy said.

"Buffy, he was crazed. Are you sure he didn't all of a sudden realize what he was doing and end it all?" Xander replied.

She shook her head. "I'm sure. Something was messing with him. Didn't you see his hesitation?" Her eyes enlarged.

"The time shifter?" Xander said.

Just then Willow exited the house. She stopped in front of her friends. Her eyes were blank.

"Willow, God, are you okay?" Xander asked.

"How did this happen?" Willow asked softly.

"Warren. He had a gun."

"Warren."

"I tried to stop him but . . . He pulled the trigger anyway."

Willow walked off. She stepped over Warren's corpse as if she didn't even notice it was there.

"Hey!" Buffy protested. "Where are you going?"

"Will!" Xander called. He turned to Buffy. "Should we go after her?"

Buffy glanced up at the house. "Tara." She burst into the house and raced upstairs. The door to the master bedroom was cracked open, beckoning her to enter. She stepped inside. The room was still and calm, completely contrary to her mood.

A beam of light cascaded over Tara, as if it were a spotlight. Buffy knelt by her side. Her honey hair spilled around her face. Buffy brushed it aside.

"Tara?"

Tara's blue eyes stared up at the ceiling.

"Tara?" Buffy fought the impulse to shake her.

And then the miracle happened. Tara blinked. Buffy laughed in relief. Blood had formed on the witch's top. Buffy searched for the wound. She pressed down on it with pressure.

"Willow?" Tara whispered.

"Shhh," Buffy hushed. "Don't talk."

Xander bounded into the room. He paled at the sight.

"Call 911!" Buffy shrieked.

* * *

The house was empty when Dawn arrived home from school. Dread washed over her at the quiet.

"Buffy!" she called.

She dropped her bag to the floor. This was the day Tara had been shot, she realized, going stiff. How could she have forgotten? She had traveled a whole year through time and forgotten this earth shattering event? How could Buffy have sent her off to school? How could she have gone as if nothing was wrong? What if Tara lay cold upstairs?

Dawn braced herself before she ascended to the next level. Deja vu took over. She pushed open the door. She took a deep breath and looked past the bed. There was nothing there except a blood stain on the carpet. That fact didn't appease her any bit.

"Dawn?"

The teen turned. Giles stood in the doorway. His expression was grim.

"Is she . . .?"

He sighed. "No. Buffy and Xander managed to get her to the hospital but things are still uncertain."

Dawn nodded. She threw herself at him. He awkwardly held her, offering fatherly comfort.

"Buffy sent me here to fetch you."

She nodded.

* * *

Buffy hunched over in her chair, her face in her hands. Xander reached over and placed a hand on her back. It didn't really offer any comfort but she was grateful just the same.

Just then Dawn's voice penetrated her ears. "Buffy!"

Buffy's head shot up. She jumped to her feet. Her sister hurled into her arms. They clung together, emotion swallowing them both. Buffy looked over Dawn to Giles. He met her gaze gloomily.

"Any news?" the man asked.

The girls separated but continued to hold hands.

"She's in surgery," Buffy replied. "The doctors said it could be awhile."

He nodded. "Any sign of Willow?"

Darkness washed over her. She felt ice cover her chest. "No. We need to find her. I-I don't understand . . . Why would she leave Tara? It doesn't make any sense."

"Unless she thought Tara was dead," Xander said.

Buffy's eyes grew large. "Or someone 'made' it appear that way."

Dawn seemed stricken. "You mean . . .?"

"The time shifter." Buffy let go of Dawn. "Xander, you check the Magic Box. Giles, make sure Andrew and Jonathan are unharmed. Dawn and I'll search out Rack. Willow went there last time."

"This all happened before?" Xander asked.

"Not completely," Buffy said. She sighed. "I don't have time to get into it all. After this is all done I'll give you the time travel 101. But now –"

"Right. Got you."

* * *

Xander helped Anya up. She staggered a little. He led her over to a chair near the research table. He knelt down before her.

"Do you feel any change? Can you talk?" he asked.

Anya leaned her head against him. "It's wearing off. Willow was here earlier. She put the whammy on me and went straight to the dark arts books. Sucked them dry."

He rubbed her back. "Look, Ahn, something bad happened earlier."

"I know." She paused. "Tara."

Xander nodded. "Yes, but not the way you think. She's not dead, but at the hospital. Willow's been caught in a delusion that Tara didn't make it."

Anya met his eyes. "She's okay?"

"Hopefully she will be. The doctors are working on her. But right now we have to worry about Willow. She's not in her right mind. Did she say anything to you?"

Shaking her head, she said," No, not a thing. She seemed out of it. Just went to the books and stripped them."

"Is there a locator spell you could do?"

"There aren't any books left," Anya stated matter of factly.

Feeling like an idiot, Xander said, "Oh. Right."

* * *

Giles hesitated before ringing the doorbell. Afterward he stuffed his hands into his long coat and waited. He heard muttered voices before the door opened.

"Give that back! Asura Priest is extremely rare!"

Giles stared dumbfounded as he witnessed the two boys battle over a card. Finally the blond snatched it away triumphantly. He hugged it to him protectively as if it were precious gold. Jonathan glared at him. Giles cleared his throat.

Andrew looked over. "Oh. What are you doing here?"

"Have you seen Willow recently?"

"-No."

Jonathan looked interested. "Why?"

"I would suggest you take cover," Giles told them. "It seems that magic has consumed her. She is out for vengeance."

"What did we do?" Andrew asked with panic.

"Nothing really. Except that you were once friends with Warren."

"But we're good now!" the boy protested. "We're like Darth Vader in the last Star Wars."

"Willow? Willow-Willow? The Willow that used to pack her school lunches?" Jonathan questioned.

"The very one. Extraordinary, I know. She is under the influence of a powerful demon and the darkest magics imaginable," Giles said.

Andrew glanced at Jonathan. "Dude, we gotta get out of here. Mexico, we can go to Mexico!"

"Mexico?" Jonathan asked dubiously.

"That's the best hide out ever."

Giles frowned. "Buffy thought you deserved a warning."

The watcher turned. He could hear them bicker as he walked away. He shook his head. His duty was done. They could decide what to do about the news he offered.

* * *

Buffy and Dawn burst into the Magic Box. They halted at the sight of the dispersed books. Buffy took one and flipped through the blank pages.

"Damn," the slayer muttered.

"Every last one," Anya said.

Buffy shut the book. "She did the same thing to Rack."

Xander stepped forward. "What do you mean by that?"

"Drained him," she clarified.

Xander turned white. "This is so not good."

"Where could she be?"

The bell to the shop sounded. All heads turned toward the front of the shop. Spike stood there. He scanned them all. His eyes landed on Buffy.

"There's speak of another apocalypse," he said.

* * *

Power. The time shifter had never felt so much. He was humming with it. There was so much he didn't know what to do with it. He wondered why he had even bothered with the boy.

Willow came to a stop on the bluff. She rose her hands. They crackled with life. The time shifter chuckled as the ground rumbled.


	28. The Yellow Crayon Speech or Now The Live...

REPLAY

Author: Heather Martin (SinisterChic)

Rating: PG13

Spoilers: Season 6, Season 7, Angel season 5

Summary: S/B, Learning of Spike's resurrection Dawn and she venture to LA in search of him. But they are too late. . . Or are they? Is there a way to fix things before they began to get dark?

Archive: Just let me know where

**Chapter 28- The Yellow Crayon Speech (or Now Known as the Live for Love One)**

They walked at a fast pace. Buffy led them, Spike right behind her. The others fought to keep up.

"This can't be happening," Anya whined. She looked over at Xander. "You still haven't married me. Did you know this was going to happen? Is that why you postponed it?"

Xander blinked in surprise. "What? No. Of course not!"

She grabbed his arm and clung to it. "I'm sorry, I'm being silly. But you can't blame me. We're all going to die."

"We're not going to die," Xander assured her.

"You can't know that."

Buffy glanced back. "We're not going to die. All Xander has to do is give his yellow crayon speech."

"My what?" Xander asked.

"Oh, you know," Buffy said. "Willow broke the yellow crayon in kindergarten and cried."

"I'm still with the huh here. That's going to save the world?"

Buffy turned back around. "You bragged about it enough in the future. It'll come to you."

"If you say so."

The group slowed their pace as they grew nearer. Storm clouds had formed over Kingsman's Bluff. A small figure could be seen standing on the platform of land. Lightning sparked in the air.

"Dear lord," Giles remarked. He tore the glasses from his face.

"Holy," Xander said. He took a step closer.

Spike stared, his face hard.

Dawn took a breath and ventured forth. Buffy followed.

"Willow!" Dawn called.

Willow didn't respond.

Buffy halted Dawn just before she reached the chaos. "Willow!?"

Xander came running. He gasped at the sight of his best friend. Her hair had turned raven and blew around her face wildly. Blue veins ran across her flesh like spider webs.

"Willow, think about what you're doing!" Buffy yelled.

Willow made no sign of acknowledgment.

"Can she even hear us?" Dawn questioned.

"Talk to her, Xander. If anyone can reach her it is you," Buffy told Xander.

He hesitated a moment before trying just that. "Willow? It's Xander. You know, that guy you've known since we were one inch tall. Uh . . ." He nervously glanced at Buffy for reassurance. She motioned him to continue. "We've always been close. Uh . . . Uh . . .The yellow crayon!"

This was a disaster. She should have sent Xander up here by himself.

There was a span of silence. Xander searched for how to continue. "The yellow crayon, yeah, uh . . . First day of kindergarten. You cried because you broke the yellow crayon, and you were too afraid to tell anyone."

"This is getting us nowhere."

Buffy snapped her head to the side. She hadn't even sensed Spike come up.

Xander turned toward Buffy. "Look, did I ever tell you exactly how this yellow crayon speech went?"

She frowned. "Not the details, no."

"Well, it isn't coming to me like you promised."

Spike pointed at the witch. "She can't even hear a bloody thing. That thing has her under his mojo. Too far gone." The ground gave a heavy shake. Buffy would have lost her balance but he caught her before she fell. He steadied her. "Whatever you do, better do it fast."

Buffy shut her eyes. Think, damn it, think.

"If only I had my books," Giles commented. "We could have found a way to expel the shifter."

Buffy clung to Spike as the earth trembled once more. She feared this was it. She opened her eyes again and let them drown in his pools of blue. His expression was soft.

"I love you," she whispered. "You believe me, right?"

If the world was going to end she had to be sure.

"Yeah. But I can't understand why," Spike said. "After . . ."

"Shhh."

She kissed him hard. She meshed herself to him, begging to become one. He was uncertain at first but then surrendered to her. They would have continued the dance, but they were suddenly knocked apart. Spike slammed to the ground on his back. Buffy hit on her rear.

"The shifter travels through dimensions, right?" Dawn asked as she picked herself up.

Giles nodded. "Yes."

"So, if there was a portal into one it would leave?"

"In theory."

"Good enough."

The teen stalked over to Spike. She rolled up her sweater and held her arm out to him. He stood up and raised an eyebrow at her.

"Bite me," she commanded.

He took a step back. "What are you on about?"

"I need blood for it to work. Please. I trust you."

A light bulb went off. Spike gingerly took Dawn's wrist.

"Are you sure you can do this, Dawnie?" Buffy asked.

"No. But I have to try." Dawn addressed Spike again. "Do it."

Fluidly, Spike's beautiful face shifted into that of a demon. He studied her with golden eyes. Then he slowly brought his elongated teeth to her wrist. They sunk down into her skin and she hissed from the sting. He sucked briefly before letting her go. Red was smeared across his lips and he licked it off.

Dawn wavered on her feet.

"You all right, bit? I didn't think I took much."

"You didn't," Buffy agreed.

"I'm ok, guys," Dawn said. She stared down at her arm. Red trickled down it. She inhaled deeply.

"Step back," commanded Buffy.

Giles, Xander, and Anya obeyed.

Green burst out. It swirled around Dawn with madness. Willow dropped to her knees and cried out. A black mist tore from the redhead. The green sucked it into its midst.

Dawn wrapped her left hand around her wound. "I can't stop it!" she yelled.

"We have to stop the blood," Buffy said.

"Come here, nibblet. Vamp saliva has healing properties," Spike said.

Dawn allowed the vampire to lick up the blood, sealing the puncture wounds. The green portal gradually faded. Dawn leaned against Spike for support.

"Eww," she said to the stickiness of her wrist.

"You did good, Dawn," he commended.

She grinned tiredly.

Their attention shifted back to the risen temple. Willow got to her feet. She turned toward the gang, her black eyes full of fury.

"You may have stopped him but you are no match for me," she declared.

"Think about what you are doing," Buffy said. "There's no reason for it. Tara isn't dead."

"You lie. I felt her myself."

"The shifter clouded reality. She's in the hospital. Warren's gone. Everything is all right now."

"No, it is not all right!" Willow spat. "I've seen what this world has to offer. I can't stand it. All there is, is pain. It just keeps coming. How can you stand it?"

"I fight," Buffy said.

"But the fight never ends. There's only one way to stop it. Stop it all." Willow turned around to continue unleashing her wrath on the world. "You may not see it now but I'm saving us all."

Xander came in front of Willow. "Then start with me."

"Xander!" Anya shouted in protest.

"Stay where you are, Ahn."

"What are you doing?" Willow spat.

He held his arms out to the side. "If the world's going to end I wanna be the first to go."

"Step aside!"

"There's nowhere else for me to go. You've been my best friend my whole life. World gonna end ... where else would I want to be?"

She glared.

"I know you're in pain. The world knows how to dish that out. But it also knows how to give love. Don't you remember love? Tara isn't dead, Willow. Don't you want to be the first thing she sees when she wakes up?"

"Shut up!" Willow's hands sparked.

"And if that isn't enough, remember us, your friends. Buffy died for us. Live, she said. The hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Live, for her. Remember? And me. . . I've never had the opportunity to sacrifice my life for yours but I'd do it in a heartbeat. I love you, Willow."

Willow dished out a bolt of electricity. Xander fell to his knees.

"Xander!" Anya called. She would have ran to him but Giles stopped her.

"I love you," Xander repeated to Willow. Tears formed in her eyes. "I love you."

She collapsed. Xander gathered her up in his arms. He rocked her back and forth. Her crying turned to deep sobs. Her hair flickered from black to red, back to black, and then stayed red. Buffy came over to hug her as well.

The cloud over Kingman's Bluff disintegrated and the sun came out to shine down on the trio. Buffy's head shot over, fear squeezing on her heart. Her worry was not necessary, however, because Spike was gone.

One more part, peoples. Yay!


	29. Your Reward

REPLAY

Author: Heather Martin (SinisterChic)

Rating: PG13

Spoilers: Season 6, Season 7, Angel season 5

Summary: S/B, Learning of Spike's resurrection Dawn and she venture to LA in search of him. But they are too late. . . Or are they? Is there a way to fix things before they began to get dark?

Archive: Just let me know where

**Chapter 29- Your Reward **

The first thing Tara saw was Willow. The red-head gave her a watery smile and squeezed her hand.

"Hey, you," Willow greeted.

Tara smiled. "Hi."

"You've been out for quite awhile."

"What'd I miss?"

Willow became serious. She let go of her girlfriend's hand and looked away. She was suddenly scared.

"I'm going away for awhile," Willow announced.

Surprise came over Tara. "Why? Not exactly the best news to wake up to."

"I did some stuff I shouldn't have."

Tara's expression darkened. "Magic stuff?"

Willow shifted nervously in her seat. "I'm not ready to talk about it. I'm going to England for help. It-It's my idea."

There was a span of silence.

"I-I'll come with you," Tara offered. "You could use a friend by your side."

Willow looked Tara back in the eye. "You can't go anywhere now. If you still want to come after you're all better, and after you've heard the whole story, then you're welcome."

* * *

Anya and Xander got married outside in a gazebo. There were no relatives invited, unless you counted their real family: Giles, Buffy, Willow, Dawn, and Tara. When the bouquet was tossed it practically fell into the slayer's arms. Her eyes stung, and she longed for something that she would never have.

The reception was held at the Summers residence. Buffy watched from the couch as Xander and Anya twirled around with Dawn to some music. Off to the side Willow and Tara whispered together. They seemed to be doing all right. In two days Willow would be heading to the coven. Tara was going to head over with her and see how it worked out. The scene around her filled her with bitter sweetness. Everything was resolved. Everyone was happy.

Except for herself.

Buffy snuck out without anyone noticing. The night was warm and quiet. Lightening bugs occasionally lit up in the blackness. Buffy sat down on the bottom step of her back porch to witness them.

Out of the shadows emerged a white head. The rest of him camouflaged with the night. The vamp slowly neared. He timidly met her gaze.

"Buffy," he whispered.

"Spike," she answered.

He stuffed his hands in his pockets. "There's something I gotta do."

She nodded. "You're going away. Seems that's the new trend. Willow, Tara, and Giles to England for a coven visit. Xander and Anya honeymoon in Hawaii. And you to Africa, right? For a soul?"

He shuffled his feet. "Can't go on knowin what might get loose given the opportunity. Want to know the people around me are safe- Want to give you what you deserve."

"We've been over this. I deserve a man who has a bit of monster. Can't happen. I have to settle for a monster with a bit . . . No, a big chunk of man."

His eyes widened at that.

"Go get your soul, Spike. I'll love you with it. But don't do it for me. Do it for you. Because frankly, I don't give a damn what you could do, I care about what you actually do," she added.

He opened his mouth but nothing came out.

"Go on, go. I'll be waiting," she said.

He turned to go. Then he paused and turned back around. She stood, hopeful that he had changed his mind. She wished for him to stay. She really did mean her words.

"Can I have a kiss goodbye?" he asked.

Buffy moved forward. She tenderly brought her lips to brush against his. There was no passion in the action. All there was, was love tinged with sadness.

"Promise to come back to me?" She touched his cheek.

He laid his palm over her hand. "No matter what."

Her heart felt like it tore in two when he pulled away. And she wondered if it really had, fore she was sure he took a part of her away with him.

He'll come back, she told herself, wrapping her arms around herself. He promised.

* * *

The pain was more than he ever felt, even with Glory. Spike rolled over and slowly rose to his knees. His alabaster skin was marred with black and blue. He stared into the dark cave.

"You have endured the required trials," a deep voice rumbled.

"Bloody right I have. So, you'll give me what I want? Make me what I was? So Buffy can get what she deserves."

The demon came out. His green eyes glowed brightly.

"Very well."

The demon placed his hand over Spike's heart. A reddish glow formed, followed by heat. Spike threw back his head and hollered.

"We will grant you . . . life."

Okay, life doesn't necessarily mean human, children. That's the end. Yet again, remember, there will be a sequel entitled Second the First.


End file.
